I Am Poisoned!

Me and the   Alibi’s   spooky staircase.
Me and the Alibi’s spooky staircase.

The lesson: For goodness’ sake, just send it back.

I spent three hours last night watching my insides become outsides. I thought maybe it was the flu, but then my husband started going off this morning. We only ate one thing in common yesterday.

It was the kind of food they bring to every table when you sit down. And I could tell it wasn’t as fresh as it could be. But I pride myself on having an iron stomach, I’m not one to turn away free stuff and I never send anything back. Ever. I hated it when I was a waitress and some jerk would complain about food temp or something and get all huffy and then storm out no matter what I tried to do to correct it.

But sometimes my desire to be friendly, to do a good job on the customer part of the dining exchange, needs to be tempered. This is what I thought, in those exact words (lie), as I lost my innards. Today, I am but a ghost, wandering the halls of this Alibi office, empty and bitter.

I won’t say where we ate because of libel and all that. But that restaurant will be getting a phone call from me.

Here’s how to prevent food poisoning at home. I don’t do a lot of this stuff, but now I will.

While you’re at it, check out 15 famous ghost photos.