Alibi V.15 No.17 • April 27-May 3, 2006

Ellie Seelow

Executive Chef, Two Fools Tavern

Chef's Recipe: Two Fools Tavern Scotch Eggs

feature

A Clean, Mean, Crawling Machine

Everything you need to know about Spring Crawl

Welcome to the Weekly Alibi's 2006 Spring Crawl! We've spent the last seven years massaging this musical behemoth into the fine beast you see today: 100-or-so local and national acts, all crammed into one night and scattered throughout the Downtown area. We call it "crawling," and it's never been easier. Buy one flat-rate wristband ($10 in advance, $15 day of show) and you'll gain access to six hours of incredibly diverse live performances this Saturday, April 29. Happy crawling!

Crawlers’ druthers

Navigate the massive mess of music with these local fans

So many bands, so little time. There’s a trick to finding your way through tons of great options. You could check out bands you haven’t seen before, seeking the thrill of a great find. You could follow your old favorites through the night. Either way, if you plan ahead, like these band lovers did, you’ll maximize the music in your crawl night. Go ahead, dream up a lineup.

Where to buy tickets

Advance tickets are now available on our website (click here) or in person at all Ticket Master locations and Natural Sound in Nob Hill. Advance tickets are only $10 (plus tax and/or fees) vs. $15 on the day of.

music

Music to Your Ears

Pre-Crawl Warm-up--The two bands created by this year's Edge Ultimate Band Contest (Blind Dryve and Possess and Conceal) will take to the Launchpad stage on Friday for a deciding head-to-head rock-off. Prizes for the winning act include a guaranteed slot at Spring Crawl the following evening. Needless to say, we didn't know which band that would be when we went to press, so we included them both in this week's Spring Crawl feature. May the best band win! Doors open at 6 p.m.

Spring Crawl Headliners Stereotyperider and Guttermouth

National acts at the Crawl

Guttermouth

In grade school, there were always kids that mother and father felt it was best I try to avoid if at all possible. Perhaps if I had not heeded their well-intentioned advice, I would be headlining Spring Crawl. At any rate, I’m not, and Guttermouth is, and that’s probably for the best. These foul-mouthed punks from Huntington Beach, Calif., are not about to stop offending anyone anytime soon. Their latest release, Eat Your Face, features a song in which front man Mark Adkins vividly describes a case of bestiality involving his mother and an all-too-eager donkey.

Flyer on the Wall

Self vs. Grey, Wake & Def and God Sent perform an all-ages show on Friday, April 28, at Warehouse 21 in Santa Fe (1614 Paseo de Peralta). $5. (LM)

The 88

with Matt Costa and Lowlights

Monday, May 1, Launchpad (21-and-over); $7: For those of us who just can't stop riding around on sunny summer days with friendly mod jams in the tape deck, The 88 is the next quencher. Hollywood is loving their grainy, under-produced '60s-esque albums, too. In addition to blowing though our chunk of desert, The 88 has landed a role on the sitcom How I Met Your Mother (the episode is titled "Best Prom Ever") one week after hitting the Launchy stage.

Flyleaf

with Dropping Daylight and Resident Hero

Tuesday, May 2, Launchpad (21-and-over); $12 and $14: When it comes to earnest hurt, Flyleaf pulls it off. Sure, lyrics rub elbows with notebook-margin cliché, but the hooks are golden and the riffs inspired. Singer Lacey Mosley is what everyone's talking about, with her particularly well-sung combo of fragile and fierce. She's fond of those brittle jumps you hear from the likes of Sarah McLachlan. Mosley sings a pain pileup, with a side of atmospheric guitar and rumbling drums. The message is survival, or what they're calling "heavy positivism."

Son Volt and Drive-By Truckers with Curt Kirkwood

"There's a lot of people driving more than four hours to come see this show," says Neal Copperman of AMP Concerts. As soon as it was announced, people started writing to him, asking about tickets from Arizona and Colorado. In a town where alternative bands with an older following often don't get the attention they deserve, that kind of enthusiasm is contagious.

art

Culture Shock

Laff It Up—Russ Meyer, owner of Laffs Comedy Club (6001 San Mateo NE, Suite C-1), will headline his own club on Wednesday, May 3. I'm told he's a very funny man. Show starts at 8:30 p.m. As an added bonus, Wednesdays are College and Military ID Night. Flash one ID and your whole party gets in for free. Even if you aren't a college student or a soldier, admission is only $6. If you could put a price on laughter, which you can't, six bucks would still be a steal. For details, got to www.laffscomedy.com or call 296-JOKE (5653).

