Kevin Smith (Clerks, Dogma, Red State) writes and directs this year's most WTF? film experience. This wildly uneven splatstick horror comedy finds an obnoxious podcaster (Justin Long, Live Free or Die Hard) kidnapped by an elderly Canadian seaman (Michael Parks, Kill Bill) who wants to do unspeakable things to the poor guy. Parks saves the day her with his quiet menace, but certain other cast members (who will remain nameless) are extremely freaking silly. If you've ever wondered what it would be like if someone combined The Human Centipede with a Bob and Doug McKenzie sketch, here's your answer.101 minutes R.