.... Actually, you may be judged by your smell as this can be a primary indicator of intoxication. Or you just worked a shift behind the bar at Anodyne where a girl's hair, thanks to the high reach up to the bottles shelf—oh, nice ass, too—can end up more combustible than that orgy in Satyricon. This will make you appear drunk when really you smell like alcohol because it was dripping all over your hair every time someone ordered a fucking top-shelf Rum and Coke.
As always, the authoritIes want you to know the general neighborhood where the checkpoint will be however, Weekly Alibi cannot divulge the exact location. Somewhere in the vicinity of Walmart on San Mateo and the Long John Sliver's on Central APD will be conducting a sobriety checkpoint.
Avoid the cuffs and take advantage of the ever-increasing stable of ride services. By simply starting your night with a ride from one of Albuquerque's taxi services or, if you're under thirty, Uber. Unfortunately, AAA's Tipsy Tow service appears to have been discontinued in Albuquerque, but Albuquerque Cab does offer a free ride home (10pm-2am, Fri & Sat) through their Tavern Taxi service.
Tavern Taxi: (505)-999-1400
ABQ CAB: (505)-883-4888
Yellow/Checker Cab: (505)-247-8888
Green Cab: (505)-243-6800
It’s 2016 and Charlotte Rampling doesn’t remember the decade she’s in and the purpose behind the Oscars boycott.
1-800-Hotline Savesies. This has been a PSA brought to you by the Philly Police Department.
Catch me being excited for the Super Bowl commercials rather than the Super Bowl itself.
New Mexico may soon have two different driver's licenses in order to comply with the Federal Real ID law.
Albuquerque may purchase land adjoining the Petroglyph National Monument in an effort to thwart development near the ancient site.
A local teen with Down Syndrome was robbed of his tablets, computer and other electronics he uses for school and to communicate with others.
Here is Stephen Hawking's list of top ways humans will destroy themselves and the planet.
Experts agree Sarah Palin must be the surprise guest at a Trump rally today.
North Korea claims to have invented booze that won't give one a hangover.
Bro, don't call him "pharma bro" anymore, bro.
Obama declares a State of Emergency for Flint, Michigan because of the contaminated water supply.
Parliament is currently debating whether or not to ban Trump from entering the UK.
A children’s book is pulled from Scholastic after negative feedback about the depiction of slavery.
The first flowering plant bloomed in space over the weekend.
Ladder Ranch was denied a permit to raise and release Mexican Grey Wolves.
Isleta Pueblo just got back more of their ancestral land.
41 percent of the women who come across our state line for abortion-services are coming from Texas.
APD is searching for a man suspected in a shooting last night.
The Berry administration is making good on a 5 year old promise to raise pay for police officers.
An APD officer criticized by the DOJ is suing for back pay and a promotion.
The New York Daily News has no chill towards Ted Cruz.
But did Sean Penn really think meeting El Chapo would have a good outcome?
David Bowie may have passed but his spirit is definitely kept alive and it warms my heart.
The major rebuild of the eastbound I-40 Louisiana Blvd. off-ramp began last night and will be affecting traffic on I-40 and Louisiana Blvd. through June 2016.
Some folks are raising awareness of oil exploration plans in Rio Rancho.
Donald Trump's latest twitter dispute is with Tavis Smiley, who is asking the media to start asking why Trump is so popular rather than simply marveling at Trump's popularity.
Music and culture critic Robert Christgau writes about 6 things Bowie did in the '70s that changed music and culture.
The Free Range Kids movement is celebrating a new federal law that allows kids to walk to school at whatever age parents feel is appropriate.
World's most (in)famous county clerk, Kim Davis, will be attending the State of the Union address tonight.
You could be the proud owner of Anton LaVey's drawing of a "typical '70s male" if you have the economic might to win the eBay auction.
Didn’t catch the Golden Globes last night? Here are the best and worst moments so you don’t feel left out of the office gossip.
Someone did the math and broke down when it actually pays to play the lottery.
The elephants of Ringling circus are retiring, and going where all good retirees go: Florida.
Want a little less public and a little more private PDA in Times Square? This February you can.
Yesterday was No Pants Subway Ride, and more than 60 cities around the world participated.
The REAL ID can got kicked further down the street, at least for airports.
The city is asking for comment on where the new trail should run. If and how wide are already decided, so stifle those complaints.
New Mexico's less shitty teen pregnancy rate isn't reflected in rural communities.
Insurance companies failing to pay the Department of Health for vaccines has doctors turning away patients.
An Oklahoma company is pushing for a zoning exemption to begin drilling for oil in Rio Rancho.
Arizona and the US Department of the Interior are making plans for a diversion of the Gila river that threatens its ecology.
Babe I love you, but I'm a T-Rex
Holly Holm is like that ex-girlfriend who wants to keep your stuff after a breakup so you’ll keep coming back.
I’m just going to casually drain my bank account buying powerball tickets and regret my prior life choices when I don’t win.