In Through the Out Door

The Annual Graduate Art Exhibit at the Jonson Gallery

Here's a tip for you: It's generally more convenient to enter the Jonson Gallery through the back door than the front. See, the parking lot is in the back, and although the back doorway looks like some sort of decrepit servants' entrance, if you ring the bell, someone will invariably let you in.

Morena Amoora

National Hispanic Cultural Center

First staged at the Women’s Festival in Hulon, Israel, Morena Amoora has since been performed at major dance festivals all over the world. An innovative mix of Middle Eastern and flamenco dance, this beautiful performance is designed to create a cross-cultural bridge of understanding and friendship between the Spanish, Jewish and Arab communities. With this goal in mind, a portion of proceeds will help support the mission of the New Mexico Holocaust and Intolerance Museum. (The Alibi's next-door neighbor!) Morena Amoora is only showing for a single evening on Sunday, April 30, at 7 p.m. Tickets are a bargain at $15, $20 and $25. Don't miss this show. 724-4471, www.ticketmaster.com.

news

A New Era

The demolition and rebuilding of one of the hottest all-ages venues in the state, along with the renovation of Santa Fe's railyard, could mean big things for youth, local music and the link between two cities

An entire generation was raised within its walls. And all around, there lay markers of its history: a floor hand-painted with black-and-white checkers, a toilet seat adorned with band stickers, the railyard structure's shack-like exterior. The building has taken on the personality of the generation it helped raise over the past 10 years, but its life must soon come to an end—yet Warehouse 21 is not demolished.

Thin Line

Dinosaur Stirs—The ground cracks. Pebbles and dirt clods cascade. The camera work gets all shaky. And from the earth emerges that bunch of bones, that echo of an eon gone by. It's ... the Albuquerque Journal's website, waking slowly to the fact that it was possibly the last newspaper site in the United States to charge for its content.

Preview of Coming Attractions

Items on the short April 17 City Council agenda were deferred or withdrawn except for passage of a water authority bill and approval of a 20-unit condominium on South Broadway and a contract with H.D.R. Engineering for design work on a streetcar-light rail system. But two upcoming bills sent arguments echoing through the chamber.

Do the Math

Albuquerque’s uninsured draw national attention

Vivian Hairston has four children, one husband, one small business and four employees. In New Mexico, that’s more than a palindrome—it’s an equation that, oftentimes, leads to zero health insurance.

We're in the Money

Albuquerque sets a new minimum wage

After three previous attempts failed, City Council President Martin Heinrich crafted a compromise minimum wage bill debated at an April 20 special Council meeting. The current bill phases in the $7.50 wage over three years, includes all employers and limits legal actions against employers. A deal was struck between the Council and city administration before the meeting, but all sides restated their arguments, however solid or shaky.

Battleship APS

Charter schools can offer innovative ideas, but only if APS pays attention

I recently visited one of the five original Albuquerque charter high schools, the Public Academy for the Performing Arts (PAPA). Together with Amy Biehl, Southwest Secondary Learning, South Valley Academy and Twenty First Century Charter High School, PAPA was granted a charter eight years ago and greeted its first students a year later.

Odds & Ends

Dateline: Malaysia—According to the New Straits Times, a man by the name of Yahaya Wahab nearly fainted when he received a $218 trillion phone bill and was ordered to pay up in 10 days or face prosecution. Yahaya told the newspaper he disconnected his late father’s phone line in January after he died and settled the 84 ringgit ($23) bill. But Telekom Malaysia later sent him a 806,400,000,000,000.01 ringgit ($218 trillion) bill for recent telephone calls along with the order to settle within 10 days or face legal proceedings. It wasn’t clear if the bill was a mistake or if Yahaya’s father’s phone line was used illegally after his death. “If the company wants to seek legal action as mentioned in the letter, I’m ready to face it,” the paper quoted Yahaya as saying. “In fact, I can’t wait to face it.” A company official from Telekom Malaysia, who declined to be identified, said the company was aware of Yahaya’s case and would address it.

