Week in Sloth
The Week in Sloth
“So You Think You Can Dance” (KASA-2 7 p.m.) Season 5 gets underway tonight. Soon, one of the show’s competitors will be just as famous as previous winners Nick Lazzarini, Benji Schwimmer, Sabra Johnson and Joshua Allen. Nick became the first person ever to appear on the cover of Dance Spirit magazine twice! Benji went on to choreograph routines for Season 1 of “So You Think You Can Dance Canada”! And Sabra performed in Iceland alongside Season 3 runner-up Danny Tidwell!
Blast of Silence (TCM 12:45 a.m.) TCM digs up an amazing piece of indie film history with this no-budget 1961 beatnik film noir from writer-director-star Allen Baron. In it, a socially disconnected hit man (Baron) wanders New York City in search of a gun.
“Re-Inventing Bonaduce” (FOX Reality Channel 9 p.m.) If you’ve ever wondered what the heck happened to Gretchen Bonaduce after she divorced washed-up kid star Danny Bonaduce ... Yeah, I’ll just stop there.
Diamonds (KOAT-7 8 p.m.) ABC goes surprisingly high-tone for this serious miniseries about the worldwide trade in illegal African gemstones. The sprawling ensemble cast includes Judy Davis, Sir Derek Jacobi and James Purefoy from “Rome.” What Traffic did for drugs, this one does for conflict diamonds.
“Land of the Lost” (Sci-Fi 6 a.m.) Sci-Fi celebrates the release of Will Ferrell’s new film with an all-day, Memorial Day marathon of the original 1974 kids series. Personally, I could not be more excited about a worse show.
“Cake Boss” (TLC 9 p.m.) Dear basic cable, if you’re going to come up with endless reality shows this summer, at least stop repeating yourself. Food Network already has “Ace of Cakes.”
“TV’s 50 Funniest Phrases” (KOB-4 7 p.m.) “To the Moon, Alice”? Still the most hilarious declaration of domestic abuse ever uttered.
“Mental” (KASA-2 8 p.m.) This hour-long drama about an unorthodox psychiatrist at a Los Angeles mental health hospital sounds suspiciously like “House” and is the first English-language TV series shot entirely in Colombia.
“The Little Couple” (TLC 8 p.m.) Dear TLC, what did I just say? Please see my 5/25 note for “Cake Boss.” You already have “Little People, Big World.” Do you really need another docu-reality show about little people who are married? Throw in “Jon & Kate Plus 8”/“Table for 12”/“18 Kids and Counting” (overbreeders), “Miami Ink”/“LA Ink” (tattoo artists), “Moving Up”/“My First Home”/“Property Ladder” (home buyers) and “American Chopper”/“Overhaulin’”/“Street Customs” (vehicle customizers) and you’re the most redundant channel on TV. Hey, how about a show starring tattooed midget hot rod builders with 25 kids? ... Actually, I might watch that.
“The Goode Family” (KOAT-7 8 p.m.) Mike Judge (“Beavis & Butt-Head,” “King of the Hill”) turns his animated talents toward chronicling the life of a politically, environmentally and socially correct family.