Alibi V.14 No.46 • Nov 17-23, 2005

feature

The Spirit of Getting

Step-by-step instructions on where to buy the perfect gift for your favorite Alibi staff member(s)

People always make such a big stink about how important it is to focus on the wants and needs of others during the Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, pagan-winter-solstice season. We at the Alibi are tired of this stale approach to the holidays. The way we see it, we're generous and giving the rest of the year. Now it's payback time. In other words, instead of focusing on buying gifts for others, this year we've decided to focus entirely on assisting others in buying desirable gifts for us.

Christie Chisholm, Managing Editor/News Editor

There's nothing sexier than a good pen (at least to a writer). Sure, $95 seems like a lot of money to spend on such an item, but it'll last forever, improve your handwriting and ... damn, it just feels so good. This particular pen has been luring me in for weeks—forcing me to drop in unexpectedly to admire it, feel for my wallet, then hesitantly turn away. I did chose one of the priciest pens at the store (most are well-under $100), but who cares?—I deserve it! Of course, Papers! is the kind of place I'd be happy to get anything from. If the pen's too burdensome on your checkbook, you could also buy me a Moleskine notebook or a nice set of stationary, which would be more than satisfactory. And don't forget to pick me up a nice card while you're there—that way I'll know where to send my thank-you note.

Amy Dalness, Calendars Editor

I've been training in Tang Soo Do for nearly three years now and actually learning how to use a sword is still a few years away, but a girl can dream. This wooden Bokken would make an awesome training tool for when I finally reach my black belt. Until then, it will make a great outlet for my frustration against an unsuspecting pillow. It's also much better than giving me a piece of sharp metal, which would most likely result in a few trips to the ER. It would also protect me during the long, scary walk to my car after work, which is often full of ninja-like action. A Bokken would really give me an edge against those nunchuck-wielding fiends. OK, I made that up. How about this: I want it; give it to me or I'll kick your butt. Better logic?

Devin D. O'Leary, Film Editor

Now I can get drunk ... on national pride! What self-respecting Irishman wouldn't love this attractive hip flask complete with pewter inset Celtic knot pattern? It's functional (comes complete with funnel) and holds a generous amount of whisky (for you Scots) or whiskey (for you Irishmen). Among the other Celtic treasures (CDs, books, jewelry, bagpipe accessories), Bally Dun is also an official licenser of Guinness merchandise. Sláinte.

Jessica Cassyle Carr, Staff Writer

When your body, home or office needs adornment, Mariposa is the place to go. Under new ownership, the store sells jewelry and fine arts and crafts in a varying price range, all made by local artists. So, because pretty much all of my dishes are ugly, what I really want in the New Year is art in my cupboard. Both of these ceramic items are functional, so they can be both decorative and used to serve food and drink.

Steven Robert Allen, Editor/Arts & Lit Editor

For whatever reason, I enjoy making a racket. I haven't always been this way. When I was a kid I had a fairly reserved personality—a wallflower type, so to speak. In my teens, though, I discovered the sinful pleasure of distorted electric guitars, and as an adult I've moved on to other ways to pollute the sonic space around me.

Laura Marrich, Music/Food Editor

It's been proven that the drunker you get, the more wildly you gesticulate. And no one knows that unfortunate fact better than Riedel, a company that has been manufacturing top-notch wineglasses for 11 generations or so. Enter the "O." These wineglasses are sensual and sturdy, with a stemless design that resists tipsy tip-overs—and they look and feel just wonderful when cradled in the palm your hand. I like the big, mouthy design of the Pinot/Nebbiolo tumbler, but the "O" series comes in several shapes and sizes that are designed to complement popular varietals like Cabernet/Merlot, Syrah/Shiraz, Chardonnay, Viognier/Chardonnay and Riesling/Sauvignon (each at varying prices). I'll take two of each, please.

Simon McCormack, Alibi Freelancer

This (admittedly trendy) item is the best way to remember the tragedy that was the 2004 Presidential Election. It features 299 minutes of raw, in-your-face “Daily Show” action, including coverage of the Democratic and Republican National Conventions, election night coverage and a bunch of other bonus material like audio commentaries, an introduction by Jon Stewart and original segments with the Daily Show's correspondents. It's just what I need to get psyched for '08 when the Democrats will have another enormous tool that I can reluctantly vote for. (Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid, anyone?)

news

Working on the Railroad

After years of deliberation, the wheels may finally be turning on a project to redevelop Albuquerque's historic railyard

In the late 1800s, railroad executives chose to locate their regional hub here in Albuquerque, transforming what was then a small, rural town into the territory's commercial center. The railyards remained in operation until after World War II when the automobile dramatically diminished the role of trains in transport. For decades, the scene of what was once the city's financial engine has been more or less vacant. Over the past several years, as redevelopment has become more and more likely, the huge, valuable piece of land, which lies in the heart of the city between First Street and Broadway bordering Downtown and the South Valley, has been a cause of local curiosity and concern.

Winding Down

Albuquerque's 16th Council met for the next to last time on Nov. 7. Councilors Sally Mayer and Miguel Gómez were absent.

To Find Out What's Really Going on in Iraq ...

Ask a woman from Santa Fe

To find out what's really going on in Iraq, you could talk to soldiers who've been there. I met one of the soldiers injured in the explosion shown in Michael Moore's Fahrenheit 911, the one where a bomb goes off in a tree. Like other returning veterans I've tried to draw out, the most detail I got from him was, “It's worse than you can imagine.”

