Week In Sloth

Alibi
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Thursday 27

“Date Night Live” (Lifetime 8pm) Cameras follow actual couples on dates in real time, capturing “the promise of romance, awkward conversations and cringe-worthy moments.”

“Shark Storm” (Discovery 8pm) Yeah, call me back when it turns into a full-blown sharknado.

Friday 28

“The Last Tycoon” (Amazon streaming anytime) Matt Bomer (“White Collar”), Kelsey Grammer (“Frasier”) and Lily Collins (Mirror Mirror) star in this drama series based on F. Scott Fitzgerald’s final, unfinished novel.

“Room 104” (HBO 9:30pm) Champions of the mundane Mark and Jay Duplass more or less pioneered the “mumblecore” genre with their films The Puffy Chair, Baghead, Cyrus and Jeff, Who Lives at Home. But the writer/director/editor/producer/actor siblings are seriously funny dudes. Here, they launch a dramedy anthology set inside a corporate hotel near an airport.

Saturday 29

“The Kitty Kelley Files” (Reelz 8pm) Gossip-mongering celebrity “journalist” Kitty Kelley comes to TV to profile assorted famous people—most likely from the ’80s. Tonight, she sets her sights on poor Drew Barrymore, who definitely had a troubled childhood, but seems like a very nice grown-up.

Sunday 30

“Teen Wolf Top Ten Moments” (MTV 8:30pm) As the sixth (and final season) closes in on its end, MTV looks back at the “most pivotal, heartbreaking, talked about and OMG moments.”

“Ricky and Morty” (Cartoon Network 12:30am) Season three debuts, people. Time to get schwifty!

Monday 31

“Princess Diana: Tragedy or Treason?” (TLC 6pm) Twenty years after the fact, TLC spends three hours examining Diana’s accidental death (or was it murder?), proving that no conspiracy ever truly dies so long as there’s a celebrity involved.

“CBSN: On Assignment” (KRQE-13 9pm) CBS tries to eat up some summer hours with weekly news specials.

“Siesta Key” (MTV 11pm) MTV’s newest reality show follows a bunch of bikini-clad young adults spending the summer on the Florida coast.

“A Midsummer’s Nightmare” (Lifetime 9pm) This season-length teen thriller (liberally cribbed from Shakespeare) follows four young lovers into the woods. Instead of finding a romantic holiday, however, they’re targeted by a mysterious force that uses their own fantasies and darkest secrets against them.

Tuesday 1

“Manhunt: Unabomber” (Discovery 7pm) This splashy, eight-part dramatization looks at how FBI profiler Jim Fitzgerald (Sam Worthington from Avatar) helped track down Unabomber Ted Kaczynski (Paul Bettany from A Beautiful Mind and The Avengers: Age Of Ultron). Jane Lynch is Janet Reno—which sounds hilarious, but probably isn’t.

Wednesday 2

“The Lowe Files” (A&E 8pm) Rob Lowe and his two sons turn supernatural investigators. For real. Hey, if Rob Lowe can’t find Bigfoot, no one can.

“The Sinner” (USA 8pm) Jessica Biel and Bill Pullman star in this eight-episode crime thriller which tries to puzzle out what caused a young housewife and mother to commit a startling—and very public—act of violence.

“Darkness” (Discovery 8pm) For this new survival reality show, three strangers are locked underground in darkness (caves, fallout shelters, etc.) and must find a way to escape. Hey, it beats a gig on “Date Night Live.”
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