Catch the Bird!

A sneak peek at the Rail Runner

It's almost pathetic, really, how excited I was about riding the Rail Runner. I called my mom to tell her the good news, as if I had just won the lottery or was nominated for a Pulitzer Prize. No, it was nothing as lucky as that. The invitation came in the form of a press release, advertising a photo op/public relations event—and my chance to get on the train.

film

Reel World

Moving Movies—On Friday, April 28, at 8 p.m. the Readymade Dance Theater Studio (4011 Silver SE) will present a one-night opportunity to view two cutting-edge dance films—“Imposters” by Albuquerque-based PutAttention Dance Collective and “Back to Kinshasa” by Parisian director Luli Barzman. “Imposters” is an experimental video that probes the PutAttention Collective’s “dance response” to Albuquerque’s developing Westside. “Back to Kinshasa” is a profile of Congo-born, Paris-based choreographer/dancer Faustin Linyekula. The films run approximately 50 min. Tickets are $5 general admission. Seating is limited.

Akeelah and the Bee

Stand-up-and-cheer drama spells success

Hollywood is in the midst of a certified spelling bee craze thanks to films like Spellbound and ... well, Bee Season. That’s not what you’d call a tidal wave of films exactly, but it only took Volcano and Dante’s Peak for 1997 to be labeled “The Year of the Volcano.” In 1998, Deep Impact and Armageddon made it “The Year of the Asteroid.” So, two films about a subject as obscure and seemingly uncinematic as spelling bees is impressive. Now comes yet another film, Akeelah and the Bee, set in the cutthroat world of middle school spelling bees. Three films? Get out of the way, people! It’s a tsunami!

Silent Hill

What the Hell?

Silent Hill is either a work of total genius or a complete piece of crap. Honestly, I can’t decide.

Cold Turkey

TV Turnoff Week 2006

Are you watching TV this week? Well, you’re not supposed to be. At least according to the organizers of the annual TV Turnoff Week, taking place April 24-30. They say no TV news, no “Tonight Show with Jay Leno,” no “Desperate Housewives,” no “Married ... With Children” reruns for a full week. Are they insane?

food

Catching Up with Tom White of Two Fools Tavern

The founding owner of Scalo and Il Vicino tries his hand at an Irish pub concept in Nob Hill

Your career in the New Mexico restaurant community has been going on for close to 25 years now. How did you get started?

Bite

Do you know of any Salvadoran restaurants in the Albuquerque/Santa Fe area?--A reader posed the question to me last week, and I was stumped. "I'm jonesing for a pupusa [fried pork-and-cheese-stuffed corn tortillas] and heard there is a restaurant here," he said, "[but] I just can't seem to find it anywhere." Former Alibi Food Editor Gwyn Doland says she's heard similar rumors, but can't put a trace on one either. So I'm turning to you, our voracious readers. Have you heard of a place that serves Salvadoran cuisine? The best advice will be rewarded with coupons good for a night on the town in Albuquerque, and I'll publish your findings right here in the paper. In the meantime, here's a tasty morsel to motivate your search.

Chopstix

The fish soup is sssmmokin’

There are a million Chinese food restaurants in Albuquerque. OK, maybe not quite a million, but definitely a multitude. What sets one apart from the herd? Ho Ho has a rep for being über cheap (you could buy the entire place for $10), Chow’s is in business with the white tablecloth treatment and China Star has the biggest pile of cold shrimp I’ve ever peeled into. This leaves a few categories open for the taking, such as best background cricket noises and best place to get stewed chicken feet.

Alibi V.15 No.16 • April 20-26, 2006

¡Ask a Mexican! Glossary


Bienvenidos to ¡Ask a Mexican!, the world’s foremost authority on America’s favorite beaners! The Mexican can answer any and every question on his race, from why Mexicans stick the Virgin of Guadalupe everywhere to our obsession with dwarves and transvestites. In the course of his answers, The Mexican will use certain terms and phrases for better-rounded answers. Here are the most-used.

feature

Losing It

An inside look at Albuquerque's mental health emergency

Ruth was in the Navy. She was a damage control firefighter. When she began her service in 1995, she was 26. Things were good.

news

The Forgotten Continent

An interview with Paul Rusesabagina, the man behind Hotel Rwanda

“Those 100 days were started somewhere, were started by someone, and never ended, because the killings never ended.”

