He wouldn’t drink and drive, that’s for sure.
The holidays are here and that means your “new” habitual drinking is, too. You definitely should have fun being a drunkard, but for goodness' sake, don't drive if you've been drinking. Here's a compilation of safe ride services in town for you to use after you've enjoyed the Holy Spirit(s).
In case you don't want to leave your car behind, Albuquerque Street Guardians is a super cool service available any time between 7pm-3am, Tues-Sat. They'll arrive on a collapsable scooter (riding dirty, amirite?), take you home and then ride off into the night after you (and your car) arrive safely at your destination. Give them a call at (505) 881-7233.
Designated Drivers on Demand are available 24/7/365. They even have a monthly plan in case you expect you'll need them longer than December. (Don't forget about NYE or Valentine's Day.) You can reach these folks at (886) 885-6549 or by using their app available for iPhones and Android.
You can also use the cab companies in town by calling Albuquerque Cab Company at (505) 883-4888 or Yellow-Checker Cab Company Inc. at (505) 247-8888. Lyft is back in town and Uber and Dryver are always available options, as well. You can order a ride through both apps or on their respective websites (so make sure your phone is charged and/or you have a charger with you when you go out). I prefer Lyft because it's generally the cheapest, but Uber's app is superior regarding ease of use. Dryver is a neat option because they'll drive you in your own car wherever you want to go and stop as many times as you want.
The city bus may be unreliable (so I've heard) but it is always there; you may just need to wait awhile. While waiting you'll sober up, and you can reflect on what a drunken fool you are and wallow in your embarrassment or your feats of the night accomplished through your alcohol-induced courage. The city website has a downloadable map, an iPhone app and an interactive map. There's a free bus Downtown that goes from Second Street/Lomas to Third Street/Silver to Fifth Street/Silver to Fifth Street/Lomas and round again with several stops in between for your convenience.
Another likely situation you may find yourself in is dealing with a drunk friend or family member trying to drive. This uncomfortable situation must be dealt with quickly and appropriately starting with you not being aggressively confrontational. This is hardly ever a good idea, particularly with a drunk person. Explain things a little more slowly and more in-depth (because drunk people are dumb) and offer to order a ride for them or let them sleep over. If they're still resistant, tell them that you're worried they could hurt themselves and that you'd consider it a personal favor if they'd just chill out until they're sober. Another good technique is having more people back you up—peer pressure them! The more people there are, the more difficult it is for that person to say “no.” Remember, this is done out of love, not maliciousness.
So while you're out there celebrating the season of joy, make sure you don't ruin it with a tragedy. The holidays should be spent with friends and family, not in jail contemplating your DWI or worse. There are always options for getting home safely. That's something you can really cheers to.