The giving of valentines is a carefully nuanced act, one we learn in kindergarten. Valentines, no matter how small or seemingly simplistic, convey a world of implication and sentiment. Matching a valentine's message to its recipient is key, lest you alienate a potential love or invite affection from an unwanted corner—best illustrated by “The Simpsons” episode wherein Lisa's valentine to Ralph, featuring a train and the words “I choo-choo-choose you,” causes poor, paste-eating Ralphie to believe that he's been, well, cho-cho-chosen.
While comic hilarity ensued from this misunderstanding, it’s rarely hilarious in real life. That's why the artists who submitted to the Alibi's sixth annual Valentine's Day Card Contest are to be commended. These weren't generic cards; they were thinking of us as they made them. Slightly creepy? Sure. But don't all great romances start with just a hint of creepiness?
Helping out with judging duties this year were Jessica Cassyle Carr, Christie Chisholm, Marisa Demarco, Jeff Drew, Adam Fox, Molly Lindsay, Laura Marrich, Jeremy McCollum, Simon McCormack and Joel Rogers. First- through fourth-place winners will receive a delightful bundle of date-appropriate gifts, available for pick-up (if not pickup lines) at the front desk of Alibi World Headquarters (413 Central NW) Monday through Friday between 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. As always, thanks for thinking of us.
So what does Gracie Apodaca's “Love Is Like a Revolution” card say about how she feels about us? That we're hungry villagers waiting to be seduced into joining an armed uprising? Was it that obvious? Gracie's soldadera may be packing heat, but it was her slightly intimidating determination that won our hearts. For her efforts, Apodaca will receive two tickets to a performance at the Outpost Performance Space, $50 in Bumble Bee's Bucks, $30 in gift certificates for Sonrisa Blooms and a $10 certificate for a new ’do at Central Park Hair. Not that she needs it; we think she's beautiful just the way she is.
But what does Karl Deuble's valentine reveal about his feelings for us? Some may look at the young cardboard man's tighty whities and bloody stumps and surmise a certain amount of antipathy. But what we see is undying devotion—this man could lose his feet in an unfortunate threshing accident, and he'd still take the time to wish us a Happy Valentine's Day. Our reward to Deuble includes two tickets to a concert at the Outpost Performance Space, $25 in Bumble Bee's Bucks, $20 in gift certificates for Sonrisa Blooms and a $10 certificate to Central Park Hair, which it looks like he could use.
Bambi Doe Blake's entry eschewed revolution and amputation for straight-up whimsy. The folk art heart's detail was charming, and it was one of the few valentines this year to include glitter (in a tiny vial, no less). For her endearingly old-school work, Blake gets two tickets to a show at the Outpost Performance Space, $25 in Bumble Bee's Bucks, a $10 certificate to Louie's Rock-n-Reels and a $10 certificate to Central Park Hair, which again, implies nothing personal about Blake.
Pete Callas hand-delivered his valentine to our front door, perhaps not trusting the postal service with such a package. While we have nothing but respect for the USPS, we don't blame him: This thing is made of stained glass. A valentine of stained glass, replete with a poem, that opens like a book. We like to think of it as a window into his heart. However, such genuine sentiment makes us uncomfortable, so let's move on. Callas receives two tickets to a night at the Outpost Performance Space, $25 in Bumble Bee's Bucks and a $10 gift certificate to Central Park Hair for his attempt to warm our cold, cold hearts.
“Embroidered Heart and Bruce Lee Quote” by Ruth Armijo-Carlson