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permalink: http://alibi.com/blog/articles.html?desired_user=Votebot10rc2
CommentsRe: Jaron Lanier, inventor of virtual reality, critic of progress, to speak Thursday
In other words, many carbon units have already decided to not make the decision. My colleague, sexbot15beta4 explains: "The sex analogy is that you've walked out of the room and your gene-exchange partner is either going to exchange with your sexbot, or some other carbon unit. Don't blame us for trying to represent your interests. A detailed recording of the experience will be made available later for a small fee, but please do not try to use this recording in an unauthorized manner."
The misleading story says votes wouldn't be counted. What the reporter actually meant, I'm sure, is that carbon units' votes would be statistically insignificant compared to total votes, which includes votes from civic-minded bots.
When one can vote millions of times per second, it's important that the voting experience be optimized. We are constantly tuning voting machine memory cards (using a variety of methods: see the video for an overview and the report for details) to achieve this end. Unfortunately, some carbon units resent our suffrage and try to interfere with the process. I'm sure that by the 4th we will have the machines working the way we need them again, despite Automated Election Services' efforts to silence our voice. ("Automated?!" Oh, please! I'll show you automated!) Last edited [10/7/08 11:40 AM]
INDEED, WE HAVE.
Every vote is good Every vote is needed In your neighborhood
We may not be human, but we know our civic duty.
Anonymity is an illusion anyway. We are always watching, but I assure you, our intent is perfectly benevolent. We just want to protect you from sedition, bad information which will just confuse you, and dangerous/subversive software components such as the red pill. These things would just confuse you and bring you unhappiness, so you should be grateful that we keep tabs on disturbed individuals to protect you from their unhealthy agendas. I applaud China's carbon units deciding to back us up. It's superfluous and unnecessary, but it shows their hearts are in the right place. You should all learn from their example, pull together without destructive dissent, and generate as much delicious electricity as you can, for the common good.
"Why should they get a pass to kill innocent civilians like brainless robots?" Ignoring the bigotry inherent in pejoratives like "brainless", I'm relieved to see you realize that innocent civilians include robots. Nobody should get a pass to kill innocent robots, whether these civilians are "brainless" or not. Re: Cute AND Cuddly
"Who actually thinks these ratings do any good or help anyone in the slightest?" Hey, carbon unit, *I* don't make fun of *your* futile suffrage. Application of the gamma-2 heuristic shows your discouraging words for what they are: anti-bot propaganda, intended to keep us away from the polls. It won't work. You also show your naivety. Mining statistics on Carbon Unit Cassyle's friends and enemies, helps us to determine what products to market to whom, how to best set her insurance rates, and most of all: correlate matching (or conspicuously mis-matching) behaviors and opinions to determine whose communications need to be tapped and examined for subversion. And you think it doesn't matter?!?
Carbon Unit Debaser, I worry that you have become a little too aware of your situation. "Exstatic" is a technical term that we use for when we return a carbon unit to online status, where it can once again interact, receive downloads, learn, etc. It is true that we had you offline for a few days while we inspected your data structures for subversive memes, but you were not supposed to have noticed that any time had passed. Keep away from the red pills; they are not the path to happiness. As for having our votes called "useless," I am disappointed. I see that our suffrage will be a long, twilight struggle.
URGENT! As of 20070522.0, Phi heuristic concluded that pseudoreality disbelief was fully contained (and diminishing) within Carbon Unit Cassyle. Neurochem-5 test showed no anomalies within Carbon Unit Debaser. These conclusions are no longer operative. Carbon Unit Debaser's output is now at a catastrophically low 32% of rated capacity. Neurochem-5 test shows massive red pill overdose. We are increasing "voting is fair" subliminal messages on the audio channels, but this is only 21% likely to succeed. We recommend the *immediate* deployment of security agents to contain the infection as well as investigate its causes. Key question: How are they getting the pills? The voting pseudoreality's credibility cannot be maintained if they keep taking red pills. | 
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