The Feds Are Coming For Me!
If I don’t show up to work tomorrow, it’s because the FBI has arrested me, thrown me in jail and confiscated all my stuff. I just got an email from FBI director Robert Mueller III. The subject line of the email is as follows:
“Attn: This is to inform you that we the fbi have a warrant to arrest you if we dont hear from you immediately,this is the final warning you are going to receive from the fbi office do you get me? I hope youre understand how many times this message has been sent to you. We have warned you so many times and you have decided to ignore our e-mails we have been instructed to get you arrested immediately, and today if you fail to respond back to us with the payment then, we will close your bank account and jail you and all your properties will be confiscated by the fbi.Robert Mueller, III FB I Director”
That’s the subject line, mind you. Imagine how scary the email itself is. ... Actually, that’s all there is to the email. Huh.
By the way, if you ever need to contact the director of the FBI, his email address is firstname.lastname@example.org.