Week in Sloth
The Week in Sloth
“The Fashion Show” (Bravo 8 p.m.) Fifteen would-be professional fashion designers meet in a reality show competition where they are judged and voted off each week based on ... I don’t know. Sounds awfully familiar, Bravo.
“Michael J. Fox: Adventures of an Incurable Optimist” (KOAT-7 9:02 p.m.) For a guy with Parkinson’s disease, Michael J. Fox seems pretty cheerful. Who better to travel the globe talking to people, both famous and not, about “the enduring strength of hope”? Also, he interviews doctors and scientists about the nature of optimism. Plus, he visits Bhutan, because ... you know, free trip.
“Dollhouse” (KASA-2 8:01 p.m.) Joss Whedon’s out-of-the-ordinary sci-fi show made it one entire season on FOX. Congratulations, Mr. Whedon. You get a six-disc DVD set for your troubles. Now, will you please peddle your wares to another network? Your fans want more than 12 episodes.
“Jonas” (Disney 9 p.m.) Follow me, here: In this new musical sitcom, the real-life Jonas brothers play the fictional “Lucas” brothers who live in a converted firehouse on “Jonas” street and therefore are members of a (again, fictional) band called “Jonas Brothers.” ... Or something like that. Honestly, I’m not 11, so I’m not entirely sure.
“The Celebrity Apprentice” (KOB-4 7 p.m.) “The Celebrity Apprentice” concludes its season with a three-hour spectacular! ... Yeah, NBC isn’t even trying anymore.
“Angels & Demons Decoded” (History 7 p.m.) Dan Brown’s books are 25 percent historical fact grown in 75 percent total bullshit. Tonight, History Channel goes looking for the 25 percent.
“Meteorite Men” (Science 7 p.m.) This astrophysical special profiles the men (and maybe a few women, though the title doesn’t hold much promise) who travel the globe collecting meteorites in an effort to reveal the secrets of our universe. Also to make a lot of money. Those meteorites are damn expensive.
“Weaponizers” (Discovery 7 p.m.) I question the educational content of this show. But since tonight’s premiere episode involves two regular automobiles being transformed into remote-controlled vehicles capable of destroying each other with machine guns, rockets and other devices, I pretty much have to drool contentedly along with the rest of male America.
“The Biggest Loser” (KOB-4 7 p.m.) Hot on the heels of the three-hour “Celebrity Apprentice” finale comes the three-hour “Biggest Loser” finale. Pretty soon NBC’s prime-time lineup will consist of 40 hours’ worth of Jay Leno on weekdays, followed by six hours of “America’s Got Talent” on weekends. Plus assorted Howie Mandel specials for the holidays. Enjoy.
“The Real Housewives of New Jersey” (Bravo 7 p.m.) Do you grow weary of the catty, cougar-like lives of bored, rich women in Orange County? Atlanta? New York City? How about New Jersey? ... We’ve got West Virginia on the way. That’s a hot one.