Alibi V.14 No.38 • Sept 22-28, 2005

Gus Pedrotty’s Alibi interview [Video]

Gus Pedrotty—Gus, as he likes to be known—stopped by Alibi Headquarters to discuss a bid for mayor that began as idealistic—and some would say unlikely—but has since been transformed into one of the more vital and remarkable candidacies that have passed through this high desert city in ages.

Eric Williams

Alibi Celebrates Pride

Guests of the N.M. Pride Celebration join Weekly Alibi to party

We would like to thank everyone who visited our booth at the Albuquerque Pride Celebration and the wonderful folx running the beautiful event.

feature

Twisting the Debate

The most telling aspect of the debate over Albuquerque's proposed living wage ordinance, up for referendum early next month, is how little honest public debate is actually taking place

A proposal to increase the minimum wage in Albuquerque to $7.50 per hour and the hourly wages of tipped employees to $4.50 will appear on the Oct. 4 municipal ballot. Proponents say this measure could lift some 30,000 to 40,000 people in our city out of poverty and that passage of the law is a moral and economic imperative.

Spin This

A brief primer on the art of the fallacy

It was in Ancient Greece during the fifth century BC that rhetoric—the art of public speaking—began to be taught in the ancient cities of Athens and Syracuse as the need arose for citizens to argue effectively and persuade their fellows in the jury courts and political assemblies. Rhetoric was also used on ceremonial occasions such as funeral orations. The study of rhetoric involved the use of different types of arguments. The appeal to reason involved the use of logic, and Aristotle was the first to formalize this discipline.

film

Reel World

Mystery Movie—Burning Paradise Video is holding a “mystery” fundraiser for the upcoming TromaDance New Mexico Film Festival. It takes place this Friday at 11 p.m., the Guild Cinema. Though I can't spill the beans on the film's title, I can assure you it features Japanese schoolgirls, high-powered weaponry and assloads of action. This film has never been released in America and has yet to make the leap to DVD in this country. It is one of the most talked-about international films in the last 10 years, and you need to see it on the big screen. Tickets are a mere $5. All proceeds go toward TromaDance New Mexico.

Tim Burton's Corpse Bride

Animated musical weaves delightfully dark spell

Teenage Goth girls, feel free to rejoice. There's finally something new to buy at Hot Topic. Tim Burton, high priest of all that is oddball, offbeat and scary-cute, has finally completed Corpse Bride, his long-awaited follow-up to 1993's The Nightmare Before Christmas. Rest assured, heavily pierced stock clerks are working overtime to get Corpse Bride merchandise onto store shelves nationwide.

Touch the Sound

Mesmerizing documentary picks up the rhythm of life

In 2001, German filmmaker Thomas Riedelsheimer created the closest thing to a cult sensation on the art house circuit when he wrote, edited, directed and acted as cinematographer on Rivers and Tides, a breathtakingly gorgeous documentary about sculptor/photographer Andy Goldsworthy. Goldsworthy, the burly British poet of sticks and rocks, was a magnificent subject for a documentary, but Riedelsheimer took it a step further, creating a film that served as a perfect artistic complement to its subject.

Haunted Hunks

“Supernatural” on The WB

I give The WB credit for one thing: Its ratings may not challange the Big Three networks, but it sure knows how to cater to an audience. Since its inception, The WB has been a breeding ground for attractive teen soap stars (the kind who appear in “7th Heaven,” “Everwood,” “Gilmore Girls,” “One Tree Hill” and even the soaped-up “Smallville”). From there, these young hunks and hotties are free to populate the dozens of cheap teen horror movies that Hollywood cranks out with wearying regularity these days. Where would the remake of House of Wax have been without you, WB?

news

A Case of the Humps

Speed humps in Four Hills Village impact District 9 Council race

Sometimes everything comes down to a good, old-fashioned hump. Er, speed hump, that is. At least, that may be the case in Four Hills Village in District 9, where residents are getting all riled up over a familiar issue just in time for the Oct. 4 city election.

Bin Laden's Anniversary Party

Toasting Bush's Incompetence

Osama Bin Laden just celebrated his fourth anniversary as the motivator of 19 men who murdered 3,000 Americans. Somewhere in the mountains of Central Asia, he and Dr. Zawahiri, his chief strategist, might have observed Sept. 11 with tea and sweets. Perhaps they received a congratulatory note from Mullah Omar, the one-eyed Taliban leader who sheltered Al Qaeda while it plotted attacks on Manhattan and Washington, and who also continues to enjoy his freedom. He even has a spokesperson operating openly in Pakistan.

Odds & Ends

Dateline: Holland—A 31-year-old dutchman returned home from work to find a strange car parked in the driveway of his home in Pieterburen. Two children were sitting in the backseat, so the man asked them where their father was. According to Nu.nl, a local newspaper, the children said their father was “robbing” the man's house. The homeowner rushed inside to find a man and a woman who immediately ran out and drove off with the children. The homeowner could not catch the burglars, who did not have time to steal anything, but he was able to describe the entire family to police.

music

Music to Your Ears

Visions of Bob Dylan—As part of the PBS "American Masters" series, this Monday and Tuesday night at 9 p.m. KNME (Channel 5) will air the two-part Martin Scorcese-directed documentary Bob Dylan: No Direction Home. The film covers the singer-songwriter's life and music from 1961 to 1966, and includes rare and never-before-seen footage and new interviews with the artist himself as well as Allen Ginsberg, Pete Seeger and Joan Baez. We deem this mandatory viewing. (JCC)

Sonic Reducer

Oh, Canada, is there no end to the brilliant music born of your cold, cold womb and exported from your exotic land? Here, the sound of the Ontario province is somewhat post-punk and similar to the Afghan Whigs (which is cemented by the vocal likeness to Greg Dulli). Tournament of Hearts is epic in scope and embodies a strange tone which has the power to summon dark delusions and desperate entreatments, an album which is good in its entirety.

Matisyahu in tha Bayiiiiit!

Or, Matisyahu in tha houuuuse!

