Week in Sloth
The Week in Sloth
“Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains” (KRQE-13 7 p.m.) CBS venerable reality show contest enters its 20th season with the best players from previous years. You think anyone will notice this time around that the “Villain” team is a bunch of backstabbing cheaters?
“XXI Winter Olympics” (KOB-4 6:30 p.m.) It’s the opening ceremony tonight. You can go back to not caring about them tomorrow night.
“Famous Crime Scene” (VH1 7 p.m.) VH1 goes all “CSI” with this new series investigating the scene of famous musicians’ deaths. Tonight: the place where Tupac Shakur got capped. ... Or faked his own death to go hang out with Elvis and Jim Morrison—whichever you prefer.
Elevator Girl (Hallmark 7 p.m.) “Party of Five” cutie Lacey Chabert stars in this TV movie about a free-spirited girl and a lawyer who fall in love while trapped in an elevator. Nice to see that remake of Lost In Space didn’t damage her career.
“Survivors” (BBC 7 p.m.) BBC’s newest sci-fi series is a remake of the 1975 cult classic by Terry Nation (a major old-school “Doctor Who” writer). Like the original, this drama features a ragtag group of survivors trying to get by in a world where a runaway virus has offed 95 percent of the Earth’s population.
“Sextistics: Your Love Life” (TLC 7 p.m.) Gee. My love life reduced to statistics and pie charts. That’s sexy. C’mon, TV, it’s Valentine’s Day. Don’t you have something a little more in the holiday spirit?
“Tyrannosaurus Sex” (Discovery 8 p.m.) ... Uh, never mind.
“How to Make It in America” (HBO 8 p.m.) A pair of twentysomething hustlers try to make it in Brooklyn in this East Coast sitcom from the producers of “Entourage.”
“The 234th Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show” (USA 6 p.m.) I like dogs as much as the next guy, but I’m hesitant to label this a “USA Sports Special.” I mean, it’s no team bobsledding. ... Which, come to think of it, would be awesome with dogs.
“Celebrity Close Calls” (Biography 8 p.m.) Celebrities (or whatever you want to label Erik Estrada, Leif Garrett and Coolio) recount that one time that they didn’t actually die. If you like that one, they’ve got a story about how they didn’t actually win the Oscar either.
“XXI Winter Olympics” (CNBC 7 p.m.) Yeah, the NBC prime-time feed has got speed skating tonight. But the real action is over on CNBC, which is broadcasting curling: USA vs. Norway! Pump those brooms, America! Trust me, nothing gets the girls back home excited more than the words, “I have an Olympic Gold Medal ... in curling.”
“Solving History With Olly Steeds” (Discovery 8 p.m.) Real-life-Indiana-Jones Olly Steeds goes looking for Nazi treasure—specifically, the legendary “Amber Room,” allegedly looted from the Russian Czars during World War II.