Food for Thought

Could international restaurants be the answer to cosmopolitan bliss?

I don't know about you, but I'm a guy who likes food. In fact, I have to say that next to napping, food is one of my favorite things. Thankfully, in New Mexico, food is part of our identity. Show me a guy without a red chile stain on his shirt, and I will show you a guy without a shirt.

Manliness at City Hall

The minimum wage, jail and public education

There's a new book out in defense of manliness. It's got the commentators all atwitter with its premise, which is that, as a nation, we are making a huge mistake by downplaying the importance of those classic hunter-gatherer virtues, such as decisiveness, bravery, courage under fire ... and volume.

Thin Line

Village Idiot—[CORRECTION: Some alternative weeklies in the Village Voice Media chain (formerly the New Times chain) do in fact have media criticism columns. An incorrect statement about this has been removed from this article. The error was made by the columnist. Apologies all around.] Management changes are always difficult, especially when some wunderkind's shadow darkens the door, towing with him ideas about how things should be done at your Pulitzer-winning alt weekly. That's what Democracy Now! is calling a "shakeup" at the Village Voice.

Sport and Spectacle

Albuquerque's roller derby squads roll out a full season, skating faster, hitting harder and thinking strategy

For Kamikaze Kim, team captain of Duke City Derby's Doomsdames, the hitting was the hardest part.

Odds & Ends

Dateline: Germany—A German man has taken legal action against the Easter Bunny for grievous bodily harm. Eccentric Berlin-based performance artist Karl-Friedrich Lentze--who also sued the Pope, filed a patent for straight bananas and tried to open a restaurant serving breast milk cakes--has filed a complaint with prosecutors, accusing the holiday icon of causing addiction to chocolate which leads to heart attacks, obesity and strokes. “The Easter Bunny is a sadistic and unscrupulous offender who preys on people's sweet tooth,” said Lentze in a public statement. “Find this evil bunny, handcuff his paws and remove him from shops in time for Easter.” Public prosecutor spokesperson Christian Avenarius said, “We will act upon this complaint with speed and diligence.” Despite the pledge, it is believed that Lentze's latest campaign will meet with as much success as his petition to ban Santa Claus.

film

Reel World

Casting the Coens—There will be an open casting call for the new Coen brothers film No Country for Old Men this Sunday, April 23, at the Student Center Ballroom on the Highlands University Campus in Las Vegas from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. The Coen brothers (makers of such fine entertainment as Fargo, The Big Lebowski and Raising Arizona) will shoot the film in Las Vegas, Santa Fe and Albuquerque beginning on May 24. Casting directors are looking for strong characters, including bikers, Native American, Hispanic and Anglo. The casting call will also be on the lookout for cars built before 1980 (the year in which the film is set). No Country for Old Men is based on the recently published novel of the same name by Cormac McCarthy and concerns a rural sheriff hunting for a suitcase full of money and a demented killer. If you go, be sure and tell Joel and Ethan that The Dude sent you.

Movies Without Borders

The Sin Fronteras Film Festival

The Sin Fronteras Film Festival was started four years ago by SOLAS, the University of New Mexico's Latin American Studies group. “The festival was pretty small and mostly focused on sociopolitical concerns,” admits Dorothy Baca, who has signed on this year as the festival's new director. Baca, who also serves as director for the Arts of the Americas Institute at UNM's College of Fine Arts, hopes 2006 will be a breakout year for the festival, reaching out of the campus and into the community.

Bullrider

Competent documentary offers cowboys for Christ

For me, professional bull riding ranks somewhere between Olympic curling and women's billiards on the list of all-time favorite sports. In fact, like people who only go to church on Christmas, I'm one of those people who really only watches sports on Super Bowl Sunday. So, it's pretty safe to say that the new documentary Bullrider is not aimed at me.

The Seventh Wheel

“What About Brian?”

