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(Comic) Relief for Your “Raging Election”

Give your burning, breaking news ulcer a few moments of respite. For your Election Day amusement, a small compendium of comedian tweets:

@iamjohnoliver: If Mitt Romney wins the election tonight, the White House will be one of the smallest houses he's ever lived in.

@GregtheGrouch: My polling place smelled like fish sticks today.

@steveagee: Vote yes on prop These Nuts

@Hamptonyount: How much did it cost you guys to vote? I feel like I got a deal.

@JohnCleese: Presidential election today when we finally find out just how batty America is...

@jackiekashian: Andy, "I anticipate a happy ending. To my raging election."

@toddbarry: They don't make a sticker for what I did today.

@tedalexandro: Senior citizen volunteers overseeing newfangled computer voting machines? There's no way this could go wrong!

@birbigs: Today is Halloween for adults. Let's all pretend we live in a democracy. #VOTE

@friedmanjon: I just voted for some Kenyan guy. LOL!

@mileskahn: Does anyone know if Fox News is on suicide watch? I'm really worred about them.

@mitchfatel: Just released! Documents prove Obama is half black!

@DougBenson: I'd like to see four more years of BREAKING BAD. Can we vote for that?

@mileskahn: Nate Silver says there's a 95% chance that if Obama wins he's "so getting laid."

@JenKirkman: An old lady who lives at the senior place I'm voting in just yelled out her room "Shut up!" to a crying baby. She's prob a hologram of my future.

@aasif: Are you kidding me Florida?

@PaulScheer: Vote No on Prop 36 which requires everyone you know to have a podcast. #vote2012

@julieklausner: Putting on shoes, getting ready to vote. If they don't have stickers OR a sugar free lolly for me, I'm going to flip my shit.

@JoshSneed: Just stole a big roll of "I Voted" stickers when this guy wasn't looking in case anyone that just wants to be left alone needs one. 'Merica.

@EugeneMirman: The Internet isn't the only place to tell strangers they're idiots, you can yell at folks in voting lines or throw leftover CSA veggies too.

@thelovemaster: Interesting how they word proposition descriptions to spin u. Think I just saw 1 promising daily blow jobs. #gotmyvote

@aishatyler: Yes. Vote first. Game second. You can't save the universe from the Covenant menace if you haven't saved democracy first.

@Ruth_A_Buzzi: How can we vote when they haven't even done that part where we see them in their swim suits?

 

Today's Events

Emily Bjustrom, of poetry organization To the Last Word, gives a reading.

Swamp String Band at Molly's Bar

Robo Task Force After School Program at ¡Explora!

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    Oct 12th @ The Launchpad
    Oct 12th @ The Launchpad10.12.2014