Are You on Fire?
By Fireman Stan, fire expert
1) Are strangers wrapping blankets around you when you aren’t the least bit cold?
2) When planning activities with friends, do you often find yourself suggesting, “Maybe we should all go jump in a big ol’ lake!”?
3) Do you smell something smoky and delicious?
4) Do you have a No. 1 single, a best-selling novel and a three-picture deal with Paramount?
5) Would death right now be a welcome relief?
If you answered “yes” to one or more of these questions, you might be on fire. Call 911 immediately. But remember, only you can truly know if you’re on fire.
Ryan McGarvey • blues, guitar at Low Spirits
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