We've seen a wellspring of Jewish culture bubble up in popular music over the past few years. (Somewhat ironic given that Judaism has been around for, what, six millennia? But I digress. ... ) These days, even the pickiest of Jews can choose between schticky rap, shtettle-infused indie and "klezcore" punk. And now, thanks to a guy named Matisyahu, there's one more exodus from the norm—Orthodox Jewish reggae. You heard right. Instead of toking herb and praising Jah, this Hasidic New Yorker is all about the Torah—and he's good at it, too. Last week, the Alibi sat down for a phoner with Matisyahu, the world's first Hasidic reggae star.

Blackalicious Takes Us to School

Uh, it's embarrassingly obvious here how little I know about hip-hop. Hey, don't blame a girl for trying.

Bay Area two-man rap act Blackalicious, made up of Chief Xcel and Gift of Gab, will not only put on a show for Albuquerque this week, they're releasing their fifth full-length studio album, The Craft, on Sept. 27. Gift of Gab recently spoke with the Alibi's hip-hopically challenged Jessica Cassyle Carr.

Flyer on the Wall

Hey kids! Wanna join the FOTW Poster Posse? Send your flyers to cassyle@alibi.com, post one up for free at alibi.com/ads or drop one off at 413 Central NW. Sorry, decoder rings are no longer included. (LM)

art

Culture Shock

Read It and Weep—If you're one of the three or four people left in Albuquerque who haven't read Rudolfo Anaya's classic tale Bless Me, Ultíma, then Albuquerque Readfest is about to present you with a golden opportunity. Actually, if you have already read it, do yourself a favor and read it again. Anaya's novel is featured as the next selection in the city's innovative experiment in communal reading. Here's how it works.

Three Digital Painters

New Mexico Symphony Orchestra Offices

Three founders of the Digital Fine Art Society of New Mexico will exhibit their digital paintings at the offices of the New Mexico Symphony Orchestra (4007 Menaul NE) from Sept. 23 through Oct. 18. The reception will be on Friday, Oct. 7, from 5 to 7 p.m. Computers allow these artist to mix and merge mixed media and photography (digital and darkroom) with their paintings. Weird and wacky stuff. For more information, call 881-9590.

Golden Ticket to Ride

Go! Downtown Arts Festival

"It's four days on the streets of Downtown Albuquerque," says Amy Turner, one of the organizers of this year's Go! Downtown Arts Festival. "Rapid Ride has been rerouted. Basement Films will be projecting on the side of one of the buildings. There'll be lots of belly dancers and other performers. It's bigger than it's ever been."

food

All the News That's Fit to Eat

The Return of Tony Nethery—After a stint as sous chef at OLA Steak in Miami, Fla., Tony Nethery has returned to the Duke City. The former Monte Vista Fire Station executive chef says that working under OLA's Chef Douglas Rodriguez was an amazing learning experience, but that, ultimately, he and his wife wanted to raise their new baby back on New Mexican dirt. Nethery is the not-so-silent business partner of Johnny Orr, the chef and owner of Relish Cheese Market & Sandwich Shop. With plans for a second Relish location in Downtown Albuquerque, Nethery knew that he had to come home and look after his other "baby," too. Although he's only been back a few weeks, the team is already hard at work on the new shop's menu, which won't open until sometime in October. Until then, you can find Nethery slinging sandwiches in the Northeast Heights at Relish (8019 Menaul NE, 299-0001).

Alibi V.14 No.37 • Sept 15-21, 2005

feature

Happy Days, Albuquerque!

Election Day is Oct.4

As the saying goes, there's wisdom in crowds. We trust then that you, Albuquerque voters, have good sense, want to be well-informed and will attend a neighborhood mayoral forum or City Council debate. Seeing and hearing these candidates in person is always revealing in ways that reading descriptions of them in a newspaper cannot be. But if such a task is too much of a strain on your busy schedule, we'll do our best to assist in the only way we know how. We'll call it like we see it, and you can take or leave our advice.

Alibi Election Endorsements

A handy clip-out guide to bring to the polls on Tuesday, Oct. 4

Mayor: Eric Griego

City Council Races
District 1: Miguel Gómez
District 3: Isaac Benton
District 5: Michael Cadigan
District 7: Marianne Dickinson
District 9: Chris Catechis

Ballot Initiatives
Public Campaign Financing: Yes
Living Wage Ordinance: Yes
Voter ID: No

A Living Wage

We support the ballot initiative to raise the minimum wage in Albuquerque.

As you know, we're not economists. But, to be sure, we don't want to see any local businesses harmed. In fact, the Alibi is a local business and part of our business is to support other local businesses through effective, widespread advertising. When we say we care about the local economy, it's because our livelihood depends on it.

We realize this is a controversial decision and some folks in the restaurant, retail and service industries are fearful of its ill-effects. But since other cities such as San Francisco, Madison and Santa Fe have already led the way, we suggest folks consider the outcome in these parts and put their fears aside.

Voter ID

Let's not mince words here. The Voter ID proposal that will be on the ballot on Oct. 4 is a straight-up political sham. This isn't to say that requiring voters to show an ID when they go to the polls is a bad thing. It isn't. But as it stands, the current proposal leaves much to be desired.

Mayor

Eric Griego

The Alibi enthusiastically endorses City Councilor Eric Griego to be our next mayor. We believe his four years on the Council have given him the experience to make Albuquerque a safer, more efficient and economically vibrant city. We believe his vision, candor and enthusiasm will serve the city well in its pursuit of a diversified economy, better planning and honest government.

District 1

Miguel Gómez

One of the most unfortunate aspects of modern American politics is that it often takes a bloody political brawl to get voters to pay attention to an election. For better or worse, the battle for District 1 has shaped up as a vocal fight between two vehement political rivals with diametrically opposed visions for the future of both their district and our city.

Campaign Financing

In recent decades, fundraising in federal, state and municipal elections has ballooned to absurd proportions. Consequently, there's an increased and very real danger that wealthy donors and organizations will exert an unfair influence on the candidates they've showered with money. This is bad for our democracy, and it's bad for the future of our city.