Despite a number of extremely popular TV series, ABC is proceeding with the sort of reckless abandon of a third-place network. Their new fall schedule is crammed with new shows, and mere weeks away from May Sweeps network executives are still running premieres. Earlier this week, for example, ABC unveiled the newest effort from overachiever J.J. Abrams (who, in addition to cranking out “Lost” and the recently returned “Alias,” is also directing the latest installment of the Mission: Impossible series).

music

Music to Your Ears

FHM CD Release Party--Fast Heart Mart bring their street performance aesthetic and a brand-new album to Harlow's (NE corner of Central and Carlisle) on Friday, April 21. This show will be the official jumping off for An Orange Album, the lightning-quick follow-up to the group's 2005 The Red Record.

The Magic of Ben McIver

Saxophonist opens Saturday Night Jazz Series at Seasons

Native son Ben McIver needs to perform more often. Not because he needs the practice, though he might tell you otherwise. Not because he's an excellent player, though he is. But so we can hear more of his elegant jazz compositions eloquently played.

Flyer on the Wall

Requiem Mass, Tetelesti, The Ground Beneath, Suspended, Torture Victim, Aphotic Blitz and Natural Reaction provide the soundtrack to the best free barbecue of the season at The Zone Smokeshop (2505 San Mateo, just south of Menaul). Plus, they're giving discounts to people with this flyer, so take a copy of the Alibi with you and score some incense on the cheap. Saturday (which is actually 4/22) at noon. (LM)

Time and Again Barelas

An opera of unending ardor debuts

Thursday, April 20, at the Roy Disney Center for the Performing Arts in the NHCC; Friday, April 21, and Saturday, April 22, at Popejoy Hall: It's a love story that lasts five centuries. But don't pitch it that way if you're trying to get friends to go see it with you.

The Nerds Rock Inferno

with Bible of the Devil and Black Maria

Tuesday, April 25, Burt's Tiki Lounge (21-and-over); Free: As a pretty genuine, bona fide nerd, I can honestly say that these so-called “nerds” that make up The Nerds Rock Inferno scare the shit out of me. These aren't the type of nerds who internalize or bottle up their anger. Instead, one too many kicks to the groin via the high school quarterback have sent these comely Italian rockers into a rage-fueled fit of destruction. The Nerds work within a genre that could be defined as hardcore rabble rock that's fast, hard, dirty and not for your average malcontented spectacle wearer. Initial impressions of the band paint a picture of a somewhat chaotic mess of fast chord changes and barely audible screaming. There is, however, method to these nerds' madness. The complex layering and other intricacies can almost catch you off guard because of the Nerds' canaille musical persona. This is the only band I've heard that probably appeals to Rush and Cannibal Corpse fans equally.

Remembering Ryan King

Local musician leaves behind a legacy of stellar musicianship and genuine passion

On Monday, April 10, Albuquerque lost a valued member of its music community. Ryan King, bassist for the Cowpunk outfit Swingin' Meat and ex-member of the infamous local punk ensemble Beefcake in Chains died at the young age of 34.

art

Culture Shock

Day of the Book—Homosexuals have Gay Pride Day. Groundhogs have Groundhog's Day. Daylight has Daylight Savings Day. And books? Books have UNESCO's World Book Day, an international celebration of all bookish things. Here in Albuquerque, we're celebrating Sunday, April 23, with a reading by three local poets—Patricia Clark Smith, E.A. (Tony) Mares and Diane Thiel—at Alfredo's Coffee House (2104 Charlevoix SE) in Old Town. The event takes place from 3 to 5 p.m. According to the organizers, on this day, by custom, adults are asked to donate a book to a young person. Bring a book to the event, and it will be donated to Dolores Gonzales Elementary School and Washington Middle School for use in classes. For more information, call 266-0262 or go to www.abqreadfest.com.

It's More Than Art on These Walls

It might not be an art gallery by name, but it has the same spirit. Nearly every wall of the UNM Mental Health Center is adorned with colorful paintings and portraits—all finely framed and signed by the artists. Each piece has its own unique story of how it came to be on these walls. Some were donated by past and present patients. Some were commissioned. One has been hanging on the back wall for as long as anyone can remember. A particularly striking impressionistic rendering of Vincent van Gogh standing under an umbrella brightens a dark hall on the second floor—a portrait of a man with whom many artists in the mental health community identify.