Odds & Ends

Dateline: Bosnia—A hand grenade being used in a game of catch exploded early last Saturday killing three youths in the town of Novi Grad. Two of the youths, aged 19 and 20, one of them from neighboring Croatia, were killed instantly while a 20-year-old woman died on the way to the hospital, police said. The woman's sister was slightly injured while two other youths suffered serious injuries. The explosion occurred at 2 a.m. in the Novi Grad town center, an area frequented by the town's young population. ONASA news agency quoted witnesses as saying the youths tossed the hand grenade back and forth to each other before it exploded in the hands of one of them.

food

The Dish

Beaujolais and Beyond—At one minute past midnight on the third Thursday of each November, a million cases of Beaujolais Nouveau—a young Beaujolais wine made from Gamay grapes—begin their yearly journey to every wine-consuming corner of the world. This Thursday (for many of you, that means today) marks the hotly-awaited release date for the Beaujolais Nouveau, and with it, an international excuse to party. Look for tasting parties at many of your favorite local restaurants, including St. Clair Winery & Bistro (243-9916), Great American Land & Cattle Co. (292-1510), Graze by Jennifer James and Gulp (268-4729) and De la Tierra up in Taos (505-737-9855).

The Wonderful Wines of New Mexico

Get your holiday spirits locally

Nothing says holiday love like a good bottle of wine. It can be red, white, blush or sparkling, but try having a party without any—you'll miss that sweet, tart or bubbly grape goodness after a few rounds of Amstel Light.

film

Reel World

Made-Up Movies—On Friday, Nov. 18, Gorilla Tango Theater will present its very first “Cinema Loco” event. Billed as “improv goes to the movie,” the evening will feature a classic Hollywood film (in this case, 1936's Reefer Madness). Audiences are asked to give the film a new title, and it's up to the talented members of Gorilla Tango's improv cast to dub all-new dialogue for the film. None of the players have seen the movie in advance, making each show a never-to-be-repeated comedy event. The show starts at 10 p.m. Gorilla Tango is located at 519 Central NW.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

Fourth film knows how to make magic on screen

“Dark and difficult times lie ahead,” warns the tagline of the newest Harry Potter film. As longtime fans of the book series know, truer words were never spoken. The young wizard and his pals are in for a very dark and very difficult time in this, the fourth filmed excursion into J.K. Rowling's mega-popular fantasy universe.

“The Apprentice: Martha Stewart” on NBC

Martha's catchphrase bites her on the ass

I hate to be the one to say it, Martha, but you just don't fit in. Not on NBC, anyway.

It seems that, after a season of steadily slipping ratings, “The Apprentice: Martha Stewart” is being phased out. NBC has apparently decided not to bring back domestic diva Martha Stewart to host another season of her poorly received “Apprentice” spin-off. NBC executives said that it had always been their intention to air only a single season of “The Apprentice: Martha Stewart”--which is probably news to Martha who, only a few weeks ago, was bragging to Fortune magazine that producers of “The Apprentice” were thinking of kicking Donald Trump off his own show and replacing him with her.

music

Music to Your Ears

Your Name in Lights Heads West—With a name like Your Name in Lights, your options are pretty well-laid out for you: Either rise to the top of rock and roll celebrity, or face fading away into the mired bog of bitterness and unfulfilled dreams. Thankfully, it's looking more and more like the former for these Burque-based hard-core kids—especially since they've been selected to play in the Ernie Ball Battle of the Bands, to be held in December at the Key Club in Hollywood. YNIL will compete against four other bands, whittled down from a jaw-dropping10,000 groups that had initially entered the first round of competition. Perhaps even more incredible is the fact that YNIL has been playing together for just one year—one year! Unbelievable. For more information on the Battle, contact battle@ernieball.com.

Oscillate Wildly

The Oscillation Festival revels in electronic music from New Mexico

The Oscillation Festival, New Mexico's only local electronic music showcase, will launch into its fifth year this Friday, Nov. 18, at Downtown Albuquerque's Cell Theatre (700 First Street NW). The all-ages festival will feature roughly 12 electronic acts from the Albuquerque and Santa Fe area. Performances will be broken into conceptually exciting "vs."-style sets, where teams of musicians go head-to-head on the same stage—with the same equipment and songs—in what promoter Kent Wilhelmi calls "a demonstration of all-out audio warfare." Not only that, Oscillation sets out to capture the somewhat broad diversity of New Mexico's growing electronic music scene, from synthpop to dark ambient and noize. Confirmed acts include Autopoesis, Brian Botkiller, Diverje, Enigmatik, Leiahdorus, Noir Effect, Ohmniscience, RAM, Unnatural Element, The Wake 6, Vertigo Venus and Wurm. The Alibi recently caught up with Wilhelmi (AKA DJ Kentifyr) for a quick tour of Albuqerque's electronic happenings.