District 3

Isaac Benton

District 3 is comprised of a diverse cross section of neighborhoods stretching from UNM, throughout Downtown and across to the Westside. It's the literal heart of the city, an anchor for the tourist and entertainment industries, centralizing the city's so-called "string of pearls," made up of cultural amenities like the KiMo Theater, BioPark, Explora, Old Town, Natural History Museum and the rapidly transforming EDO corridor. Intertwined with these areas are some of the city's most established, historic neighborhoods like Huning Highlands, South Broadway, East San Jose and Barelas.

District 5

Michael Cadigan

District 5 can fairly be described as the northwest quadrant of Albuquerque. The area, unfortunately, is a testament to the American dream gone fatally wrong in the form of sprawl, inept urban planning and transportation gridlock.

District 7

Marianne Dickinson

Marianne Dickinson is hands-down the best candidate running for District 7 and might be the best candidate running for any office in this year's municipal election. She's intelligent, savvy and comes with a wealth of experience in community development rooted in Albuquerque for more than 20 years.

District 9

Chris Catechis

The bad news for District 9 is that incumbent City Councilor Tina Cummins is seeking re-election. The good news is you get to vote for someone else. The even better news is you can have a candidate genuinely informed on the issues and passionate about the area—two requisites sorely lacking in Cummins. Your choices are between Vivian Cordova, Don Harris and Chris Catechis, three candidates who cited Tina Cummins' lack of responsiveness to the district's needs as reasons for running.

music

Music to Your Ears

Euphoria: Back in Black—Actually, it never went anywhere. Pulse manager Lisa VanDyke says that the gothic/industrial dance party does and will continue to have a home at Pulse on Thursday nights, just as it has for the past seven years. VanDyke says Euphoria is not affiliated with any other venues, and despite the recent exodus of a few employees, it's still going strong at Pulse. In fact, she says "it's only going to get better!" VanDyke and founding member DJ Vladmira plan to turn up Euphoria's voltage with local and national guest DJs, special performances and a fresh injection of electroclash into Pulse's already potent gothic/industrial cocktail. Party on, children of the night!

Concert to Benefit Katrina Victims

featuring The Folks, Anonymous Victims, Last Fifteen, Weapons of Mass Destruction, Jealous Gods, One for Hope, Scenester, Baked, The Mindy Set, Of God and Science, simple. and Feels Like Sunday

Monday, Sept. 19; the Launchpad, 7 p.m. (all-ages until 11 p.m.), $8 (proceeds go to the Hurricane Relief Fund): When the going gets tough, the tough grab a guitar. This Monday, the Launchpad plays host to a benefit concert for the victims of Hurricane Katrina, and the show will feature much more than just a smattering of local talent. Whether you're looking for the indie rock of The Mindy Set, the Zeppelin-inspired sounds of Jealous Gods or the country twanged-out pop-punk of Scenester, there's something to keep everyone in the groove. It's been said that rock and roll has the power to heal. On Monday, rock and roll—and you—have the power to help. Please do what you can, for goodness sake, and have a freaking great time doing it!

Battle of the Bands: The New Mexico Music Commission Talent Showcase

Saturday, Sept. 17, at Expo New Mexico's Ford Pavilion

Even though I'm convinced that Expo New Mexico ripped off my idea for chile relleno corn dogs, there are a few attractions at this year's fair that have managed to suspend my distrust of those midway hucksters, at least for the time being. Indeed, the New Mexico Music Commission Talent Showcase signals that better and brighter things are to come, not only at the State Fair, but for New Mexico music in general. The showcase is presented by the New Mexico Music Commission, a group that was signed into existence just last April by Governor Bill Richardson. According to its organizers, the commission's main objective is to work with local musicians in promoting their "continued creativity," and by assisting the state's music industry "in reaching its full potential." It's a step in the right direction, to say the least.

Lower Than Dirt CD Release Party

Think of lead singer Scott Salvas as a sort of metal-core ambassador. He and his band, Lower Than Dirt (or LTD as the kids call them), are dedicated to pleasing not only neo-metal devotees, but old-school metal, death metal and screamo aficionados as well. "I know every band says this, but we really do try to rock in a different way," Salvas says. "Even if somebody doesn't usually listen to metal, they can still walk away impressed by us because we put on a good rock show."

International Extreme Music Festival

with God Dethroned, Manntis, Nightrage, Hell Within, Epoch of Unlight, Lilitu and Thine Eyes Bleed

Tuesday, Sept. 20; the Launchpad (all-ages), $15: Whaaaooooaaa! Whaaoooaaaa—just one of the sounds your disgusting ears will hear tonight at the Extreme Music Festival, where morbid black metal and thrash will consume all who embark upon the Launchpad. This dark horror will result from performances by a variety of bands new to the black arts, as well as Swedish dark masters God Dethroned and Swedish/Greek/French pan-European overlords, Nightrage (not to be confused with '80s hair metal band Night Ranger, who would probably be severely augmented if they were to ever encounter Nightrage). You might feel a sense of foreboding as your brain is aggressively disassembled by a bloody onslaught of warp-speed shredding and drumming combined with incoherent, but surely evil, incantations which will come whence forth from the song-master's inner sanctum. Only the dungeons of hell and Warlock guitars could create such cacophony. If, like me, you've heard of the madness which is Northern European black metal and desire to see the massacre as well as its stateside counterpart for your ugly selves, throw the horns, get some goddamn ear plugs and join the unholy festival. Uhhhhhhhhhwwaaa, whoooaaaa, ha, ha, ha!

Sonic Reducer

Minus the Bear's lead singer, Jake Snider, has taken some heat from critics over his somewhat emotionally deprived vocals. But Menos el Oso doesn't have to be about deep-rooted feelings and catharsis for me to get behind it. It's enough that, after the first listen, hearing it again was more appealing than a night of repeated fornication. That may, perhaps, be pushing it, but fornication aside, the ideal amount of programmed beats and synthesizer, together with tremolo-guitar and downright dreamy vocals, make Menos el Oso f—ing terrific!

