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Wait! J.D. Salinger Was Alive This Whole Time Until Just Dying at 91?

Just kidding; I knew he was alive. Not kidding that he’s dead

“Get off of my lawn!” Because he was old and liked to be left alone.
“Get off of my lawn!” Because he was old and liked to be left alone.

There are very few authors alive today who can say that the majority of Americans have read at least one of their works (Dan Brown does not count as an author). And now, there’s one fewer. J.D. Salinger, author of The Catcher in the Rye and Franny and Zooey Deschanel, has passed.

Here are a few things about Salinger it’s important to know for Trivial Pursuit:

He served in World War II.

He only wrote for 25 years (1940-1965).

Gave last interview in 1980.

A bunch of wingnuts have tried to ban The Catcher in the Rye because people are idiots.

He didn’t want anyone making a movie version of Catcher. Cue a bunch of producers who will now try to do just that.

He had an affair with an 18-year-old when he was in his 50s. Her name was Joyce Maynard and she auctioned off a bunch of their letters.

The assassin of John Lennon (He Who Must Not Be Named) carried Catcher in his pocket when he shot the musician. He said it would explain his motivation. I’m fairly certain that the ducks in Central Park do not represent murdering a Beatle, however.

Some idiot tried to publish his own sequel to Catcher. You know, I’m starting to get why Salinger became a recluse.

Please give a toast to J.D. Salinger, ya phonies.


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