Week in Sloth
The Week in Sloth
“Real Premonitions” (A&E 8 p.m.) Do people have psychic powers? I say yes, and here’s my prediction as proof: This new documentary is really just a crass tie-in on the part of A&E producers to promote a new Sandra Bullock movie hitting theaters on March 16, which just happens to be called Premonition.
“Clatterford” (BBC America 7 p.m.) This new Britcom (gotta love that word) takes place in a women’s club, which has ideals of promoting justice, tolerance and fellowship--but is really just a good place to dish the dirt on all the other gals in town.
“World Music Awards” (KASY-50 7 p.m.) Holy crow! MyNet TV is showing something, and it’s not a telenovela rewrite. I can’t say I’m all that interested in who wins this year’s “Best-Selling Chinese Artist” award, but I admire the diversity.
“Blood +” (Cartoon Network 1:30 a.m.) The vampiric anime film Blood: The Last Vampire gets its own series spin-off.
“Blood Ties” (Lifetime 7 p.m.) Apparently, the whole forensic cops thing is dead and gone. The new thing? Supernatural cops. If you’re a big fan of “The Dresden Files” and “Special Unit 2” and all those Anita Blake novels, here’s a new series about a female detective partnered with a vampire.
“IFL’s Total Impact” (KASY-50 7 p.m.) Mixed martial arts hits primetime thanks to this new weekly fight series on MyNet. Wait. This isn’t a telenovela either.
“The Riches” (FX 11 p.m.) Color me intrigued. Brits Eddie Izzard and Minnie Driver star in this new series as the heads of an itinerant Louisiana household full of con artists who steal the identity of a normal upscale family and set up shop in the suburbs.
“American Heiress” (KASY-50 7 p.m.) This, on the other hand, is a telenovela rewrite (of the TV Azteca series “La Heredera”). Turns out old Spanish soap operas aren’t the big craze MyNet was hoping for. MyNet’s programming of soaps is now scaled back to just two nights a week. This one might be fun for a laugh, at least. It’s about a spoiled American heiress named Elizabeth Wakefield whose family jet crash-lands in the jungle. For the next 65 episodes, she’ll be required to rely on hunky he-man J.D. Bruce to save her.
“Bullrun” (Spike 8 p.m.) Twelve teams of two drivers use their own cars to compete in a cross-country road race/reality show. Lawsuits to follow.
“Saints and Sinners” (KASY-50 7 p.m.) Allegedly, this new nighttime soap (Romeo and Juliet in the hotel biz) is the last scripted series MyNet will air. From here on out, it’s cheap-to-produce reality series and game shows--just like every other network.
“Halfway Home” (Comedy Central 11:30 p.m.) A bunch of messed-up ex-cons arrive at their run-down group home in CC’s newest improvised sitcom.