The state's medical cannabis program is gaining momentum by the hour, it seems. At last count, the number of patients enrolled is a staggering 44,400 people (or 2.13 percent of the population). And that means dispensaries are finally starting to open up in even the furthest reaches of town.
One of the freshest kids on the block is Mother Earth Herbs, right off North I-25 in a welcoming and sedated office park. It just opened over the summer, and already it seems to have a number of dedicated customers. I heard about it from a breathless convert who looked like he'd just found out the truth about Columbus when I told him I'd missed it (he was an asshole—Columbus, I mean).
In the bright waiting room, I ran into another fan of the place who was so excited to be there on a sale day that she had to tell somebody. I was there, so I heard all about how this was the only place she goes to. “This weed is the bomb,” she said. “I'm a connoisseur. I know what I'm talking about.”
“Um,” I said.
The whole store had an open design, and most of the walls were just panes of glass. From the waiting room, I could see directly into the showroom, where I counted over 20 different strains for sell—one of the biggest selections in town. Glancing over the menu, I only recognized a few of the names. Most sounded like exotic blends of some of my favorite strains.
I was sent in with the connoisseur, who raised her eyebrows when we made eye contact over some of the bud displays with a silent, “I told you so.” She was right. The little pods with display flowers crowded a table with a wide variety of very different looking buds. The budtenders were patient as I picked through the choices, asking questions about specific strain combinations (all of which were answered in a flash and without any noticeable aid).
I settled on Deez OG (THC: 19.68%, CBD: Unlisted—$12/gram) and Cookies N Chem (THC: 23.52%, CBD: 0.02%—$12/gram). After the short trip home, I was anxious to dig in and see how the buds looked under closer inspection.
The first strain I loaded into the pipe was Deez OG, a sativa-dominant that smelled bright and fruity. It had a nice coating of sugary trichomes and I noted that the buds had been hand-trimmed, a practice I'm finding more common among the newer crowd. The hits were sweet and went down smoothly with little to no throat irritation. The strain's mood-enhancing effects were quickly noticeable, bringing on a sense of euphoria and well-being. As with any sativa worth its salt, my mind remained clear, but relaxed and open.
After some time enjoying the general goofiness I was experiencing, I rolled a joint of Cookies N Chem, a cross between Girl Scout Cookies and Chemdawg. GSC is one of my favorite strains, and I love all the different hybrids I've found over the last year or so. Mother Earth Herbs surprised me by carrying three different hybrids in all, which made choosing one hard as hell. I settled on the Chem because Chemdawg has been a consistently potent strain in all its iterations I've smoked.
Cookies N Chem smelled earthy and pungent. The flower was sticky and glittered. It tasted like diesel on the way in and like sweet cookies on the way out. It was such a sensual pleasure that I would have been happy with that alone, but I was in for much more. The heady indica side of this hybrid hit like a ton of bricks and had me relaxed and lolling on the couch within minutes. It would be the perfect strain for those suffering from anxiety or general muscle tension. The effects weren't overwhelming, though, and I wasn't suffering from the yawns. In fact, despite the general sedation felt in my body, my brain remained sharp and aware. This was possibly my favorite Cookies hybrid to date. (If you can't tell, this hardened veteran was impressed.)
I binge-watched “Big Mouth” until I was at baseline again and packed a bowl with both strains. I'll let you in on a little secret, dear reader: Real pros mix and match their bowls to perfect the results. Mixing those two was a real corker. I'd like to describe it in better detail, but instead of taking notes like I usually do, I ended up ditching the apartment to wander around a nearby neighborhood while the sun went down earlier than it should. I wondered where the summer had gone and headed back for a second round.