Week in Sloth
“Last Resort” (KOAT-7 7 p.m.) On the one hand, it’s a shame this timely, tense military thriller never made it to a full season. On the other hand, there’s something to be said for tight, short-form storytelling. Here’s hoping producers wrap things up well in this series finale.
“Project Runway” (Lifetime 7 p.m.) The 13th season gets underway in New York. This season actually includes one designer from New Mexico, Taos Pueblo fashionista Patricia Michaels. 505 in the house!
“Incredible Crew” (Cartoon Network 9 p.m.) Cartoon Network gets its first-ever (non-cartoon) sketch comedy series.
“Spartacus: War of the Damned” (Starz 7 p.m.) Spartacus (Liam McIntyre) finally gets around to starting that slave rebellion in Rome on the final season of “Spartacus.”
“The Brit List: Top 20 Women Who Date Across the Pond” (BBC America 9 p.m.) Is that a euphemism?
Abominable Snowman (Syfy 7 p.m.) I appreciate you getting Adrian Paul out of mothballs, Syfy. But you’re going to have to try harder than just “Abominable Snowman.” Can’t you throw a sharktopus or a tornado in there somewhere?
“The 19th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards” (TBS/TNT 6 p.m.) Dick Van Dyke gets a lifetime achievement award. Hope he doesn’t trip over a hassock on his way up to the stage.
The Makeover (KOAT-7 8 p.m.) George Bernard Shaw’s Pygmalion (or My Fair Lady, if you prefer the version with songs) gets a gender-swapped remake with education consultant Julia Stiles (“Dexter”) transforming beer vendor David Walton (“New Girl”) into a gentlemanly congressional candidate.
“Swamp Pawn” (CMT 8 p.m.) Congratulations, CMT, you’ve won this year’s award for the laziest, least original reality show concept on TV. We’ve already got “Cajun Pawn Stars,” for crying out loud. You could have at least given us “Alaska Pawn.”
“Built” (Style 7 p.m.) Style Network thinks it’s created the ultimate in lady porn—a reality series about hunky male models who moonlight as handymen, building custom closets for space-deprived New York women.
“Fashion Police: The 2013 SAG Awards” (E! 10 p.m.) Golden Globes, SAG: Joan Rivers and company appreciate when the awards shows come with built-in boob jokes.
“Southie Rules” (A&E 8 p.m.) Do you love docu-reality chronicles of annoying, ethnically stereotypical families you’ve never heard of and would never want to spend time with in real life? (See for reference: “Jersey Shore,” “BUCKWILD,” “The Shahs of Sunset,” “American Gypsies,” et al.) Well then here’s one about drunken Irish folks in Boston.
“Nikki & Sara Live!” (MTV 12 a.m.) Popular Internet podcasters Nikki Glaser and Sara Schaefer get their very own podcast with moving pictures (formerly known as “a TV show”).
“Tailgate Takeover: Super Bowl” (Travel 7 p.m.) Adam Richman (“Man v. Food”) heads around the country checking out tailgate parties—starting with the Super Bowl.
“The Americans” (FX 11 p.m.) Keri Russell (“Felicity”) and Matthew Rhys (“Brothers & Sisters”) star as a happily married suburban couple. Except they aren’t actually a happily married suburban couple. Instead they’re Russian sleeper agents doing the spy thing in Reagan-era America.
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