Alibi V.21 No.2 • Jan 12-18, 2012 

Culture Shock

Alibi's Valentine's Day Card Contest

Every year in February for about a week, the market value of roses inexplicably doubles. I was pondering this one Feb. 14 while waiting in a line full of well-groomed men in peacoats at a flower shop. I finally got to the head of the line and asked the flower clerk:

"Why so pricey on the roses today?"

She looked at me as if I were speaking Klingon. Then she started chuckling.

"Climate," she said. "Horrible rose-growing climate this time of year."

Don't ask me why she found that funny. Nothing funny about decimated agriculture and its residual economic strain. But handy inside info, nonetheless.

For those of you financially affected by the poor rose-growing climate of early February, may I present a project. It's called making a Valentine's Day card. A little history lesson: Before cards were things bought at Hallmark and Walgreens, they were something people made by hand. This process entails the difficult task of actually doing something creative to let your sweetheart know how you feel about him/her.

Or, if you're like this lovelorn writer and have no one to make a card for, the Alibi is willing to be your sweetheart. In fact, you don't even have to make your card out to us, and it doesn't really have to be about anything in particular as long as it's Valentine's Day-oriented. (Last year’s winner was a plastic bathroom sign complete with braille.) So here they are, the rules for the Alibi's ninth annual Valentine's Day Card Contest:

We’ll only accept one entry per person, and cards can be no larger than an 8 1/2-by-11-inch piece of paper. Mail or bring it to 413 Central NW, Albuquerque, N.M., 87102. Please don't send any animal parts or bodily fluids. Entries must be received by Monday, Jan. 30, at 4 p.m.

Winners will receive fabulous prizes that we have not figured out yet. Extra points will be awarded to people who send me roses.

Check out the Feb. 9 issue of the Alibi for the winning entries.