Flyer on the Wall

Thursday, Sept.15, at the Launchpad. See “Lucky 7.”--Get famous! Send us your upcoming show posters! Submissions should be timely, eye-catching, heavy on graphics and light on text. Flyers that are late, very dark or low in resolution won't show up in print. Send your submissions to cassyle@alibi.com or post one up at alibi.com/ads in the Gigs/Show Flyers section. (LM)

news

Takin' It to the Limit

New Mexico Utilities has maxed out their water rights, which could impact development on the Westside

As we in the Southwest all know, water always comes at a price. But in the near future, for residents and businesses on the Westside, that price could get pretty high. Due to a recent feud between New Mexico Utilities, the for-profit carrier for 13,000 users in the northern Westside, and the Albuquerque-Bernalillo Water Utility Authority, a joint public agency, the private company that's been serving the area for more than 30 years may be in trouble. They're currently surpassing their threshold for water rights and that could lead to some costly legal battles.

Sally's Rough Ride

Republicans scoff at Mayer's re-election bid

What a difference four years makes. When Sally Mayer ran for Albuquerque's District 7 Council seat, hardly anyone in the area knew her. Maybe for that reason she had an easy time defeating incumbent Tim Kline. Republicans accepted her as their candidate while Democrats slept.

Now That Takes Real Cajones

A few years ago, the city was in big time financial trouble. It had experienced several consecutive years of flat revenue growth (much of it due to major tax cuts enacted at the state level that severely hobbled municipal income) and a simultaneous growth in citizen expectations for services. The result was a crisis.

Odds & Ends

Dateline: England—Housing developers in Britain have come up with a novel way to move their merchandise: Buy a house, get a free pig. Property developer Jeremy Paxton has promised to supply a fully house-trained Gloucester Old Spot pig to anyone investing in a home on the exclusive Lower Mill estate, near Cirencester, Gloucestershire, southwest England. “It will make a change from having a labrador,” a spokesperson said. The unusual offer has already attracted two new homeowners.

film

Reel World

Education in Acting—Frank Zuniga, former head of the New Mexico State Film Office, founder of the SouthWest Institute of Film and Television and longtime film director for Disney, is starting up a series of Red Thunder Film Academy Workshops at the National Hispanic Cultural Center. The first is a yearlong Film Acting Workshop starting Saturday, Sept. 17. This 12-week program will explore the spectrum of acting techniques and disciplines used in film acting. Character analysis, subtext, voice, body control, breathing techniques and sense memory will all be integral parts of the introductory program. A comprehensive approach is emphasized in this workshop and participants will walk away with an understanding of agents, lawyers, managers, auditions, networking and other important facets of the actor's life. The fee for the workshop is $200 a month and will be limited to 24 participants. Workshops will take place in the Roy E. Disney Center for the Performing Arts at the NHCC (1701 Fourth Street SW). For more information, contact Frank Zuniga at 898-5838.

Same-Sex Cinema

Southwest Gay & Lesbian Film Festival 2005

In only its third year of existence, the Southwest Gay & Lesbian Film Festival has grown by leaps and bounds. You'd be hard-pressed to dismiss this year's epic offering as a tiny fringe festival that caters to a local minority. With its third annual outing, the festival has become the kind of all-inclusive arts gathering that bigger cities like San Francisco, Los Angeles, Boston and Miami are lauded for. The festival also goes a long way toward establishing Albuquerque's gay, lesbian and transgender community as a mainstream economic, social and artistic force. In other words: It's huge, it's cool and it's probably good for your property values.

VideoNasty

Women's Prison Massacre (1983)

When I was but a young lad, I had the good fortune to see The Big Bird Cage at a friend's house. Written and directed by the legendary Jack Hill (Spider Baby) the film resulted in both my lifelong desire to nail Pam Grier, and my enduring affinity for women in prison films. And when it comes to the women in prison genre, few flicks get it done better than Women's Prison Massacre, directed by sleazemaster Bruno Mattei.

TV's Dramatic Return

New fall shows around the dial

TV is a numbers game, so let's look at some of this year's numbers. Of the 31 new shows hitting the networks this fall, 10 are sitcoms, only two are reality shows and a staggering 19 are hour-long dramas.

art

Culture Shock

In Memoriam—The late great poet Robert Creeley gets his due in a reading this weekend at the Anasazi Fields Winery in Placitas. Creeley died earlier this year of pneumonia following a distinguished career in which he was widely recognized as one of the most innovative poets of the last half of the 20th century.

Down the Line

The Unexpected Man at the Cell Theatre

At the top of my Christmas wish list is a piece of imaginary technology I like to call the Thought Machine. It basically consists of a set of headphones connected to a kind of ray gun. When you aim the gun at people and press the trigger, it shoots out an invisible ray that allows you to listen to their thoughts. I'm hoping that 20 years from now I'll be able to pick up one of these babies at Target for $39.95. In The Unexpected Man, a play currently running at the Cell Theatre, playwright Yasmina Reza uses a similar sort of theatrical technology to crack open the silent thoughts of her two characters.

Awadagin Pratt

Popejoy Hall

Pianist Awadagin Pratt is known for challenging the classical musical establishment by forcing his audiences to rethink the way music is heard. He will open the 2005-2006 New Mexico Symphony Orchestra season with performances of Beethoven's Piano Concerto No. 3 and Mahler's Symphony No. 5 at UNM's Popejoy Hall on Friday, Sept. 16, through Saturday, Sept. 17. Come on down and check out an Albuquerque fave. Tickets range from $10 to $60. Call for times. 881-8999.

Albuquerque Pedestrian Project

Harwood Art Center

You may unknowingly be part of Alexander Ferguson's new exhibit, the Albuquerque Pedestrian Project at the Harwood Art Center (1114 Seventh Street NW). He tapes processed film to the ground in certain areas of the city, creating photographic images without a camera. Elements, people, animals and time create the image rather than light. Ferguson also made sound recordings at each site. You can hear these through headphones mounted on the walls of the exhibit, placed beside each corresponding photograph. A reception for the exhibit will be held Friday, Sept. 16, from 5 to 8:30 p.m. in the Harwood's North Gallery. Runs through Sept. 28. 242-6367.

