Q: Dear Chef Boy Ari,
I have a dilemma. I want pineapple, and I’m already sweating the fact the fruit I want needs to be shipped from far away, releasing greenhouse gases into the environment and contributing to global warming.
Still, I want my pineapple bad enough to buy it anyway. So here’s my question: should I buy my sinful pineapple from a can, or fresh?
—Pining for Pineapple
A: Dear Pining,
That’s a really good question, and bravo for pondering it despite resolutely caving in to your abusive desires.
Killer Press Kit—He got everything right. From the handguns to the black T-shirt to the vest to the black, backward baseball cap. He posed. He spoke in short sentences--perfect for sound bites and pull quotes. Cho Seung-Hui made a press kit, a video and nearly 50 head shots and sent it off to NBC. It was accurate. He knew what a killer is supposed to look like, and he crafted his image carefully to match.
At the April 16 meeting, councilors debated various issues but postponed votes. Two land use appeals opposed the Development Review Board's (DRB) approval of a subdivision plat near the Embudito trailhead. The DRB ruling allows construction on individual lots to exceed the sector plan's requirements regarding density and slope as long as averages for the entire area meet guidelines. Councilors will hear the appeals in May.
Kurt Vonnegut Went Up to Heaven--I went to see the writer at Popejoy Hall a few years back and he asked those of us in the audience to point at the sky and say those words when he died.
Dateline: Japan--Talk about a hot seat! Japan’s leading toilet manufacturer is recalling some 180,000 bidets because they have a tendency to burst into flames. Toto Ltd. is offering free repairs on the Z series electric bidet after wiring problems caused three separate toilets to catch fire between March 2006 and March 2007. According to company spokesperson Emi Tanaka, the high-tech toilet sent up smoke in 26 other incidents. “Fortunately, nobody was using the toilets when the fire broke out and there were no injuries,” Tanaka said. “The fire would have been just under your buttocks.” The popular Z series toilet features a pulsating massage spray, a power dryer, built-in-the-bowl deodorizing filter, a “Tornado Wash” flush and a lid that opens and closes automatically. The model, which retails for between $1,680 and $2,600, is not sold in the United States.
Youth Explosion—The 25 Color Collisions film and video festival will take place Saturday and Sunday, April 28 and 29, at the CCA Cinematheque in Santa Fe. Billed as the first “youth-produced youth festival in the country,” 25 Color Collisions will feature 25 films by artists 25 years of age and under. Described as “works from the macabre to the magnificent complimenting each other in one incredible weekend,” 25CC will expose the views and express the opinions of youth filmmakers from around the world. Films and videos will be screened in a variety of mixed categories, including documentaries, fiction, animation and experimental.
On Hos and Hip-hop—Last week in response to Oprah's two-part Hip-hop Town Hall (which was in response to Don Imus being a dipshit), poet and hip-hop artist Saul Williams wrote an open letter to Oprah. Oprah's programs dealt with misogyny, racism, marginalization and censorship and hosted guests such as Def Jam cofounder Russell Simmons, rapper Common, poet and author Maya Angelou, a record executive, an entertainment lawyer, people involved with the NAACP and a group of female students from Spelman College (who, in 2004, protested a Nelly performance for his treatment of women in his videos). While the program was positive, it wasn't in-depth. Saul Williams’ letter, on the other hand, was.
Poetry Weekend—How much poetry can you cram into a single weekend? Well, you won't know till you give it your best effort, will you? April is National Poetry Month, and Albuquerque aims to end the month of prime versifying with a final blaze of glory.