Best Haiku About Why You Fear a Specific Species of Farm Animal
By Steven Robert Allen
My vote for scariest farm animal is certainly the goat, yet for whatever reason I'm also oddly attracted to our voracious, horned friends in much the same way churchgoing good girls are attracted to big smelly bikers. Oh, goat, you're soooooo bad. My daddy wouldn't like you at all. Elaine Almquist's goat poem was the best entry in a very competitive category. She wins a $40 certificate to Ralli's and two passes to the Guild Cinema.
Oh God! That donkey
Psycho tom turkey
Two-ton hog cornered
Bad-ass male turkey,
Goats I fear the most
What doesn't he know?
A methane build-up,
A goat chewed off my
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