Nice Parking Job, Asshole!
There Are Assholes In Texas Edition
I was in Texas for a wedding this weekend. Found this one at the rehearsal dinner.
I'm sure you see plenty of asshole parking jobs, take a picture and email me.
Unlike the men's tournament—where we have, perhaps, the most unlikely Final Four of all time—the women's tournament has all the regal airs of a coronation. Will the University of Connecticut continue their otherworldly dominance? Will they meet up with Stanford—a team that many have claimed is actually the best in the country even as UConn was winning a record amount of games? Or will the (semi-)underdogs have a chance? Notre Dame's Fighting Irish took out the Tennessee Volunteers on Monday night ending Pat Summitt's revenge-quest on Geno and his UConn Huskies. The Fighting Irish are ranked as a No. 2 seed so it's not like people were taking them for granted. But, usually, when the path goes through Tennessee, that's where the path ends. Finally, on Tuesday night the second-seeded Texas A&M Aggies dismantled the Baylor Bears. Brittney Griner is one of the most exciting players in women's basketball—if only for pure spectacle—but she and her team were completely destroyed by A&M.
With all the fuss on Stanford and UConn's potential rematch —you might recall that they've played once this season already—there's a lot missing from the conversation about the contenders that will vie to keep them from that game.
On the one hand, Notre Dame enters their matchup with UConn with some nice momentum. UConn cruised past Duke, where the Fighting Irish had to scrap to get past the specter of Tennessee. (Notre Dame entered the game against the Vols with a lifetime record of 0-20 against Tennessee.) Also, there's a pesky knee injury that might be troubling Maya Moore.
On the other hand, Texas A&M seems ready and willing to take the fight to anyone. As they demonstrated against 6' 8" Brittney Griner, they're not in the NCAA Tournament bowing to any team, and that includes Stanford. Stanford roughed up the highest-scoring team in the nation in their Elite Eight matchup with Gonzaga— holding them to only 60 points in a game where the Lady Zags scored 38 in the first half.
The Final Four games begin on Sunday. Texas A&M will try to play the spoiler for Stanford at 5 p.m. MST on ESPN and then Notre Dame will attempt to deny Geno Auriemma's ladies their chance at the title game. Two teams will be vanquished and it's likely the No. 1 seed titans will play each other on Tuesday night for all the marbles. That game promises to be one of the best seen in a long, long time—as long as neither of those pesky 2 seeds decide they have something to say about it.
The Daily Word With Angry Birds Movie Trailers, Heart-Charged iPods, Etch A Sketch Art
Texas is thinking about legalizing gambling to make up for their own budget deficit. Yee haw?
Welfare recipients in NYC may soon be forced to scrub subways to get their check.
Your iPod may soon be able to be charged by a beating heart.
This man completely lost it when he failed to steal a muffin fromthe Copper Canyon Cafe on Gibson.
An explosive device was found in an old refrigerator near Wyoming and Osuna.
If you’re in the market for your very own aircraft carrier, now’s your chance!
All those bastardized online abbreviations you’ve come to love (or hate) make the dictionary.
Take a look at this sweet gallery of amazing Etch A Sketch art.
Richard Simmons stars in this really creepy airline safety video for Air New Zealand.
This Ohio man gets a cable bill in the mail for a cool $16 million.
Watch this hilarious “real life” movie trailer for Angry Birds.
The Daily Word 3.26.11: No confidence vote for Stephen Harper; marionettes; The Beardpick Challenge; TMZ style Gandhi revelation
Geraldine Ferraro is dead.
Elizabeth Taylor lives on in pictures.
Bill Maher has found the perfect anti-Obama GOP presidential candidate and his name is Karab Amabo.
The FBI still doesn't know who was behind the anthrax-letters in 2001.
Police in Texas took a woman into custody for driving without a license. The cops left her two year old kid behind in the car.
Brett Michaels claims his stroke was caused by a Spinal Tap styled stage mishap. AND he's suing over it. W/ video!