East Meets West

An interview with Salman Rushdie

In the last decade Americans have watched dumbfounded as the Cold War evolved into the War on Terror. How did this happen? Why did it happen? And who is to blame? Perhaps the most qualified novelist in the world to address these questions is 58-year-old Salman Rushdie. Indian by way of Pakistan and Anglo by way of boarding school in England, Rushdie is a quintessential east-west soul. Born into a secular Muslim household, he experienced the wrath of Islamic fundamentalism in 1989 when Ayatollah Khomeini put a bounty on his head for the perceived slights against Muslims in his comic novel, Satanic Verses.

food

All the News that's Fit to Eat ... King-Sized!

Restaurant Relief for Katrina—Hurricane Katrina has a devastating strangle-hold on the lives of countless people along the Gulf Coast, but the disaster hit especially close to home for Louisiana's hospitality workers. A huge percentage of the state's economy is based in New Orleans' bustling tourist and hospitality industries. Even without the massive appeal of Mardi Gras, New Orleans is a hub for national and international conventions, entertainment and dining. In fact, the city was chosen as one America's top five restaurant destinations by Bon Appétit just last month.

Alibi V.14 No.36 • Sept 8-14, 2005

feature

Haiku-ku-ka-choo

The Alibi's 14th Annual Haiku Contest

As summer heads for the highway with its slimy pink tail tucked between its trembling legs, Albuquerqueans have several causes for consolation. The soul-crushing heat is finally over. The brats are finally back in school. The giant watery brown serpent that winds through the center of our city will soon be rimmed with bright golden cottonwoods. Best of all, though, you're holding the Alibi's annual haiku contest in your hands, and that's reason enough to celebrate.
The talent on display this year is almost as mind-boggling as the vast quantity of entries we received from all over the country, with a few coming in from foreign lands. I hope you enjoy reading the winners and honorable mentions half as much as we enjoyed judging the contest. Special Alibi Haiku Command Unit 56-1A—made up of Christie Chisholm, Jessica Cassyle Carr, Laura Marrich and myself—labored for several agonizing days over the submissions. I think you'll be pleased with the results, and if you aren't, then whining, as usual, will get you nowhere.
Finally, special thanks to Bookworks (4022 Rio Grande NW, 344-8139), the District (Fourth Street and Copper, 243-0003), Ralli's (Fourth Street and Central, 243-1093) and the Guild Cinema (3405 Central NE, 255-1848) for sponsoring this year's contest.

Best Traditional Haiku

A couple more Republican presidential administrations, and there won't be any more nature worth haikuing about. So enjoy it while it lasts! Grand Imperial Mistress of Haiku Gail Miller gets a $25 gift certificate to Bookworks, a $20 certificate to the District and two passes to the Guild Cinema for a haiku that I suppose could best be labeled neotraditional. Whatever you call it, it's a beauty.

Winner
The rain falls in code—
Wet spidery penmanship
That demands cracking.
—Gail Miller

Honorable Mentions
An empty can glides
Across shattered asphalt lots
Eight pigeons take flight
—Susan Cummings

Over bleached salt flats
Ten blackbirds flapping north change
To a tar-smoke cloud
—Carol Moscrip

Strands of green kelp, locked
In late tide's rock pool, bracelet
Arms of a red star
—Carol Moscrip

A leaf falls, twig snaps
I think about winter air
Frogs freezing in mud
—Shelby Anderson

Oranges tossed upon
A river after New Year:
Souls or good fortune?
—Leslie McMurtry

Late frost fingers pinch
Buds, plump like ladies' bottoms,
Blue where pink belongs.
—Janet S. Harris

Best Albuquerque Haiku

Albuquerque has a reputation for being a gritty, down and dirty sort of town—just the sort of town, in other words, to inspire delectable haiku. Rhoda Kunin tells us that, to be fully appreciated, her winning haiku must be recited in the accent of a Transylvanian vampire. She wins a $40 certificate to Ralli's and two passes to the Guild Cinema.

Best Haiku About Why You Hate Your Job

I suppose it's to be expected that the only cheerful haiku we received in this category came from unemployed poets. Working can suck. No doubt about it. Hell, even I know that, and I work at the Alibi, which is a crazy, fun-park, merry-go-round of unadulterated orgiastic bliss compared to most jobs out there. (I once got a foot rub and wrote an article about it. You call that work? Please.) John L. Orman's grotesque haiku wins hands down (yeah, pun intended). He gets a $40 certificate to the District and two passes to the Guild Cinema.

Winner
Crank up wood chipper—
Full day of hacking up bark.
Blood! Look ma, no hands!
—John L. Orman

Honorable Mention
Telephones scream like
Wailing children with flashing
fluorescent light bones
—Amanda Rich

Smells bad I'm greasy
My boss is a fat weenie
I hate Schnitzelhut
—Diego Murray

When you work down in
the bowels of the brown earth—
dark, deep shit happens.
—John L. Orman

For me to hate my
Job would require me to seek
Gainful employment.
—MF Ward

Best Haiku About Fish Sticks

What is it about the humble fish stick that's capable of inspiring such a lyrical outpouring of insight into the human experience? Honestly, I'm not quite sure. All you've got to do is wave a thawed finger of breaded substandard fish in front of mediocre poets and suddenly they're spouting rapid-fire liquid verse like Shakespeare on amphetamines. Go figure. Gail Miller wins a $40 certificate to Ralli's and two passes to the Guild Cinema. We don't know what the heck her haiku means, but we love it anyway. Sue us.

Winner
In his wax canoe
Fish Stick glides through polar ice
While Eskimos weep.
—Gail Miller

Honorable Mention
A fish stick is like
A British man: pasty white
With a crusty shell.
—Erin Barringer

Nomenclature is
Not my specialty, but they're
Neither fish nor sticks
—Malcolm Murray

I hate the sweet ooze
that comes out of burnt fish sticks.
What the hell is it?
—Steve Murray

Went to the river
Dropped my line in the water
No fish sticks in there
—Alan Petitt

I wonder if fish
Ever thought of human sticks?
Or is that just gross?
—Leslie McMurtry

From sea to the mold
Ocean-going lollipops
More stick than a fish
—Stephen Davis

A lot of fish sticks
Going to eat all of them
Not going to share
—Ashley Encinias

Best Haiku Using the Most Letters of the Alphabet

We got a lot of variations on the old "the quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dogs" chestnut from high school typing class. Good golly, you people are lazy. Come on—this is a literary contest. We're looking for some freakin' originality, people. Leslie Rottach's haiku packed the most punch. (I think I'm going to rename my band Expunge the Jackal.) She wins a $40 certificate to the District and two passes to the Guild Cinema.