A Static Lullaby

with Haste the Day, Halifax, Scary Kids Scaring Kids and Bedlight for Blue Eyes

Monday, Nov. 21, 7 p.m.; Launchpad (all-ages): Many a time, I've found myself wondering whether bands like My Chemical Romance, Midtown and New Found Glory are really that broken up about, say, not being invited to prom or knowing the girl they have a crush on is dating a jerk. Until they released Faso Latido, A Static Lullaby could have been grouped in with these overly dramatic ensembles. Their debut And Don't Forget to Breathe smacks of forced emotion and unsubstantiated rage and sorrow. With Faso, however, A Static Lullaby has learned that it isn't how loud you scream that's most important, but when and what you choose to scream about that makes all the difference in the screamo universe. Without exactly mellowing out, ASL has matured and polished themselves up to the point where they seem less like immature, pubescent pansies and more like grown adults with a knack for screaming-cum-melody. Meanwhile, Joe Brown's lyrics have come a long way; focusing less on his own broken heart and more on large-scale devastation. Also apparent on Faso is the band's increased adeptness with their instruments, from the scratchy, layered guitar on down. After opening for The Used, Killswitch Engage and Senses Fail on the "Taste of Chaos Tour," the vastly improved ASL is swinging through the Duke City to headline an all-ages show at the Launchpad. Screamo fans looking for genuine angst will not be disappointed.

Flyer on the Wall

Get cozy with Rocksquawk.com all-stars Five Minute Sin, Simfonik Plague, Third Hour, 7 of 9, Nunchuk and Holiday Sail. Launchpad doors open at 8 p.m. on Wednesday, Nov. 23. $3 gets you in, but you've gotta be 21-or-older. Squawk on! (LM)

The Hard Lessons

hosted by The Dirty Novels with special guests The Gracchi and The Fab Jim Phillips Show

Thursday, Nov. 17 : Winning Coffee (all-ages), $5: Detroit has done it again. Another in a long line of innovative rock purist ensembles has made a name for themselves on the national scene. In this case, The Hard Lessons take guitar-driven rock with soulful organ and sultry vocals and combine it with a "let the good times roll" mentality indicative of a band that knows the world is going to hell, but has taken enough hydrocodone to make it a non-issue. With names like Agostino Visocchi and Korin Cox, one might think that THL is composed of ultra-hip ex-MTV VJs, but their sound is not so much chic as down-to-earth and playful. THL has gained tons o' critical acclaim for their latest release, Gasoline. The album has also helped firmly place the band in the indie genre, despite having elements of soul and garage rock in their repertoire. The Hard Lessons will bring their sadistically warm and fuzzy sound to Winning Coffee on Thursday, for an all-ages show hosted by Albuquerque favorites The Dirty Novels. Rest assured, this will not be your typical, low-caliber coffee shop performance.

The 17th Annual Western Music Association International Awards Show and Festival

Although we live in the heart of the Wild West, cowboys that ride off into the sunset are not something often seen in the bustling metropolis of Albuquerque. The days of cattle drives, roping steers and whistling Dixie are all but a memory here. But one look up to the stars proves that spirit is still alive. We can still see them; the city has not grown too big to block them out.

art

Culture Shock

Twinkles, Twinkles—Bandelier Elementary is hosting its Holiday Shop and Stroll this Saturday, Nov. 19, from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Vendors will be offering everything from clothing to toys to educational gifts to jewelry to other locally made products, making this an ideal opportunity to pick up some one-of-a-kind gifts. Carleen Lopez will be hawking her unique saris. Rudy J. Miera will be selling retablos. Folk artist Steve White will be on hand with an array of custom-made PEZ dispensers. I'm told Twinkles the Clown will be making an appearance as well, and there should be plenty of food. Bandelier is located at 3309 Pershing SE, half a block or so from Hyder Park. For more information, call Sarah Saenz at 977-8881.

Meat Puppets

The Higher the Marble Content, The Better the Meat at Bivouac Artspace

I've seen Tracy Stuckey's art around town and always assumed he was a she. It wasn't until I visited his current solo show at the Bivouac Artspace that I learned this is not the case.

Wall Scrawl

Downtown Contemporary Art Center

Capping off 2005, the Downtown Contemporary Art Center (105 Fourth Street SW) presents a new exhibit highlighting local artists with a flair for urban aesthetics, including Derick Montez, Phillip Orozco, Mike Giant, Logan Demas, Betty Dore, Rob Rael, Lynn Johnson and several others. With everything from aerosol art to ornamented skateboard decks, Wall Scrawl should be a killer show. The exhibit opens this Friday, Nov. 18, with a reception from 5 to 9 p.m. catered by Downtown Java Joe's. If you can't swing by that evening, Wall Scrawl will remain on display through Dec. 30. For more information, call 242-1983.

Tartuffe

Vortex Theatre

Subtitled The Impostor, Moliere's play Tartuffe tells the tale of a religious hypocrite who cheats a rube out of his worldly belongings. A new production of the play, translated by former poet laureate Richard Wilbur and directed by John Hardman, opens this weekend at The Vortex Theatre (2004 1/2 Central SE). Staged in modern dress, this comedy is as timely now as it was when first penned over three centuries ago. Fridays and Saturdays at 8 p.m. $10 general, $8 students/seniors. Sundays at 6 p.m. $8. Runs through Dec. 11. 247-8600.

Think Global, Buy Local

New Mexico Books and More

Great ideas are worth repeating. Last year, New Mexico presses and authors—led by local publisher LPD Press—pooled their resources to rent a storefront in Cottonwood Mall during the holiday shopping season. The creative gamble paid off. The co-op got massive local media coverage and ended up selling over 3,400 books in 40 days.

