BOB: Life in Burque
Illo by Rob M
Best City Politician to Get a Pat On the Back
With all the changes coming down the pipe for Downtown this year, it's pretty obvious the mayor is working all the angles to leave his mark. ART is (most likely) going to go down, and upgrades on the plaza and the One Central Entertainment District plan should start this year. ABQ is ready for change, and they've let Berry know it with this hearty slap on the back.
2) Pat Davis
3) Isaac Benton
Best City Politician to Get a Punch in the Nose
Just after enjoying all the heart-warming approval, the mayor is immediately knocked into orbit by the results of our next question. Why does Berry get a pat on the back and a knock to the noggin? Probably for such dumb stunts as vetoing the decriminalization of pot, ignoring residents' concerns over the Bosque trail and not bothering to show up at any ART meetings.
2) Susana Martinez
3) Isaac Benton
Best Citywide/Statewide Scandal
Susana Martinez Pizza Party
Under Martinez' watch, N.M. became the worst-rated state for child poverty. An FBI investigation into one of her top advisers regarding campaign finance activities shriveled. But what scandal are we most interested in? Our governor pulling the “Do you know who I am?” line during a rowdy, drunken pizza party.
2) Diana Duran Embezzlement
3) APD Shooting
Best Use of City Money
Albuquerque Rapid Transit (ART)
Despite the loudly vocal hatred of the rapid transit plan—with its negative impact on local businesses, expensive infrastructural changes and traffic disruptions—our voters still thought ART was the best way for the city to spend their dollars. People obviously want their public transportation.
2) Helping the homeless
3) ABQ BioPark
Best Waste of City Money
Albuquerque Rapid Transit (ART)
Despite the support of the rapid transit plan amongst millennials—with its promises of urban renewal, economic improvement and cultural development—our voters still thought ART was the worst way for the city to spend their dollars. People obviously don't want public transportation.
2) APD Shooting Lawsuits
Best Local Athlete
Holly Holm did the unthinkable last November when she took down then-undefeated women's bantamweight champion Ronda Rousey with a vicious kick to the head—and that was after being the second person to ever push a Rousey fight past the first round—placing her squarely in the Badass Zone. After ABQ declared November “Holly Holm Month,” it's no surprise she took the title for Best Athlete.
2) Carlos Condit
3) Elijah Brown
Best TV News Anchor
In 28 years Tom Joles has seen mayors and governors come and go, watched scandals rise and fall, and seen the city become what it is today—all from the anchorperson's chair at KOB-TV. When it comes to our nightly news, you can't substitute for decades of experience and hard work.
2) Marisa Maez
3) Doug Fernanadez/Jessica Garate
Best TV Weatherperson
With a shredded physique and lantern jaw, how could you not trust mild-mannered meteorologist Mark Ronchetti of KRQE News 13? We don't even blame him when we get freak hail or dust storms. It is a little strange that he and Superman are never in the same room, though. But Superman doesn't wear glasses, so it's probably nothing.
2) Steve Stucker
3) Joe Diaz
Best Radio Station
That's right, Middle America, you can keep your rocky rolls and your hippie hops. Here in Burque, we like our radio smart, informative and delivered in a smooth, even tone—with breaks for jazz and world music, of course. It probably won't make your trunk bump, but you will get to hear half a story about a French yarn artist before you get to work.
2) 100.3 The Peak
3) 104.1 The Edge
Best Place to Hike
Sandia Embudito Trail
Our wide open skies, beautiful landscapes and incredible biodiversity make ABQ the perfect place for anyone who loves escaping to the great outdoors. But of all the amazing hiking spots in town, the Sandia Embudito Trail is our favorite. At nearly nine and a half miles, the incredible views of the western slopes of the mountains make this somewhat difficult hike well worth the effort.
2) La Luz Trail
3) The Bosque
Best Bike Trail
Paseo del Bosque
Biking in an urban area can be fraught with peril and ugly sights. That’s why our favorite place to take a ride is the Paseo del Bosque trail: 16 miles of uninterrupted cycling fun through a natural setting that’s somehow hiding in the middle of the city. There’s nothing better than following the river on a sunny day with the wind in your hair.
2) Santa Fe Trail
Best Place to People Watch
Yippies, dippies and yoga-enthusiasts. Oh my! Nob Hill brings us more than its fair share of goofballs and bohemians, allowing us to observe them in their natural habitat. Just wear your drabbest earth tones, post up at one of the shops, and try to look inconspicuous. Don’t worry. Everyone will be too busy trying to get attention to notice you.
2) Frontier Restaurant/Downtown
3) Sunport/Old Town
Best Local Place to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse
Our voters obviously didn't think this one through. Sure, Costco seems like a great place to hole up during the zombie apocalypse. Barrels of processed cheese. All the booze you can drink. Bulk cocktail umbrellas. But those fascists are serious about checking for membership, and if you really think they'll suddenly relax their policy just because there's an undead horde outside, you've got another think coming.
2) UNM/Frontier Restaurant
Best Annual Charity Event
Doggie Dash and Dawdle
Every year thousands of people and dogs run to the Balloon Fiesta Park to take part in a day of pooch-themed fun. Whether it’s to help raise funds and awareness for the Humane Society, or just as an excuse to hang out in the sun and watch ABQ’s best friends having a ball, the Dash and Dawdle is our favorite way to give back.
2) Chocolate Fantasy
3) Souper Bowl
Best Reason to Stay in Albuquerque
We’ve got the perfect spot for weather. Sunny summers that won’t leave you a melty puddle, snowy winters that (usually) don’t strand you at home and just enough rain to keep us on our toes and make sure we don’t turn into any of those whiny West Coasters. Why would anyone want to leave?
3) Natural Beauty
Best Place to Take Grandparents
All geriatric jokes aside, who doesn't frigging love the BioPark? You can spend the whole day meandering around the botanical gardens alone. The zoo and aquarium are just whipped cream on the Jello mold. But if Grammy's in town, you'll be glad to know that moments of heart-threatening excitement are rare, and they have room for wheelchairs.
2) Old Town
3) Sandia Tram
Best Place to Take a First Date
There's nothing more romantic than a panoramic view at 10,000 feet above sea level. And amazing scenery isn't the only thing the Crest has to offer. Biologists have learned that a heightened heart rate will generate amorous feelings for those around you, and since high altitudes have a clear affect on heart rate, this is literally the best place you can take a first date. It's science.
2) Old Town
3) Pop Fizz
Best Place to Get Married
Los Poblanos has 25 acres of romantic gardens and cottonwoods to get lost in with your shiny new spouse. The historic site was designed by the “father of Santa Fe style,” John Gaw Meem, boasting 20 guest rooms, an organic farm and massive open spaces to host the fam. It's no wonder this is our voter's fave spot to say their “I do's.”
2) Botanical Gardens
Best Place to Take an Ashley Madison Date
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