Winner
Vote counts fade from view
Zoos require mob rule they say
Expunge the jackal!
—Leslie Rottach

Honorable Mentions
Tchaikovsky zeppelin
Black xylophone quail jumper
A raw Dresden fugue
—Randy Stogsdill and Abby Dozier

Jacques' xylophone shack.
Crazy markdowns! Free french fries.
Save big at "Le Shack."
—Sue McGilpin

Best Haiku About the War in Iraq

I sure hope I'm wrong about this, but it looks like we're in for a long bloody haul that will only result in a lot more hatred toward our nation and make our country a lot less safe from terrorists. Nice work, George. Sue McGilpin encapsulated the situation best. For that, she gets a $40 certificate to Ralli's and two passes to the Guild Cinema.

Winner
Perennial lies
Spiral from the highest branch.
Deciduous Bush.
—Sue McGilpin

Honorable Mention
To fight about what
Half wants to happen and half
Do not; it's called war
—Lauren Henn (sixth grader, Sandia Prep)

Children's corpses rot
In calculated rubble.
No child left behind?
—Sue McGilpin

Waging war for oil:
Making the rich get richer
While the poor get killed.
—Tommi Lin Tejeda

We lied to invade,
Now we are stuck in Iraq!
Will we lie to leave?
—Erica Kretzmann

Bombed cemetery
Near Mosul: churning the bones
Of murdered infants
—Ron Reed

Wreck Iraq for fun.
Like the father, like the son
Buy oil and sell guns.
—Steve Bishop

Best Haiku About Your First Sexual Experience

This category seemed harmless enough when we first thought of it. Somehow, though, it ended up being enormously disturbing. Perhaps the most disturbing haiku of all was Liz' winning entry. For her creeped-out honesty, she'll receive a $40 certificate to the District and two passes to the Guild Cinema.

Winner
He bought me ice cream
Like a dentist treating me
For being so still
—Liz

Honorable Mentions
We discovered each
Other like strange lands—we saw,
We conquered; he came.
—Erin M. Daughtrey

Dumb and sweet, we were
amateurs softly cruising
Past virginity.
—MF Ward

VW Bus
Passion on high, brain on low
Baby on the way
—Stephen Davis

Fear—not of the dark—
But of the Virgin Mary
Being real pissed off.
—Linda Olen

Best Alibi Haiku

Tell us what you think of us in 17 syllables. No, really, we want to know. Don't hold back. Don't kiss our butts. We're much less insecure than we might seem. We got heaping hymns of praise along with plenty of haiku scorn. Steve Bishop seemed to best capture the essence of the Alibi, so he gets the prize, a $40 certificate to Ralli's and two passes to the Guild Cinema. (By the way, who's Dennis D. O'Leary? That name sure sounds familiar.)

Winner
So very much time,
And so many typewriters.
The monkeys did it.
—Steve Bishop

Honorably Mentions
I do not believe
The semi-nude wrestler is
Not bi-curious.
—Nora Heineman-Fleck

Officer, I swear
I wrote haiku that whole night.
Check the Alibi.
—Malcolm Murray

Eating newspaper?
Want the juiciest stories?
Try the Alibi.
—Devin Hight (Albuquerque High student)

I dream of sleeping
With Dennis D. O'Leary
And wake up screaming
—Kelsey Atherton (Albuquerque High student)

Oh, dear Alibi
Where would I be without you?
Most likely prison.
—Kelsey Atherton (Albuquerque High student)

I missed the last Crawl.
Please, put advertisement near
This Modern World.
—Robert McGoey

Weekly Alibi:
Ignoring my poems since
1992
—Robert McGoey

Best Haiku About Why You Fear a Specific Species of Farm Animal

My vote for scariest farm animal is certainly the goat, yet for whatever reason I'm also oddly attracted to our voracious, horned friends in much the same way churchgoing good girls are attracted to big smelly bikers. Oh, goat, you're soooooo bad. My daddy wouldn't like you at all. Elaine Almquist's goat poem was the best entry in a very competitive category. She wins a $40 certificate to Ralli's and two passes to the Guild Cinema.

Winner
When I was a kid
A billy goat ate my belt
And my pants fell down.
—Elaine Almquist

Honorably Mentions
The old horse took my
Fingers between his teeth, held
Tight, licked off the cheese.
—Billy Crews

Oh God! That donkey
Is humping his mom again.
Please, spare the children.
—Suzanne Barteau

Psycho tom turkey
Testosterone poisoning
Has messed up your mind
—Suzanne Barteau

Two-ton hog cornered
A full grown man and ate him
Least that's what I heard
—Amanda Kooser

Bad-ass male turkey,
Running full speed at my junk!
Who wouldn't be scared?
—Roald Dali

Goats I fear the most
They work with the government
To keep taaabs on me
—R. Singleton

What doesn't he know?
Black eyed, sentient sausage.
He judges and shames.
—Gail Miller

A methane build-up,
A lit match. Moo, moo, KABOOM!
Hey, it could happen.
—Bob Sabatini

A goat chewed off my
Pants, I walked home in a great
deal of discomfort
—Chadwick Reinicke (sixth grader, Sandia Prep)

Best Miscellaneous Haiku

Ah, miscellaneous. You win us over with your worldliness. You seduce us with your sophistication. You charm us with your wit. Gail Miller won this category, too. (That's got to be some kind of Alibi Haiku Contest record.) For that, she gets a $40 certificate to Ralli's and two passes to the Guild Cinema.