Orion Weiss

Simms Performing Arts Center

Orion Weiss is only 24-years-old, but he's already making a deep mark in the classical music world, showing a maturity in his performances way beyond his years. Chamber Music Albuquerque is bringing Weiss to town for its second annual Ralph Berkowitz Concert. The performance will take place on Sunday, April 23, at 3 p.m. in Albuquerque Academy's Simms Performing Arts Center (6400 Wyoming NE). A free concert lecture will occur at 2 p.m. Tickets range from $17 to $35. Student tickets are half price. They're available online at www.cma-abq.org or by calling 268-1990.

Mr. Smith Comes to Albuquerque

An interview with Marc Smith

According to legend, back in the mid '80s, poet Marc Kelly Smith was working as a construction worker in Chicago when he put together the world's first poetry slam at the Gin Mill Lounge. The idea was to pump some juice into staid traditional readings, give some emphasis to performance and stage presence, and throw a little good-natured competition into the mix.

9 Mile: Rusta Goes the Extra Mile

Gorilla Tango Theatre

Rusta Rhymes is back! Rusty Rutherford—he of How to Pick Up Chicks fame—will be busting out a new hip-hop comedy performance at Gorilla Tango (519 Central NW) this weekend, directed by Kevin R. Elder. Runs Fridays and Saturdays at 8:30 p.m. through April 29. There'll be a special late night performance on the final night at 10:30 p.m. Tickets are $10. If you haven't seen this pint-sized, smooth-talkin' ladies' man in action before, you really need to get on it. Might want to leave your girlfriend at home, though, because the masculine lure of Rusta might just be too much for her to handle. 245-8600.

food

All the News That's Fit to Eat

Lights Out for Marta?--It seems Marta's Camino Real, a plucky and thoroughly delicious New Mexican spot in the UNM area, has closed. The restaurant has gone dark in the last few weeks and the phone is disconnected. How sad. If you know what happened, please drop me a line.

The Green Light Bistro

Forget the meat, eat a beet

I can only imagine the delight shared by the earliest humans upon discovering that vegetables were not only edible, but delicious. They may have been out hunting their requisite wooly meat beast when one of them pointed to the ground, and all crowded around, admiring a fat, juicy carrot, or maybe a leafy bunch of spinach. The brave one put it in his mouth, chewed for a minute and then screamed for joy. Food also grew from the ground, and thus began our evolution into the salad-eating, broccoli-loving, bell-peppered existence that we know and cherish today.

Alibi V.15 No.15 • April 13-19, 2006

feature

A Long Line in the Sand

Mexican perspectives on Mexican immigration to the U.S.

Of all people, New Mexicans should understand that borders aren't simply about physical boundaries of land and territory; they're also about people and cultures that can shift and change. In the past few weeks, massive pro-immigrant rallies have forced the U.S. to publicly address the growing cultural and economic contributions of peoples from countries south of our border.

Estela Peñaloza

Estela stands beside her washer and dryer and tells a group of American students the story of her family. Her cinderblock home hugs the side of a ravine in Cuernavaca, Mexico. The group sits in one room of the tiny home, under a corrugated plastic roof. Four beds, a couch, a refrigerator, a small stove, boxes, a TV and a stereo crowd the upper level of the room. Estela stands on the level below. Behind a curtain is a bathroom with a barrel of water for pouring down the toilet. On the walls are two guitars, a tennis racquet, a plastic NFL clock and a crucifix with a white Jesus.

Ofelia Laureano

Ofelia Laureano was born in a rural village in the state of Puebla where her parents were farmers. The family was poor, and her parents had trouble supporting all their children. Every day, the family ate tortillas and beans. Ofelia took care of the younger children while her siblings worked in the field.

news

The Path to a Cure

UNM researchers are on the forefront of a vaccine that could end cervical cancer

It's the culmination of a lifetime of work for University of New Mexico professor Cosette Wheeler, and it could be the largest development in women's health since the advent of the birth control pill. After studying the Human Papillomavirus (HPV) for two decades, she will likely see a breakthrough vaccine for the virus released to the public this year. The hope is that this vaccine could potentially prevent more than 80 percent of cervical cancer cases.

