Week in Sloth
“Most Extreme Elimination Challenge” (Spike 8 p.m.) Spike TV kicks off a new season of its hilariously violent and dubbed for the sake of comedy Japanese game show with a one-hour “almost live” special.
“Just the Facts” (Court TV 8 p.m.) Real life police detectives, federal agents and private investigators rate their TV counterparts. Surprisingly, the most accurate TV cop show turns out to be “Baywatch Nights.” Who knew?
The Devil's Rain (AMC 8:30 p.m.) This 1975 schlockfest about a gang of Satanists in the American Southwest is notable mostly for its bizarre cast. Poseidon Adventurer Ernest Borgnine, “Green Acres” resident Eddie Albert, Poltergeist dad Tom Skerritt, “Star Trek” overactor William Shatner, '30s idol Ida Lupino, character actor Keenan Wynn, real-life Satanist Anton LaVey and a very young John Travolta (in his very first role) are among the devil worshippers and their victims.
“The Price is Right Million Dollar Spectacular” (KRQE-13 7 p.m.) Tonight, teachers compete for education-oriented prizes. Hey, I think TV has found a solution to No Child Left Behind. If President Bush were smart, he'd rely on TV more often to solve his problems. I mean, how can anyone say the U.S. job market is bad? Somebody just got hired on “The Apprentice.”
Dinocroc (Sci-Fi Channel 7 p.m.) Is it just me, or should that title have an exclamation point on it?
Brave New Girl (ABC Family 6 p.m.) Based on the treacle-filled semi-autobiography by Britney Spears and her stage mother Lynne comes this even more sappy TV pic about a poor Texas gal who overcomes ... well, virtually nothing to become a singer.
Out for a Kill (USA 6 p.m.) Fat boy Steven Seagal returns to the action movie genre as a kung fu-fighting archeologist who clashes with Chinese gangsters. Watching people call Steven Seagal “Professor” is unintentionally hilarious.
Stealing Sinatra (Showtime 9 p.m.) William H. Macy and David Arquette star in this true-life comedy about three men who decided to fund their American dream by kidnapping the son of famed singer Frank Sinatra. (Bad idea.)
“Arrested Development” (KASA-2 8:30 p.m.) This may be your last chance to catch this brilliant but ratings-challenged comedy. In tonight's season finale, George Sr. breaks out of jail and hightails it to Mexico with Kitty.
“The Ultimate Tree House” (Dicovery 9 p.m.) I bet if I dig through my garage, I could find two or three notebooks from fourth grade filled with tree house plans that would put these backyard abodes to shame.
The Weather Underground (KNME-5 9 p.m.) This gripping documentary takes us back to the '60s when a radical activist group decided to take politics to the next level and kicked off a shocking series of domestic bombings designed to overthrow the government.
Strip Search (HBO 10:30 p.m.) This fascinating psychological drama/film experiment asks us to contemplate how much of our freedoms we'd be willing to give up in order to achieve safety in today's post-9-11 environment. Directors Sidney Lumet (Dog Day Afternoon) and Barry Levinson (Diner) direct two parallel segments about young students interrogated by authorities. One takes place in China, one in America. Each contains the exact same dialogue. Glenn Close, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Oliver Platt and Ellen Barkin star.
“Shorties Watchin' Shorties” (Comedy Central 11:30 p.m.) Famous stand-up comics like Dennis Leary and Janeane Garofalo have some of their routines turned into short cartoons in this new animated anthology series.