Alibi V.14 No.45 • Nov 10-16, 2005

feature

Alibi Holiday Film Guide

Stuffing your Thanksgiving turkey (and your Christmas stocking) full of cinematic goodness

Let's be honest: Summer movie season was filled with crap. Expensive crap. Expensive, unwatchable crap. Sahara, xXx 2: State of the Union, Kingdom of Heaven, The Longest Yard, Bewitched, Fantastic Four, The Island, Stealth, The Dukes of Hazzard, The Sound of Thunder. Pee-yew, what a line-up.

film

Reel World

Hendren Night—Aaron Hendren, New Mexico's “most beloved and best-looking filmmaker” (his press release, not my words), will be saluting himself by screening a series of shorts at the Santa Fe Film Center on Tuesday, Nov. 15. Short films to be screened include “Stuck,” “How to Make Friends and Be Popular,” “Lentigo” and “Fetish.” Hendren is currently focussing on making a feature film and this one-time-only screening promises to expose audiences to his no-budget work with “guns, fish, tattoos and the occasional masking-tape bikini.” The screening gets underway at 7:45 p.m. The Santa Fe Film Center is located at the former Cinemacafe site (1616 St. Michael's Drive in Santa Fe). For more information, log on to www.santafefilmfestival.com/filmcenter or visit Hendren's home page at www.eggmurders.com.

Zathura

Space-age fantasy rockets kids and adults through a picture-book world

As many people in the know (read: parents with kids) are probably aware, Zathura is a sequel to 1995's hit fantasy film Jumanji. Both are based on the awe-inspiring picture book worlds of children's author/illustrator Chris Van Allsburg (whose work also inspired the movie The Polar Express).

What About Me: The Rise Of The Nihilist Spasm Band

For nearly four decades the Nihilist Spasm Band has been either alienating or awing brave audiences with noise. From swingin' London, Ontario, they are the inventors of noise as art and claim that they are the uncles of punk rock. The members (who are actual nihilists) got together in 1966 using an amalgam of instruments and improvisation. Over the years, the band collected and fashioned relative oddities from customized intruments made from PVC pipe, kazoos (some attached to megaphones), violins, guitars and pots and pans. In appropriate nihilist form, the band regards none of the instruments as "precious." Instead, they are sources of noise and are subsequently abused as such. What results is cacophony beyond comprehension. While admitting that it is and was sometimes terrible, the NSB became an entity that did not attempt to create music for enjoyment; rather, it created noise as an affront to order and society, its members seemingly taking delight in offending people.

Jarhead

Arresting, eye-opening chronicle of life as a soldier finds war funny, sad, good and bad

There's a moment early on in Jarhead, Sam Mendes' blackly comic adaptation of Anthony Swofford's warts-and-all book about active duty during the first Gulf War, that sets the stage for what's to come. A group of eager young Marine recruits are suffering through the sort of exhausting, screaming, nose-to-the-mud military training we've come to expect since Full Metal Jacket. During a brief break, the soldiers take in a movie, Francis Ford Copolla's seminal Apocalypse Now. It's the scene with the helicopters. As the attack choppers swoop in, Wagner's “Ride of the Valkyries” kicks in. The Marines are going nuts. They're screaming, cheering, humming along with the soundtrack, aping every movement, every line of dialogue. This is their idea of war. And they love it. But, just as things are about to get good, the film is cut off. The lights come on. Saddam Hussein's troops have invaded Kuwait, and it's time to ship out. The fantasy is over.

Redneck Redemption

“My Name is Earl” on NBC

“My Name is Earl” may be the best new show on television this season. Which is convenient, because NBC needs a hit like New Orleans needs wet/dry vacs.

music

Music to Your Ears

Music from the Windchime—Downtown's Windchime Champagne Gallery (518 Central SW) has hosted several nights of music since they opened in March of this year, but this Friday, Nov. 11, will mark a first-time collaboration between the gallery and Neal Copperman's innovative AMP concert series. The AMP Listening Room will feature national bluegrass/Americana group The Greencards, whose recent work includes the new Dualtone release Weather and Water and an opening slot on last summer's Bob Dylan/Willie Nelson tour, will be the first national act to play the Windchime. The show starts at 7:30 p.m. Get your $12 advance tickets from neal@abqmusic.com, or at the door for $15.

Danny Winn and the Earthlings CD Release Party

Skank your way to a brighter tomorrow

It seems like ages ago when Giant Steps was playing all-ages shows at Spotlights next to the Highland Theatre and even longer still since the Mighty Mighty Bosstones' "The Impression That I Get" was receiving nearly nonstop radio play. But those who long for the good old days of ska supremacy (or at least mainstream success) should take a listen to Danny Winn and the Earthlings' And the Mission Begins for a peppy reminder of why they should wear their checkered hats with pride.

One For Hope CD Release Party

with Over It, Someday and Lydia

Friday, Nov. 11, 6 p.m.; Launchpad (all-ages): One For Hope releases a new CD today. With a little help from the Alibi, they're here to tell you all about it.

Flyer on the Wall

Several bands. Two venues. One man to split between them all. Come Downtown and celebrate all that is Noelan on Friday, Nov. 11, at Burt's Tiki Lounge (with Romeo Goes To Hell, The Roustabouts, Summerbirds In The Cellar and The Bellmont) and Atomic Cantina (with Oktober People, The Rip Torn and Cub of Heroic Bear). 10 p.m. 21-and-over. (LM)

Music on the Big Screen

It's music to your eyeballs

Beginning this Thursday, the Guild Cinema will continue its popular Music on the Big Screen series with two weeks of music-related films. The program will showcase five documentaries that have never before been screened in Albuquerque. Here's the run-down.