Winner
Oscar Wilde's gravestone
Is frescoed in red lip prints,
Not flowers, but breath.
—Gail Miller

Honorable Mentions
Damn thee, vile haiku:
Syllabic ineptitude,
Poetry's cheap whore.
—Jamie Larkin

This haiku knows it's
A haiku. It wants schnitzel.
It hates being so short.
—Malcolm Murray

If a cat laughed jazz
In a 3 a.m. gin joint,
Would anyone hear?
—Todd Eddy

Butter flies downward
Off the knife towards the floor
Avoiding the toast
—Doug McKinnon

Bum steps in my path
He tries to sell me a watch
Given up on time
—Shelby Anderson

10 sunflower seeds.
100 hungry sparrows.
I don't want to watch.
—Wanda Jerome

Drunken vagabond
Way overdue for a bath
Pays fare in pennies.
—Brian K. Hansen

I know two poems,
One is "the road not taken,"
The other isn't.
—Tony Santiago

The first insect bike
Race, my kitchen's Tour de Ants
Leading ... Ants Armstrong
—Jarrett Stotts (sixth grader, Sandia Prep)

Introducing spoons!
No more messes or ouchies,
Old guys can use them!
—Travis Shepherd (sixth grader, Sandia Prep)

news

Thinking Outside the Box

The proposed Wal-Mart on Wyoming and Menaul heats up the District 7 race

Wal-Mart carries with it three reputations in Albuquerque: It has really low prices, pays really low wages and every time they put in a new one, it causes quite a stir. At least when it comes to this last generality, the proposed Supercenter on Wyoming and Menaul proves to be no exception. Only this time, Wal-Mart is shaking up more than the local neighborhoods, it's wedging its way right into the District 7 race for City Council.

Which Kind of Looting Is OK?

The horror, devastation and misery of Hurricane Katrina cannot be escaped. My wife and I sit riveted in front of the television screen watching astounding images as an incredible, beautiful and very special American city, a place we had grown to love, full of people we know and care for as friends, is literally erased from existence.

Gobs O' Cash

Money, money, money in the mayor's race

With this mayoral election, lil' Albuquerque has caught up to many larger cities. Maybe it's a rite of passage in graduating from "cow town with a dollop of sleaze," as one national magazine described us in the '80s, to a spot on the "best of" lists of Forbes and Money. But unlike other milestones in our city's history, we should leave this one out of our Tricentennial celebrations.

Odds & Ends

Dateline: Hungary—A district mayor in Budapest has proposed a strict new dress code for City Hall employees, which would allow only women with “pretty legs” to wear short skirts. Gyorgy Mitnyan, the conservative mayor of the city's 12th district, is also trying to ban skirts that are shorter than 2-3 centimeters (one inch) above the knee. Budapest Mayor Gabor Demszky called the proposal simply “crass.” Demszky issued a statement to the Hungarian state news agency MTI, dismissing Mitnyan's “pretty legs” proposal. “I flatly reject the idea in the name of City Hall, which employs hundreds of women workers,” he said. The proposal is nevertheless scheduled for debate this week.

food

All the News that's Fit to Eat

From Farm to Table—The New Mexico State Fair kicks into gear this weekend, and with it comes parking-lot green chile, Navajo tacos and batter-dipped novelty foods out the yin-yang (Twinkie-on-a-stick, anyone?). But you must not—cannot—step foot off the fairgrounds without a visit to the New Mexico Country Store, located in the Agriculture Building at Expo New Mexico. The store is an ephemeral courtyard market, organized by the New Mexico Department of Agriculture and home to a statewide harvest of prized produce and cottage-industry products. It's the closest thing we've got to a culinary cross section of our state. Stop in for some apple-sweet onions or bag of blue corn-piñon pancake mix. You will not be disappointed.

Going Deep with Black Dog and the Frenchman

"Where the %$@# is the Frenchman?" growled Black Dog, pacing in front of his half-built mushroom dryer. Last news we had, the Frenchman was near Watson Lake, Yukon. When the Frenchman drops off radar, it's usually because he's armpit-deep in morels. The Frenchman's absence was doubly disturbing to Black Dog, because we weren't.

film

Reel World

Architecture on Screen—As part of Albuquerque's ongoing Tricentennial celebration, the city is sponsoring a night of short film screenings at the Guild Cinema in Nob Hill. September has been named Architecture Month, so the city has teamed with the American Institute of Architects-New Mexico to present “In Focus: Architecture in Film.” The screening will consist of three short documentaries, each concentrating on one of the architecture world's most famous figures. Antonio Gaudi (designer of Barcelona's Cathedral of the Sagrada Familia), Frank Lloyd Wright (designer of Pennsylvania's Falling Water) and Frank Geary (designer of the Walt Disney Concert Hall in Los Angeles) are the three subjects. The films are simple introductions to and interviews with the subjects at hand, so an advanced knowledge of architecture is not necessary--just an appreciation of beautiful buildings. Yours truly, Alibi's humble film editor, will be on hand to introduce the films and to give a (decidedly) uneducated perspective on the proceedings. The screening starts at 8 p.m. on Saturday, Sept. 10. The event is free and open to the public. Call 260-0571 for more info.

The Exorcism of Emily Rose

Laura Linney is “Perry Mason: Paranormal Litigator”

After a summer of stultifyingly formulaic films, it rests on the shoulders of the fall movie season to provide some relief. To give credit where credit is due, writer/director Scott Derrickson (writer of Urban Legends: Final Cut, director of Hellraiser: Inferno and lover of colons) has come up with an arguably original idea--namely, the world's first courtroom horror drama. Instead of the hoped-for Reese's Peanut Butter Cup combination of chocolate and peanut butter, however, Derrickson's film ends up as an unholy mixture of oil and water.

A State of Mind

Eye-opening look behind the Bamboo Curtain shows North Koreans just want to dance, dance, dance

According to President George W. Bush, North Korea is a founding member of the Axis of Evil. Aside from that rather broadly unhelpful description, what do we as Westerners know about the country? Well, not much, really.

