Move Your Ass

The moving sidewalk is for moving

The moving sidewalk is a device designed to assist in getting there faster, not aid in laziness. Inconveniently, an alarming amount of humans choose to use the moving sidewalk for standing and ass-growing. Here's an example from just yesterday at the Denver airport. Nice outfit and perm, lady! Unless disabled, visibly winded, with child or with heavy, heavy duffel bag, the next moving sidewalk stander I wait behind is getting paper cut with my boarding pass (or perhaps an elbow in the fleshy gut). The airport. Is annoying enough. As it is.