"Where there's smoke, there's fried chicken." Latest Rio Grande Sun Police Blotter.
Get a %25 discount at a Santa Fe smoke shop if your pic... uh, mugshot, appears in the "Jailbyrd" free newspaper.
On this day in 1885, the Second Louis Riel Rebellion began at Duck Lake in Saskatchewan, Canada.
The Daily Word featuring Twitter growing up, Libya going crazy, South Park creators getting Mormon
A New York Times photographer was taken hostage and sexually assaulted in Libya. She took some incredible photos.
Already, this ridiculous Libyan faux-conflict is already costing several billion dollars.
This man brought an open can of beer to his DWI court appearance.
The Quran is found “guilty,” burned in a Florida church.
Get ready for Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s Broadway musical “The Book of Mormon.”
People are signing an online petition to have Apple remove a “gay cure” app.
This Albuquerque man went in to cardiac arrest and later died after being tased by police.
So that’s where my WWII-era machine gun went...
This man was so pissed off that Taco Bell burritos went up in price, he started firing at police. They’re not real anyway, dude.
Stand by Me? These kids in Texas find a human skull while fishing.
OMG, it’s Twitter’s fifth birthday!
...And this N.C. historian is telling the story of the Civil War through Twitter.
The Daily Word: Sex Toy Defusing, Japan in Even Worse Shape, Soy Sauce Hazing
Radiation levels are increasing in Japan after explosions continue to rock nuclear power plants.
... And with that, Japan’s tsunami and earthquake disaster is more costly than Hurricane Katrina.
This soy sauce fraternity hazing could have been responsible for a seizure.
Yee-haw! Texans are fighting to bring back the Alamo battle flag.
A Russian bomb squad was called to defuse a sex toy.
Al Franken thinks big corporations are trying to take down the Internet.
Libyan rebels want the west to take out Gaddafi.
If you have to tweet your anxiety attack, are you really having an anxiety attack?
Sorry, there will be no Harry Baals building in Fort Wayne.
This man used a samurai sword to rob a pharmacy.
The Daily Word 3.12.11: Japanese exploding reactor; experts agree Gaddafi can't win in the long-term due to probable Central America-in-the-80's-tinged military support of rebels; Iron Maiden birthday
Newt Gingrich says he cheated on his wife because he was working too hard for America.
Intellectual property law and American world hegemony.
Super cool Australian mugshots from the early 1920's.
Amnesty International is on Robert Gates' ass over Wikileaker Bradley Manning's living conditions/torture which involves "forced prolonged nudity."
A Texas state representative has introduced a bill making non-medically necessary abortion illegal.
Daylight Saving Time, not Daylight Savings Time. Reminder.
South by Southwest. The meat market badge.
On this day in 1957, Steve Harris, Bassist and chief songwriter for Iron Maiden was born.
The Daily Word: NPR CEO Resigns, Ron Bell DWI Conviction, California Fish Kill
Gov. Pat Quinn is set to sign legislation to abolish death penalty in Illinois.
Fire destroys 13 homes in Silver City.
Gang rape of 11-year-old girl in Texas leads to the arrest of 18 men and teenagers.
Pennsylvania farmhouse fire kills seven children.
Ron Bell found guilty on DWI charges.
Drivers illegally detained for using large bills on toll roads.
Utah lawmakers passed a bill forcing public school teachers to teach that the United States is a republic, not a democracy, because "Democracy" sort of has the word "Democrat" in it.
Victim's father vows to murder child killer if he gets out of prison.
Top ten things Newt Gingrich doesn't want you to know about Newt Gingrich.
Millions of dead anchovies clog shoreline in Redondo Beach.
Mexican police chief seeks US asylum.
A history of our attempts at communication with aliens.
Teacher quits after students discover her porny past.
Leave it to monkeys to invent a new fishing technique.
Al Jazeera announces plans to launch English language children's channel that you will never get to watch because your cable company won't carry it.
Michael Chabon is creating a show for HBO about magicians who fight Nazis!