The Samples

Friday, Nov. 12, 9:30 p.m.; Puccini's Golden West Saloon (21-and-over): I imagine that if The Samples had been around in the '60s, they'd either have made it big or just gotten lost in the love. Not that they really fit into that category, or any real category, for that matter. They've described themselves as "world-beat pop rock." I think they're more happy, trans-reality, melodic soft rock (and would go great with a light, fruity drink).

Sonic Reducer

Rock epic. There is no other phrase that can describe what Coheed and Cambria has accomplished in every album they've released. Good Apollo listens like a classic novel reads. It introduces you into Coheed's world and keeps you there. Intrigued, captivated, blown away by the arena-rock riffs. Yes, arena rock. Coheed and Cambria leaves nothing behind, and with a title like Good Apollo ... how could they? This album is big, it's loud and it's far from simple. It's even got cheerleaders for crying out loud! Oh, and Claudio Sanchez has the voice of a rock god.

news

The Two Towers

The city is accused of violating the same ordinance that was the focus of the Sunport Observation Deck fiasco

Old habits die hard. At least, that's what City Councilor Debbie O'Malley might say, who's at the forefront of a debate over whether or not the city has violated the same ordinance that was the focus of the Sunport Observation Deck scandal of 1997.

How to Make Crusades Obsolete

Two new books give an alternative to war

Two books came across my desk recently, both of which argue convincingly that waging war over religious differences is not inevitable. Apparently, we have alternatives to endlessly squabbling over which tribe of His children God really loves best. Who would have known?

Dude—Where's My School?

It's time developers chipped in for schools

Don't get me wrong. I'm not against portable classrooms. They get you outdoors for some fresh air. They have that trailer-park charm. They're great places to hide under if you need to get away. But 57 on one campus? That's how many portables belong to Edward Gonzales Elementary on the southwest mesa.

Odds & Ends

Dateline: Philippines—The environmental organization Greenpeace announced last Tuesday that it would pay nearly $7,000 in damages after its flagship, the Rainbow Warrior II, smashed into a coral reef in the Tubbataha National Marine Park. Greenpeace officials said the incident at the United Nations world heritage site was “very regrettable,” but laid part of the blame on inaccurate maritime charts. Officials at the marine park assessed the area of damaged reef at 113 square yards and valued it at 384,000 pesos. The Rainbow Warrior II's visit to the reefs in the Sulu Sea was part of a four-month tour to Australia, China, the Philippines and Thailand to raise local awareness about global warming. The ship suffered no serious damage.

art

Culture Shock

Undue Process—In Chris Tugwell's X-Ray, an Australian man is imprisoned for three years without charge, and no one, including the man himself, has any idea what crime he might have committed. X-Ray is based on a true story. The American premiere of Tugwell's play occurs right here in Albuquerque at Gorilla Tango (519 Central NW). The show runs Fridays and Saturdays at 7 p.m. through Nov. 19. $10. Tickets can be purchased at the door or online at gorillatango.com. 245-8600.

Mother Nature's Daughters

Cheryl Dietz and Shawn Turung at the Harwood Art Center

Flying over the Midwest is like flying over some kind of exotic earth-toned board game. The roads all run north-south and east-west at precise right angles. In the spaces in between, every spare inch of soil seems to have been transformed into perfectly rectangular plots of farmland.

La Puerta de la Pinta

Sol Arts

Prison art has been a hip commodity for decades, but it isn't always easy to gain access to the real deal. The folks at Sol Arts (712 Central SE) have put together a rare show of work by incarcerated artists Mark A. Montoya, Marro Vasquez, Aaron Martinez, Mario Perez-Barrera, LonGino Garcia, Pedro Gonzalez and Raymond E. Garduño. In conjunction with the exhibit, the gallery will host a criminal justice panel discussion on Saturday, Nov. 19, at 1 p.m. with speakers from the ACLU, PB&J Family Services, Dismas House and the Alice King Family Center. The exhibit runs through Nov. 27. Sol Arts is open Fridays from 2 to 8 p.m. and one hour before performances. 244-0049.

Frogz

Popejoy Hall

Yank the kiddies away from the Nintendo for a few hours and haul their little butts over to UNM's Popejoy Hall. On Sunday, Nov. 13, at 3:30 p.m., Imago Theatre will perform Frogz, a funny, mystifying show filled with illusions, giant slinkies, penguins, and lots and lots of frogs. Critics and audiences from coast to coast have showered this visually spectacular show with praise since it first debuted on Broadway in 2000. Anyone over the age of 4 should enjoy this one. Tickets are $19, $22 and $25. Order by calling 925-5858 or going to www.unmtickets.com.

An American in Venice

John Berendt returns with a long-awaited follow-up to Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil

Several years ago, Publisher's Weekly reported that John Berendt had single-handedly boosted tourism in Savannah, Ga., by 46 percent, all thanks to his 1994 blockbuster, Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil. "The figure was actually higher than that," says the 65-year-old author now. Not one for false modesty, Berendt sounds like he might want royalties on the gift-shop purchases, too.

food

All the News That's Fit to Eat

Have You Eaten at Bumble Bee's Baja Grill Yet?—Well, you should. The award-winning Santa Fe import has been around for five weeks in Albuquerque, and Duke City converts are swarming around the new spot at San Mateo and Montgomery. Bumble Bee's food is fast-casual Californian/Mexican that uses no lard, MSG, freezers or microwaves. It's similar in concept to California's Baja Fresh chain—right down to the self-serve salsa bar—but without the corporate heebie-jeebies. It's 100-percent local and seriously good eats. Watch for a second Bumble Bee's in Albuquerque, set to open in Nob Hill at the start of 2006.

