Week in Sloth
Mamie Van Doren Day (TCM 6 p.m.) Turner Classic Movies pays tribute to pneumatic blonde Mamie Van Doren with a multi-film fest, starting with 1957’s Untamed Youth, followed by 1959’s The Beat Generation, 1958’s Born Reckless, 1958’s Guns, Girls, and Gangsters, 1960’s Vice Raid, 1960’s Sex Kittens Go to College and 1957’s The Girl in Black Stockings. You can’t say Mamie didn’t stick with a theme.
“Dave Foley: Relatively Well” (Showtime 9 p.m.) Former “Kids in the Hall” comedian Dave Foley tries a little standup.
“Kate & Will: Happily Ever After” (E! 10 p.m.) I thought we were allowed to stop caring about these people after the wedding.
Jodi Arias: Dirty Little Secret (Lifetime 6 p.m.) Mere weeks after a hung jury left her fate hanging in the wind, Lifetime rushes a TV movie about the sexy Arizona killer onto the airwaves.
“666 Park Avenue” (KOAT-7 8 p.m.) Summer is a magical time of the year when TV shows that have been canceled rise from the dead to burn off their unaired episodes. So enjoy a little “666 Park Avenue” before it lumbers back to the grave.
“Skywire Live with Nik Wallenda” (Discovery 6 p.m.) The famed highwire artist attempts to walk across the Grand Canyon. Discovery has set aside two hours and 20 minutes so you can watch him do it. Rarely has excitement been so boring.
“Wife Swap” (KOAT-7 7 p.m.) Joan Rivers and Bristol Palin star in tonight’s episode, which sounds wacky enough until your realize neither is married. So it’s pretty much just “House Swap.”
“Crossing Lines” (KOB-4 8 p.m.) An elite, international crime-solving unit (including William Fichtner and Donald Sutherland) based in The Hague hunts down a serial killer.
“Whodunnit?” (KOAT-7 8 p.m.) Ever been to one of those lame mystery dinners where you have to dress up in costumes, eat hors d’oeuvres and figure out who murdered so-and-so? Well NBC has taken the last ounce of fun out of that scenario by having other people do it and making you watch.
“Devious Maids” (Lifetime 8 p.m.) This comedy-drama from producer Marc Cherry (“Desperate Housewives”) is based on the Mexican soap “Ellas son la Alegria del Hogar.”
“Naked & Afraid” (Discovery 8:20 p.m.) What good is one naked survival show (“Naked Castaway”) when you can have two?
“Under the Dome” (KRQE-13 9 p.m.) Stephen King turns The Simpsons Movie into a 13-episode horror story.
“King of Coke: Living the High Life” (National Geographic 7 p.m.) That “high” joke is there to let you know they’re not talking about soda pop.
“Big Brother” (KRQE-13 7 p.m.) Nothing says summer TV like, “Oh yeah, ‘Big Brother’ is still on the air after 15 seasons.”