Check out McDonald's
Because sometimes an ear of corn is not an ear of corn, or how to interpret your food dreams.
Angry Burger King customer
Have you tried Sonic's new hot dogs?
Watch every Power Ranger ever battle at the same time!
I wish there was something nerdier I could read to my kids instead of Goodnight Moon.
Here's a nice gallery of 1970s Japanese sci-fi art.
RIP Mike Starr, original bassist for Alice In Chains.
Watch the pilot to the Clarissa Explains It All sequel that never made it to air.
The Daily Word: Mardi Gras, Charlie Sheen is Crazy, Texas is Crazier
Batshit crazy Charlie Sheen is officially fired from “Two and Half Men” and vows lawsuit. Winning.
...Even Gary Busey of all people is praying for the poor guy.
Today is Mardi Gras! Here’s what you should eat and drink during the festivities.
Why would you adopt a son if you’re just going to keep him in a dog crate all day?
A woman was found to be hiding $170,000 in her underwear at JFK Airport.
I wish Tom Brady would stop screwing with his hair and start learning to win a playoff game.
Don’t steal severed feet from accident scenes to make into dog toys.
Silver City is burning. Badly.
Texas lawmakers approve a bill mandating an ultrasound before an abortion.
Calm down, everyone; ridiculously popular game Angry Birds is coming to Facebook.
Close to 500 people showed up at the Roundhouse last night for a pro-immigrant vigil.
God of the Geeks George Lucas is taking a prop designer to court for selling stormtrooper helmets.
Is “LOL” slowly being phased out?? OMG!
The Daily Word 02.16.11: Missing Giant Cactus, Burning Hot Nacho Cheese
American ICE agent killed in Mexico.
A giant fiberglass cactus stolen from an Albuquerque park is probably in some jackass' dorm room.
Texas refuses to compensate man wrongly imprisoned on death row for 18 years.
South Dakota proposes law that could legalize the killing of abortion providers.
CBS News reporter Lara Logan was sexually assaulted during the Egypt protests.
Looks like the Patriot Act may be extended after all.
Rep. Antonio "Moe" Maestas, proposes to ease penalties for selling alcohol to minors.
A Scottish deerhound named Foxcliffe Hickory Wind wins the Westminster Dog Show.
What happens to all those incorrect "Pittsburgh Steelers Super Bowl Champion" tshirts?
Disney sued for severe burns resulting from hot nacho cheese.
Birthers make up a majority of the GOP.
The Rock will be hosting this year's Wrestlemania.
Why does everyone get so bent out of shape when a new version of Monopoly is released?
David Letterman tricked by Lindsay Lohan's fake friend.
More on what Fox News called the worst video game in the world.
Let's visit the remote town in Romania is specializing in cybercrime.
Online appliance retailer makes customers sign agreement threatening felony libel lawsuits for negative reviews.
If you were in Haley Barbour's fat shoes would you denounce the KKK?
Albuquerque firefighters want to FMB.
Sweet gallery of Japanese graphic design from the 20s and 30s.
I finally saw an armadillo that was not dead
One day in Texas
I was driving in a remote and beautiful stretch of the Texas panhandle one day when I saw a pile of what was once a raccoon. No big deal. There is a ton of road kill on this portion of nowhere in between Memphis, Texas and Hollis, Okla.
But there was a gray thing standing by the raccoon and I knew at once it was an armadillo. I had never seen one, not alive, always dead like the poor coon. This one might have been dead as well. A raccoon and armadillo might have murdered each other, and there mortal combat locked in time would make a good photo opportunity.
In either case it seemed like a u-turn was totally worth it.
The armadillo was not dead and was feasting enthusiastically. It was shoulder deep inside what remained of the raccoon. It didn't stop for me, not until I was within 10 feet of the beast. It was ancient, primordial. It stopped eating, took a step back and eyed me but did not run off. I shot some more photos but left before the thing ran into the street--and the horrible fate that befell the coon.
The Daily Word 12.31.10: 2010 is finally over.
No pardon for Billy the Kid.