Making the Wage

An update on the minimum wage

Thanks to a new bill by City Council President Martin Heinrich, a possible minimum-wage hike is on the Council's plate—again. Here are the basics:

“Silver Bullets”

Drunk driving and mental illness need better solutions

The hearts of our local policymakers must brim over with optimism. I can think of no other possible explanation for why they're falling so gullibly for such goofy silver-bullet solutions for complex social problems, such as Kendra's Law and an ordinance requiring the publication of DWI offender photos in newspapers.

Odds & Ends

Dateline: Australia—A naked man may be a little less of a nature lover after suffering burns to one-fifth of his body while trying to set fire to a spider at a nudist resort in New South Wales. The 56-year-old Sydney man tried to kill what he thought was a funnel web spider by pouring gasoline down the spider's burrow and igniting it with a match, CareFlight rescue copter service told the Sydney Morning Herald. Unfortunately, the fuel exploded, burning the man on his upper leg and buttocks. Resort staff treated the man before paramedics arrived. The man was flown by helicopter to Sydney's Concord Hospital, where he was listed in stable condition with burns to 18 percent of his body. Resort guests told emergency crews it was probably a harmless trapdoor spider and not a deadly funnel web. The man's lack of clothing probably contributed to the extent of his burns, the rescue chopper service said.

film

Reel World

Correction--Last week, Reel World ran a crew call for the new low-budget horror film Gimme Skelter, which will be lensed this spring by local moviemakers Exhilarated Despair Productions. Seems they're looking for a reliable makeup effects person willing to get down and dirty with the film's many blood-soaked scenes. The e-mail address we ran, however, was incorrect. If you're interested in showing off your skills alongside such horror legends as Gunnar Hansen (Texas Chainsaw Massacre), you should send your résumé to scott@exhilarateddespair.com.

La Mujer de Mi Hermano

South American drama proves more soapy than sexy

You could say that Zoe and Ignacio Edwards are a happily married couple. Except that they aren't. At least not the “happily” part. After spending a few minutes inside their household, viewers of La Mujer de Mi Hermano will realize that--despite owning a successful factory, having an ultramodern house complete with indoor/outdoor pool and generally looking like a couple of models straight off the pages of GQ--the Edwards have a fairly chilly relationship.

Native Narratives

The 1st Annual Independent Indigenous Film Festival

In many ways, the Guild Cinema is the perfect place to host the Independent Indigenous Film Festival. The word “indigenous” is defined as, “Belonging to a place: originating in and naturally living, growing or occurring in a region or country.” Being the only independent, locally owned movie theater left in Albuquerque, the Guild is a unique belonging of our local arts scene. Would you hold a festival celebrating and fostering indigenous cultural values and identity in a vast megaplex owned by an out-of-state corporation, or would you place it firmly on the screen of a theater that has been living and growing in our city for the last 40 years? ... Yeah, so would the organizers of the 1st Annual Independent Indigenous Film Festival.

Experi-Mental

Bryan Konefsky Presents: “Experiments in Cinema!”

Bryan Konefsky, lecturer in the University of New Mexico's Media Arts Department, vice president of local arts organization Basement Films and self-described “media archeologist,” will be taking over UNM's SouthWest Film Center this weekend to present two days worth of “visionary cinema and un-dependent moving image art.”

Moses Supposes

“The Ten Commandments” on ABC

I'm no Biblical scholar, but I'm pretty sure the 11th Commandment was, “Thou shalt show The Ten Commandments every year on network television on or around Easter Sunday.”

music

Music to Your Ears

Moonshine Champagne—What is this magnetic force that attracts people to banjos, barefeet and overalls? I haven't been able to quite figure out what it is, but you guys can't seem to get enough bluegrass in this city. And now there's a permanent home for the stuff at the Windchime Champagne Gallery (Downtown, just east of Sixth Street on Central). Windchime mastermind G. Larribas says the gallery will host traditional and contemporary bluegrass performances every Wednesday night from here on out, starting with The Duke City Swamp Coolers on April 19. Keep an eye on our “Music Calendar” listings for new acts each week.