Must Flee TV

Hurricane Katrina around the dial

Admit it. You treat The Weather Channel like one of those ex-boyfriends/ex-girlfriends you look up once a year when you're desperately horny and looking for a booty call. You never even think twice about The Weather Channel. OK, maybe you'll flip past it when you're going on vacation--just for a second to see if you need long or short sleeves. Other than that, you ignore it completely. Until a hurricane shows up. And then you're glued to it like weather porn.

music

Music to Your Ears

"Euphoria" and Pulse Part Ways—New Mexico's premier gothic and industrial dance party is moving on to darker pastures, so to speak. Promoter Brad Cole says that after several years at Pulse Nightclub, "Euphoria" has been dissolved, renamed and relocated to Downtown's OPM Nightclub. The move is being engineered by Cole and resident DJs Kentifyr and Church, all of whom are deeply rooted in Albuquerque's gothic and industrial scene. And like a macabre phoenix risen from its own jet-black ashes, "this night has already gone through many types of incarnations and names, and no two are ever the same," Cole says. "It's always a little different, which is a good thing."

Tiempo Libre

with Racine & Kreyol

Saturday, Sept. 10; El Rey Theatre (21-and-older): Tiempo Libre plays the type of music that makes you feel justified for spending hours with your partner taking Latin dance classes. As Tiempo's unabashedly piquant brass and layered percussion invades your eardrums, you'll want to know the proper maneuvers when your waist (through no fault of your own) starts winding this-way-and-that. If you do not have the necessary training, don't be surprised if your hips feel like shit in the morning. Tiempo plays a unique style of Cuban music called timba, which differentiates itself from most other forms of Latin music by using a full drum set, as well as the more traditional congas and timbales, to form the rhythm section. The band's latest release, Arroz Con Mango, proves the band can go low-key by utilizing lounge-ish keyboard and cooled-out percussion. The primo Tiempo cuts, however, are filled to capacity with complex arrangements and frenzied tempos that can't help but elevate your mood. Tiempo's distinctive authenticity (which stems from the fact that each of the band's seven members are originally from Cuba) has cultivated a following in such unexpected places as Southeast Asia. As for the fear of not having the right moves on the dance floor, Tiempo's bandleader and pianist Jorge Gomez offered some comforting words to the Chicago Tribune: "We're just trying to encourage people to get up and feel free; that's the secret of timba." Just bring a few ICY HOT Sleeves™ to the show and you should be fine. Call 249-7638 for ticket information.

The Posies

with The Deathray Davies and The Mindy Set

Monday, Sept. 12; The Launchpad (21-and-older), $8: After a six-year hiatus, The Posies found themselves in a recording studio in February of 2004 with three weeks to put together a full-length release. The fruits of their labor came in the form of 2005's Every Kind of Light, a beautifully crafted, 12-song LP with a level of quality that gives no indication of the album's rushed construction. EKOL most definitely does not leave the band's past work in the dust. But The Posies are careful to avoid the treacherous path traveled by some bands that erroneously cling to a past that no longer holds any creative nectar (I'm looking at you, Sonic Youth). The band takes the playfully distraught tone of Nada Surf, and combines it with Elliot Smith-ish vocals and Weezer-esque guitar to produce eccentric tracks that never lose their pop presence. The Posies are the type of musical outfit that would get their fair share of radio play if we had more than one decent goddamn radio station in this state (KUNM can only carry so much of the burden). But never mind the lack of airtime; your chance to hear The Posies live arrives on Monday. The 21-and-older show at the Launchpad will also feature Albuquerque's The Mindy Set, whose songs should complement The Posies new, more indie sound quite nicely.

Sonic Reducer

Country riffs and ballads about pretty girls, combined with '60s pop percussion and organs, create an atmosphere like that of a dance in the old high school gym. When Johnny can't muster the courage to ask Suzy to put her back into it—er, shake a leg—he huffs off to his '48 Buick to take a few swigs of hooch. Later at Inspiration Point, Johnny gets to first base. Way to go, Johnny! The Volebeats hail from Detroit, have singer/guitarist Matthew Smith in common with Outrageous Cherry and have been making country-esque pop rock since 1988. With their simplicity, lo-fi recording and tales of romantic triumph, Like Her is both nifty and swell.

Flyer on the Wall

Why the hell isn't your band's flyer here? Because you didn't post one up at alibi.com/ads, like the Ya Ya Boom Project did. They're playing an over-21 show this Saturday, Sept. 10, at Burt's with the Bellmont and the Giranimals. (LM)

A Shocking Interview with the Shock Master, Alice Cooper!

Actually, for it to really be shocking, I'd have to chop your head off

While Alice Cooper really needs no introduction, the rockstar-golfer-radio personality-sportsbar owner is still alive and purveying blood and guts in front of live audiences around the world. He and his guillotine will be visiting Albuquerque this week, and recently the Alibi was allocated 15 minutes to speak with him. Welcome to our nightmare.

art

Culture Shock

Worldly Art—The Downtown Contemporary Art Center (105 Fourth Street SW) has put together an ambitious exhibit consisting entirely of artists from Korea—53 of them, to be exact. The Downtown art space will host the exhibit through the end of the month. For details, call 242-1983.

Worshipping Mammon

Donkey Gallery

Don't lend Chad Person any money. The UNM art graduate has created arresting images from shredded American dollar bills. An exhibit featuring some of his latest work opens at the Donkey Gallery (1415 Fourth Street SW) this Friday, Sept. 9, with a reception from 6 to 9 p.m. Person explores the spirituality of material goods and the American obsession with monetary wealth and material accumulation. Friday also marks the one-year anniversary of the Donkey Gallery, so there's an added reason to celebrate. For details, call 242-7504.

Comedie of Erors

Adobe Theater

The Adobe Theater presents Comedie of Erors (yes, it's intentionally misspelled), a comedy by William Shakespeare running Sept. 9 through Oct. 2. Directed by Rick Wiles, the play explores identity theft among two pairs of twins. They unknowingly come upon each other in the same town after years of separation. Chaotic multiple-identity madness ensues. The Adobe Theater is located at 9813 Fourth Street NW. For dates, times and ticket prices, call 898-9222.

Hometown Heroes

The Albuquerque Slam Team

The children's eyes shimmer
Even after they realize
the world won't
—Cuffee

The Mind's Temple

An interview with Judy Norsigian, author of Our Bodies, Ourselves

Some people might say the women's health movement began with a book. It wasn't a particularly fancy document—no smooth pages filled with colored illustrations or shiny, plastic cover. But it was pivotal to the way that many women, over the last 35 years, would come to understand their bodies.