Pho Linh

Seven degrees of beef

Burque beefaholics finally have an opportunity to unite for a good cause: consuming beef seven ways and supporting an as-yet-unknown new local restaurant, Pho Linh. For local lovers of great Vietnamese food, this place is like finding a diamond in your sandal.

Let's Get Popping!

A D.I.Y. primer on popcorn

Films are just fine on their own, but every movie needs a big, buttery dish of snacks to really make it pop. Warm and light, salty and crackling under the kernel-busting pressure of your teeth, popcorn is best enjoyed when not-so-delicately shoved in the general direction of your mouth. Go ahead; ram it in by the handful. The flickering darkness of the theater makes it possible to eat like a total ape, even if you are in public. Just pray you can make it through the trailers with a few crumbs to spare.

Food Events

Voted Best Restaurant in Santa Fe in our 2005 Readers' Choice Restaurant Poll, Geronimo is internationally admired for the culinary mastery of Executive Chef Eric DiStefano. And thanks to the release of Geronimo: Fine Dining in Santa Fe in August 2004 (coauthored by Geronimo owner Cliff Skoglund and published by Ten Speed Press; $50), even home cooks can find themselves sitting at DiStefano's eclectic global table whenever the mood strikes.

Alibi V.14 No.44 • Nov 3-9, 2005

feature

The Alibi's Worry Issue

Stop it! You're freaking me out!

No offense to Bob Marley, but if you don't worry about a thing, if you really think every little thing's going to be all right, then you're smoking something a lot stronger than plain old Mary Jane. The world's a scary place, and it's getting scarier with each passing month. Sure, we've put Halloween, Dia de los Muertos and a creepy city election behind us, but we here at the Alibi sincerely believe the worst is yet to come.

The Worry Wheel

Spin your way to a worry-filled day

With so much worrisome activity in the world today, it's getting harder and harder to determine what's merely a source of concern and what's really worth worrying about. Stop waffling over your worries: Let the Alibi Worry Wheel take all the guesswork out of fretting. From the apocalypse to pinkeye, we've got 32 of your favorite neurotic obsessions in one convenient little spinner. Keep one at home, in the car and at the office—you'll never be far from something to worry about!

A Glossary of Phobias

Arachibutyrophobia—fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth
Dishabiliophobia—fear of undressing in front of someone
Medomalacuphobia—fear of losing an erection
Papaphobia—fear of the Pope
Politicophobia—fear of politicians
Anablephobia—fear of looking up
Anuptaphobia—fear of staying single
Autodysomophobia—fear of one that has a vile odor
Coulrophobia—fear of clowns
Eremophobia—fear of being oneself
Euphobia—fear of hearing good news
Hellenologophobia—fear of Greek terms or complex scientific terminology
Metrophobia—fear of poetry
Optophobia—fear of opening your eyes
Phagophobia—fear of being eaten
Phalacrophobia—fear of becoming bald
Pteronophobia—fear of being tickled by feathers
Soceraphobia—fear of parents-in-law
Source: phobialist.com

Deadly Bugs

Creepy, crawly, creepy, crawly, creepy, creepy, crawly, crawly, creepy, creepy, crawly, crawly

No matter how many times someone reassuringly tells you, "most insects aren't poisonous," or "they're more scared of you than you are of them," their advice doesn't seem to resonate whenever a bug of some sort crawls up your leg, flies into your mouth or is located anywhere near your general vicinity. The truth is, you have good reason to be terrified of bugs.

Fun with Diseases

Let's do the Hypochondriac Shuffle, shall we?

Necrotizing Fasciitis—This disease, which involves a type of flesh-eating bacteria, can affect many parts of the body but usually is found in the extremities. It's characterized by, among other things, unexplained fever, inflammation of the infected area and raised lesions filled with purple or blue fluid. Early detection is key because the disease can spread very easily to other parts of the body. Still, it's probably not a good idea to rush to the hospital every time you have an unexplained fever or a rash. But may we suggest instead gouging away any suspicious-looking flesh with a pocketknife or other sharp object?

The Truth is Out There

A few of our favorite conspiracy websites

www.conspiracyplanet.com
Features conspiracy topics regarding 9/11, anthrax, genetic engineering and much, much more.

www.bvalphaserver.com
Includes articles on UFOs, cloning, chemical weapons and more.

www.theinsider.org
Conspiracies from the past and present, including our government's current hidden agenda and Christopher Columbus' web of lies.

www.freemasonrywatch.org
Conspiracies related to the Free Masons.

www.conspiracyarchive.com
Articles on World War II and United Nations hoaxes as well as a section dedicated to microchips implanted in people's brains.

www.batesmotel.8m.com
A site entirely dedicated to proving that we never landed on the moon.

www.mcadams.posc.mu.edu/sites.htm
Discusses the various theories about who really shot JFK.

www.museumofhoaxes.com
Features a forum where conspiracy theorists can chat about whatever is on their mind. No topic is too out-there or farfetched.

www.topsitelists.com/bestsites/conspire/
A ranking of over 20 conspiracy sites. (Scroll down.)

