The Daily Word in Drunk Cats, Unfunny Clowns and Little Hands

The Daily Word

My love of bad taste is legendary in these parts, which is why I've been dying to see Jerry Lewis' super secret holocaust movie, The Day the Clown Cried, wherein a German clown leads Jewish children to the gas chambers. Hiyo! Lewis gave the film to the Library of Congress under condition that it not be shown until 2024. Other than short glimpses here and there (and a live staging of the script by Patton Oswald), not many have seen this poorly planned work, but thanks to internet, 30 full minutes have surfaced. Enjoy!

Using neural stem cells, scientists have shown that an aged hippocampus will accept transplanted brain stem cells. That means age-related brain degeneration can probably be reversed. And the stem cells needed might be feasibly harvested from skin cells. This is fucking nuts!

After six months in the International Space Station, three astronauts safely landed back on earth yesterday. British astronaut Tim Peake told reporters, "Best ride I’ve been on ever.”

Just when you thought cat owners couldn't seem lonelier: here comes cat wine! There's no alcohol in this fine feline beverage, just catnip, beet juice and a sad longing for human companionship. At least you don't have to get drunk by yourself anymore.

Yes. Americans Against Insecure Billionaires with Tiny Hands, a sexy new Anti-Trump PAC released their first ad last Wednesday, finally asking the question, "Just how big are Trump's hands, and can such a small-handed man really run a country?"

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