The Day I Bought an Ostrich Egg
It was a Wednesday. As Circulation Manager I occasionally cover the routes of absent drivers, and this particular week I drove down Isleta Blvd. to Los Lunas. Knowing that a friend's birthday party was that night, I determined to keep an eye peeled for the kind of unique weirdness one finds while delivering the Alibi.
Almost immediately, the perfect gift jumped out at me from a sign in front of a bait shop: ostrich eggs. Who wouldn't want an ostrich egg?
My partner and I went in and asked to see one. As we were waiting we asked how many ostriches the guy had. Just one. I wanted to know if they were mean. Only the males. In fact, he said, the female behind the store was so mellow, the guy could pet her and lead her around and such. He went on to explain that as long as he keeps her happy, she'll lay an egg every two days! Without a male to give her attention, this state of well being is achieved first with a back massage and then the insertion of a length of pvc pipe into... you get the picture. Twenty dollars later, we walked out with our own ostrich egg, which could feed at least 6 people.
The egg was a hit at the party, but unfortunately no one seemed to have time to drain and cook the damn thing. A week later it was ultimately returned to ME, and I have now brought it to the Alibi kitchen in hopes someone else will adopt it/eat it.