21st Century Thieves

For all you know, your identity has already been stolen

It happened to Sandra Bullock in 1995's classic action thriller, The Net, so why can't it happen to you? Think your boring life can't erode into a murderous web of lies, accented with spontaneous explosions, perpetrated by some conniving thief? Think again.

music

Music to Your Ears

Rocksquawk: More Rock, Less Walk—The Alibi and Rocksquawk.com will again team up for another blissfully unpretentious night of local music; only this time you can enjoy the onslaught of Rocksquawkin' bands from a single barstool, perfectly contoured to fit the delicate curvature of your rump. On Wednesday, Nov. 23, we'll stuff the Launchpad tighter than a Thanksgiving turkey with live, local music ripped right from the forums of Albuquerque's premier internet music community, Rocksquawk.com. The idea is to throw a Rocksquawk show every month; each will highlight talent from the Albuquerque music scene and Rocksquawk.com, and each will draw audiences to a single venue that will change from show to show. This month it's at the Launchpad. Next month, who knows? Of course, we'll continue to organize the multi-venue Rocksquawk.com Music Showcases once or twice a year; and the Fall and Spring Crawls are as sure as the seasons. This is just another opportunity for local bands to come out and strut their stuff. And admission will be free or cheap so we can get a good audience base for these guys. Unfortunately, the inaugural event will be for 21-and-over audiences only, but I'd like to see some all-ages Rocksquawk.com shows in the near future. We'll see how it goes. See you on Nov. 23!

Bobo Stenson Trio

Swedish pianist/composer Bobo Stenson first came into prominence in the late '60s, accompanying jazz greats Gary Burton, Sonny Rollins and Stan Getz. He soon collaborated with Norwegian saxophonist Jan Garbarek, whose chamber music style of jazz contributed immeasurably to the success of Officium, his chart-topping otherworldly excursion with The Hilliard Ensemble.

The Build

All the rock; none of the groin thrusts

"Having (a singer) would add another interesting element to the group, but not at the expense of having one that sucks." So says Tim Dempsey, guitarist for the all-instrumental indie band The Build, and there are quite a few bands who should listen in.

Flyer on the Wall

Snugfit Social Club returns to the Launchpad at 10 p.m. this Friday, Nov. 11, with a magnificent aural display of electro, new wave and disco. $4 gets you in, but only if you're 21 or older. (LM)

The Planet The

Sunday, Nov. 11; the Launchpad (21-and-over), $4: If helmets are the new mullets, then The Planet The is the new medium in which to spastically dance while sporting one.

food

All the News That's Fit to Eat

Chow's Asian Bistro Bellies Up to the Westside—Another sister-restaurant of Chow's Asian Bistro (Santa Fe) and Chow's Chinese Bistro (Northeast Heights) will open its doors in Cottonwood Mall this weekend. That's three locations, three companies, two names and one owner. Confused yet? "It's complicated" says General Manager Jason Zeng. "But all that's just legal stuff. They're basically all part of the same place." Zeng started his career at the restaurant when it first opened 13 years ago in Santa Fe; only then it was called Chow's Contemporary Chinese Food. "We're local, not a corporation. Our highest concentration is on food quality and taste." And Zeng is willing to put his money where his mouth is. Earlier this month, Chow's was voted one of the top 100 Asian restaurants and the No. 1 Asian fusion restaurant in the nation by the National Restaurant Association and the Chinese Restaurant News. That's a big deal.

Lollicup

A shiny, happy tea shop at Ta-Lin

It's shiny, happy teatime for patrons of the Ta-Lin world market. Lollicup, the bright and shopper-friendly café next door, offers a quick retro relaxation stop with a modest menu and a mile-long list of teas, hot or cold, for the most sophisticated sippers.

news

Brewing a Controversy

A New Mexico-based case over whether a religion can legally use a hallucinogenic tea has made its way to the Supreme Court

It all began in 1999, when federal narcotics agents stormed Jeffrey Bronfman's Santa Fe church, confiscating 30 gallons of a psychoactive Brazilian tea he planned to use in religious ceremonies. Now this week, after five years of litigation, the debate over the sacramental brew has reached the nation's highest court.

Albuquerque Journal Plays Matchmaker

Perhaps Albuquerque The Magazine can be forgiven for their ridiculous October feature, “The Second Annual Hot Singles of Albuquerque Issue,” because, while laughable (the expression, ’hot singles,' itself is laughable), the local periodical is a lifestyle magazine. It serves the purpose of indulging readers in this sort of entertainment. So silly questions like, “If your ideal partner were a New Mexican dish, what would she be and why?” and likewise, non sequitur answers such as, “A combination plate, classy in public and adventurous when we're alone” are within the realm of reasonable editorial content.

Mind the Gap

A recent study shows the U.S. gender gap isn't as small as we thought

I was dancing and sipping a caipirinha—you know, that fabulous Brazilian cocktail made with lime and sugar—when Leila nudged me to say that Nilcea Freire, the minister of women for Brazil, appointed by President Lula da Silva, was standing next to us. She wanted to introduce me. “I'd love to!” I shouted over the loud drumming.

