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Chicken Crosses Road

Man Watches in Horror

This is one homesick guinea hen.
This is one homesick guinea hen.

So, there’s this guy jogging around his neighborhood, because that’s pretty much what he likes to do a lot of the time, when all of a sudden he sees this weird ass chicken wandering around loose. So he catches the chicken, puts it in a dog crate and takes it to the crazy chicken lady across the street, thinking she’ll know what to do with it. The crazy chicken lady is all like, “yeah, I’ll make sure this chicken gets back home.” So she builds it a little pen in her backyard and staples a bunch of posters on telephone poles, thinking the chicken’s owner will see a flier and come get his chicken. Well, a couple days go by and then…very slowly… the crazy chicken lady begins to totally fall in love with this wacky new chicken.

Now, that sounds all just fine (but maybe a tiny bit boring) until you realize that the guy who found the chicken is my next door neighbor and the crazy chicken lady is my WIFE. Seriously, I don’t think we can bear the stress of another creature hanging around, trying to act all a certain way and everything. If this is your chicken and you want him back, shoot me an email or get my number off one of the posters my wife stuck around.

Oh, and yes I realize it’s a guinea hen.


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