Flyer on the Wall

Free show, Friday, April 14, at Warehouse 21 in Santa Fe (1814 Paseo de Peralta, all-ages). The text at the bottom says, “1. Zombie rock. Mothers lock up your daughters. 2. Albuquerque's finest. 3. A behemoth slab of destruction. Members of The Battle's End, Bravura Corvid, The Cherry Tempo, Black Water Flood, etc. 4. Do you like crying? Because they do. 4. Do you like Satan? Debut show.” We totally love you guys. (LM)

Emergenza Festival

Four nights of furious rock ’n' roll battles

The second installment of the Emergenza Festival in Albuquerque returns to the Launchpad this Thursday. With a stellar lineup of local mainstays like Caustic Lye, The Dirty Novels, Hit by a Bus and The Gracchi, you'll stay entertained until “hangover Monday” rears its discombobulated head. What follows is a breakdown of the action intended to give you some idea of what to expect on each of the four nights. Like all good competitions, however, unpredictable scheduling changes are inevitable and it should be noted that the intricacies of all the bands cannot be adequately espoused in the amount of space that this “Show Up” provides. Here, then, is your night-by-night summary of what's to come:

It's Smooth, It's Sweet, It's Vanilla Pop

Vanilla Pop croons over three years at Martini Grille

Here's a common scene: A young man leans against the bar, making a phone call to, let's say, his roommate. He chats for a minute, tells his buddy to come over for a drink and puts the phone away. A simple scene, causing no general hubbub or hilarity—unless it's at the Martini Grille on Wednesday night.

The All-Metal Weekend

at Puccini's Golden West Saloon

Friday, April 14, and Saturday, April 15, Puccini's Golden West Saloon (21-and-over); $5: “Metal lives!,” so sayeth Albuquerque. This city's always been a fan of the genre. It's in Burqueños' teeth, in our bones, and no matter what incarnation it takes on, it outlasts most other rock genres built on chintzy tin and fickle fans.

Sic Alps

Wednesday, April 19, Atomic Cantina (21-and-over); Free: Listening to the Sic Alps is a little like watching a race car with wobbly wheels. It's the precursor to a wreck, but for now, the thing's still traveling.

art

Culture Shock

The Deuce is Wild—I'm going to do you a favor. (I know, I know—I'm very giving. Just thank me and let's move on.) I'd like to suggest a couple especially interesting art shows for you to peruse this weekend. The first is over at Artspace 116 (116 Central SW, Suite 201), which is located Downtown next to the Century 14 movie theater. The exhibit is a 20-year retrospective of work by Ken Saville, a longtime Albuquerque arts fixture who is a “permanent substitute teacher” at an elementary school down in the South Valley.

Love is War

Private Lives at the Cell Theatre and Dangerous at Sol Arts

Intimate human relationships are always a tricky business. Throw a little romance and sex into the mix, and some degree of heartache and pain is almost inevitable. We're built to love, though—most of us, anyway—so there's no sense in whining too much. If we fall flat on our faces, over and over again, we usually have no one to blame but ourselves.

War on the Family

When Francesca Duran got pregnant at the age of 16, an Albuquerque judge decided it was a violation of her recent release from a youth detention center. "I pleaded with the judge," says Duran, now 20, “but to no avail.” Duran, who had already spent ages 12 to 15 behind bars, was sentenced to another two years.

food

All the News That's Fit to Eat

There's been a lot of talk swirling around the Flying Star lately--Confusion over policy enforcement, a new vice president hired on from out-of-state and two enormous locations in the oven (including a proposed adjoined 10,000-square-foot shopping center) are a few of the things you're talking about.

La Fonda del Bosque

Albuquerque's most colorful tastes

I have frequently been given the monumental task of choosing a representative New Mexican restaurant for both out-of-towners and Burque newbies. There are so many places here with so many different types of food and atmospheres, and picking one is akin to choosing a mate: It's important to be careful and conscientious, while being aware that good looks do matter. Lucky for me, my figurative engagement ring just got a big, fat diamond placed in the middle of it in the form of La Fonda del Bosque, the brunch spot of champions located inside the National Hispanic Cultural Center.

The Seder Plate

The first night of Passover falls on Wednesday, April 12, this year. Passover, or Pesach (say “PAY-sahch,” with a "ch" as in the Scottish "loch"), is a ritual feast that commemorates the freedom of the Israelites from ancient Egypt. It's an important time for Jewish folks all over the world, celebrated as a high holiday when family and friends come together to reflect on their collective past ... and, above all, to eat.