Send in the Twins ... and Chelsea, Too

An open letter to Sen. Hillary Clinton

Dear Hillary,

I've been meaning to write to you for some time. I see how you are currently the favorite among Democrats for the party's presidential nomination for 2008. You're already raising money around the country. But before you get to check what Laura Bush has changed while you've been out of the White House, if Gov. Bill Richardson gets an early Western presidential primary, you're going to have to face us lowly New Mexicans sooner rather than later.

So I thought I'd pop my big question now. Why should any Democrat support you as long as you continue to support Bush's war in Iraq?

Odds & Ends

Dateline: Canada—Mr. Floatie, a community activist who dresses in a gigantic feces-shaped costume, has withdrawn his name from the mayor's race in Victoria, British Columbia. James Skwarok, the man inside the costume, told reporters that the city has taken issue with his candidacy because only real people can run for municipal office. “Of course I'm not a real person,” Skwarok said last week. “I'm a big piece of poop.” Skwarok has been appearing in public as Mr. Floatie for some time now in an attempt to raise people's awareness about the pumping of raw sewage into the waters off British Columbia's capital. No word on what Mr. Floatie might do now that his political dreams have been dashed.

film

Reel World

Post-Tromatic Success Disorder—The 2nd annual TromaDance New Mexico film festival (Oct. 21-23) seemed to bring out the crowds with an impressive lineup of five feature films and 40-plus shorts, all produced through the blood, sweat and tears of local filmmakers. When the dust settled, the Audience Choice Awards ended up going to Scott Phillips' twisted superhero parody “Scream, Science Bastard, Scream” in the short category and to Richard Griffin's hillbilly monster movie Seepage in the feature category. The Burning Paradise Independent Spirit Award went to Heidi Griffin's documentary “The Subject to Change,” while the “El Quemado” Grand Prize went to Cyndi Trissel's horror parody “Phone Friends.” Congratulations to Burning Paradise, Troma Entertainment, the Guild Cinema and to all the filmmakers for their success.

Where the Truth Lies

Sexy showbiz mystery fails to convince

I'm just guessing here, but I would assume that filmmaker Atom Egoyan is a bit of an anomaly in Canada. Egyptian-born, Armenian-blooded, but raised in the chilly wilds of Western Canada, Egoyan has, for decades, been one of the premier agent provocateurs of the indie film biz. From the voyeuristic edge of his early work (Family Viewing, Speaking Parts) to the kinky kick of his middle-period films (The Adjuster, Exotica) to the mathematically precise heartbreak of his masterpiece (The Sweet Hereafter), Egoyan has created a body of work that excites and intrigues as many as it it offends. Among the clean cities, polite citizenry and universal healthcare of Canada, Egoyan and his sexually explicit excoriations of modern media and popular culture must seem--I don't know--a bit out of place, eh?

Chicken Little

Disney's computer-generated cartoon takes acorns and turns them into enjoyable, moderately sized saplings

It's sink or swim time for Disney. After enduring years of declining profits and management shake-ups—not to mention more stock market woes than Martha Stewart—the Mouse Corporation is releasing its first fully computer-generated feature cartoon made without the able assistance of Pixar. Having provided Disney with basically all of its unqualified successes in the last 10 years or so (Toy Story, Monsters Inc., The Incredibles), Pixar is now eager to dump the ungrateful Disney in favor of greener pastures and a bigger share of profits. Which leaves Disney in the unusual position of having to prove itself as an animation studio.

“Truthiness” Be Told

“The Colbert Report” on Comedy Central

Comedy Central has finally found a perfect companion to its hit series “The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” by commissioning a spin-off series for regular contributor Stephen Colbert. The show is styled after personality-driven talking-head TV commentators, pundits like Bill O'Reilly who don't report the news so much as parrot party-line opinions about the news so that like-minded individuals can feel good about themselves by agreeing wholeheartedly.

art

Culture Shock

What a Drag—Ooo! La! La! Look at all those pretty, pretty ladies. Sinatra-Devine Productions brings their annual Come Out drag queen spectacular to the National Hispanic Cultural Center (1701 Fourth Street SW) this Friday evening, Nov. 4. As in years past, Showgirls ... Out of Exile will pile on the glam in a show sure to entertain the pants right off you. Tickets are $15, $20 and $25. Show starts at 7 p.m. 724-4771.

Be a Man

Four Wheel Drive at the KiMo Theatre

Life was a lot simpler for men 30,000 years ago. Each morning we'd don our bearskin tunics, pick up our clubs and venture out of our caves in a leisurely search for an animal to beat to death for that evening's dinner. If our womenfolk didn't do what we wanted, of course, we'd grunt and pull their hair until they behaved.

Pajama Men

Tricklock Performance Space

It's happy fun sleepy time! The Pajama Men, Mark Chavez and Shenoah Allen, are back in town following a monster tour in which they sold out stadiums from Bangkok to Gary, Indiana. They loved them in Moscow. They loved them in St. Louis. Jump on the bandwagon and come see their latest work of deranged comic brilliance, Stop Not Going. The show, in which the boys play dozens of different characters in the span of roughly 60 minutes, runs Fridays and Saturdays at 8 p.m. through Nov. 12 at the Tricklock Performance Space. They will make you laugh until you weep; it's their special gift from God. $15 general, $12 students/seniors. The boys will also be doing a Dirty Thursday improv show on Nov. 10 at 9 p.m. that I'm told involves free condoms and a lot of cheap jokes at the expense of yo' mama. This show is a bargain at $8. For more information, call 254-8393.