It's Wednesday, July 23

and a teenager says he looked into the mirror after beating two homeless men to death and "saw the devil,"

APD cornered a fugitive and shot at him for the second time in six months. This time, they killed him.

A boy exploring an abandoned house in Ohio discovered a mummified corpse hanging in the closet.

Archaeologists have found the remains of a huge, 7-foot-long dog buried near the site where a demonic hound was said to have murdered church-goers in the 16th century.

A mysterious, yawning crater has opened up in the Yarnal region of Siberia and nobody knows why. Please note that "Yarnal" translates to "End of the world."

And some women are rejecting feminism because they need help opening jars.

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• Speaking Truth to Power: The problem with making your voice heard at City Hall by Samantha Anne Carrillo (6/12/2014)
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courtesy of the artist

A healthy, if not entirely sanitary, marriage

When beginning a career in comedy the question most often asked is, “How do you write a joke?” It varies of course. There are comics who tell stories, there are comics who use one-liners, and then there are comics who are more abstract. But jokes, no matter what form, usually consist of a premise and a punchline. For Teresa and Doug Wyckoff of The He & She Show, the premise is the two of them and the punchline is marriage. The Wyckoffs will be performing their new show at The Cell (700 First Street NW) on Friday, July 25.

“We were dating, as comedians, in Maui, and we found that over time a lot of our jokes were about each other, our relationship and relationships in general,” says Teresa. “So we decided to combine our comedic superish powers and do a relationship-themed show.” The Wyckoffs got hitched recently, and so their new show explores the shift between dating and marriage. During the show they solicit marriage advice from the audience. Thus, part of the show is stand-up and the other half is improv.

“We take marriage advice from the audience. It's interesting, because every city ends up having their own 'theme' of common streams of marriage advice. Sometimes one town is naughtier than another,” says Teresa. Some advice is crazy, some is incredibly dirty, and some is just a desperate question on how to make it all work. They never know what they’ll get and that’s part of the fun of it, but “even the worst advice can be funny and we reserve the right to make fun of any advice we receive,” says Teresa.

Having only been married for a year, the Wyckoffs are calling this their Newlywed Tour. The tour marks a huge change in their lives—marriage and moving from one coast to the other. Originally from Oregon, “We [sold] all our belongings—well, what doesn't fit into a small Toyota—and got rid of our house and most of our trappings. After we hit all 50 states we will then move to NYC to pursue comedy there,” says Teresa.

But besides delving into their life changes the Wyckoffs have nobler goals. “If [the audience] relates to our struggles in marriage and relationships, and sees us laugh at those issues,” says Teresa, “maybe that can help them laugh at theirs also and realize we're all in this together.” Local comedian, husband and father to three children, Eddie Stephens, will join the Wyckoffs as they joke about the difficulties and joys of marriage. As we all know, relationships are hard. Like anything in life that’s worth it, relationships take a lot of effort and sometimes they become tense but, as Teresa says, “Laughter tends to suck all of the tension out of any situation.”

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Genevieve Mueller is a writer and comedian. She performs all over the country and runs two monthly shows in Albuquerque: Comedians Power Hour and the Bad Penguin Comedy Show at The Box. More at genevievemuellercomedy.com or on Twitter: @fromthefloorup.

View in Alibi calendar

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My brother-in-law and I are about to leave on a trip for which we will need two maps: one of Phoenix and and another of Bandelier. My neighbor M has them.

A new red jeep backs up into our driveway, proceeding to their house which is behind ours. They are leaving too. I need to get to the maps. I walk around back to their house. I see the maps are already in the back of their station wagon, but their house is gone now. It's just a low wire fence around some dirt.

I see M and L sitting on a bench outside the house next door. I step over the low fences and approach them. They are watching intently as an irrigation ditch is being filled with a lot of water. A guy in a gray suit is diving for bodies. He finds one and floats it to the surface.

Some Albuquerque teens made the national news.

A good old fashioned peeper is haunting one local family.

Don't step in that hole.

Bodies from the downed Malaysian airplane are on their way to Holland.

You may never eat McDonald's again.

Puking in a cab in Calgary will cost you.

There is an inquiry into Litvenenko's poisoning.

Celebrity diet still lifes.

Bob Log is here.

Professional troll sues detractors.

Bob Log III

AM: So this is your big summer tour, eh?

BLIII: I get to come back home to America at least once a year, and I love it. I have a blast. I’ll play anywhere there’s a room full of people drinking beer, and that’s pretty much a lot of places.

AM: How’s it shaping up?

BLIII: This one’s pretty big, man. At one point, I’m going to be doing 37 shows in a row; it’s gonna get real interesting, but I’m also gonna get real good. I’ve been practicing 17 years for this show coming up in Albuquerque. But I keep it interesting. I change it up. I don’t do set lists. I just get up there and kinda see what happens.

Bob Log III

AM: Are you touring as a solo act this time around?

BLIII: It’s just me and the car. My plan is to kidnap people. I do have an opening band for the stretch from Nashville to New Hampshire.

AM: You’re playing that legendary Silvertone guitar for this tour, aren’t you?

BLIII: I am, but I also have some Airline guitars right now too. I get acoustic guitars and put a Silvertone pickup on them, and I put a piezo-accoustic pickup on them. There are two outs, so I get a distorted sound and an acoustic sound at the same time; that way I cover every frequency a guitar can possibly make.

AM: Don’t you also play the drums at the same time?

BLIII: When I play drums, I try to sound like a tight drummer and a drunk drummer at the same time. So time becomes like a rubber band, and I can move it or change it or shape it anyway I want. All day, time rules your day … but for an hour and a half each night I get to be the master of time. For the drunk drummer, I have a kick drum and a cymbal. For the tight drummer, I use a drum machine. My two drummers kinda hate each other. I get to finger-pick on top of the fighting.

AM: That sounds kinda tense.What do you think about that kind of tension in music?

BLIII: It's really a kind of release. The first time people started banging on rocks, it was some kind of celebration. The first music—people banging on the stuff around them—probably would have been really fucking fun. I’m trying to keep music fun. That’s my job. I don’t know anything else.

AM: Besides being fun to listen and party to, some have said your act is deeply transgressive. What are your thoughts on that?

BLIII: I’m a guitar player, and I've played since I was 11. I take that seriously, but I try to turn that into a party, a guitar party. I’m trying to get people to dance, and to dance wrong. If they drop a drink and the glass breaks, I’m doing my job. People can come on stage anytime and get crazy, and I encourage that. They come up and sit on me and I bounce them around while I play. I couldn’t actually do that in normal time, but when I play guitar I get energy I don’t normally have.

AM: What about the boob references: boobs as accompanying instruments or boob-stirred scotch?

BLIII: It’s about making fun of people who use boobs to try and sell you something. I’m saying boobs are ridiculous; let’s take out the sexy, the commercial power. Let’s do something folks would never do with their boobs. I dare anyone in the audience to do it and not smile. As for the song itself, instead of writing a song about what made my day bad, I wrote a song about what made my day good. That day, a woman saw me drinking, said give me that drink and just put her boob in it. I took a sip, and that made me feel fucking better.

AM: How does that work within your music?

BLIII: It’s the blues turned into a party. It’s like Little Richard, Chuck Berry and Bo Diddley. The songs aren’t about being sad anymore … Rock and roll came around, and then I decided to put on a funny suit and throw a party. It’s hilarious, and it’s the coolest guitar you’ve ever heard.

Bob Log III performs his one-of-a-kind take on the blues at Low Spirits (2823 Second Street NW) on Tuesday, July 22, at 9pm. Doors are at 8pm, and the cover is just 8 clams.

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