Uncle shoots nephew while playing 'cops and robbers' with real gun.
Man hurt playing real 'Frogger.'
Man shot by police had PTSD.
Former President of Israel convicted of rape.
Top Ten Books of 2010.
Tornado kills three in Arkansas.
Flood in Australia the size of Texas.
Stars who died in 2010.
Man strips at Virginia airport.
Restaurant critic gets exposed by restaurant owner.
The Daily Word 7.6.10: Queen Elizabeth, Prince, More Tar Balls
Tar balls are discovered in Texas, meaning that oil has successfully infiltrated all five gulf states. Fuck you, BP!
The Artist Still Known As Prince says the Internet is dead.
The “grand finale” during the fireworks display goes horribly wrong in Palmyra, PA as eleven people are hurt.
Queen Elizabeth to visit New York City for the first time since 1976.
The Feds file a lawsuit today against Arizona’s SB 1070.
Charles Manson follower Leslie “Lulu” Van Houten is up for parole.
Stamps may go up by a 2-cent increase to 46 cents next year.
Michael Astorga appeals his conviction for the murder of Bernalillo County deputy James McGrane in 2006.
A fire broke out at the Mountain Run shopping center early this morning.
Hot summer: temperatures could reach 102 degrees as the east coast gets slammed with a massive heat wave.
A topless woman in Albuquerque slams into a gas line with her car.
Could You At Least Buy Me Dinner First?
(AP Photo/Jack Plunkett)
I think it was when the Wal-Mart manager said, “I just can’t help you, because I have no idea how that works”, and then walked away from me, that I really started to get ticked off. Bad customer service has been the theme for several of my blogs. I am pretty good at turning the other cheek, picking my battles and so on when it comes to a horrifying experience with a corporate giant. Westley Trellis, well, not so much. Trellis took a baseball bat and smashed to bits twenty-nine flat screen televisions, causing over $22,000 in damages in a Wal-mart electronics department. One commentator opined that perhaps Trellis was “simply slashing prices?”
Another time I wanted to lash out at corporate America, government agencies, was the Summer I was, well, nabbed for not being “entirely” forthcoming on some tax information. I had “forgotten” to report something, and well, I got in trouble with the IRS. They sent letters, of course I didn’t respond to them, and eventually received a default judgment and was ordered to pay some money back to the IRS. Well, I didn’t, and so they garnished wages from me that fall. I basically worked at this job I had for free in order to pay back my debt. I wanted to get angry, and I wanted to tell them off, ask them if they would consider dinner first before just jamming their you know what in my you know where, but I didn’t.
Joe Stack had a different approach to his IRS experience. He took his Piper Cherokee airplane and flew it right into the Echelon Building in Austin, TX. An online article tears Stack apart, calling him a man “with a serious grudge”, and “left a lot of innocent people in his wake”. Well I don’t know if I would put IRS and innocent in the same sentence, and while I am saddened for the injured parties, I share some empathy for Stack’s ordeal. Eventually people succumb to the rage in their heads when they are not listened to, or treated badly, and they end up doing things like Trellis, and Stack did. Wal-mart and the IRS may consider taking some responsibility themselves instead of writing off Stack, a software engineer and musician, who was handled badly, ignored, and stuck in a Web of poorly handled consumer relationships by corporations and government agencies. Stack has a 6-page, 3000 word manifesto online that you can draw your own conclusions from.
How do we communicate to these corporate bears, and government gorillas in a way that gets our point across without crashing planes, and busting up televisions? Is it possible? There are many ways to handle bad service, and avoid the caveat emptor mind-set; I don’t know if one is better than another. I have managed to avoid suicidal tendencies from bad service, and batting practice in the Wal-mart electronics department, but there are times when I cheer silently for the ones that make such grand gestures. I don’t think they actually believe their cries of injustice will be heard, but their actions will not be forgotten.
When are we going to demand that they put customer relationships at the front of the line again, and keep the “bottom line” from towing the whole ship down to the bottom of the ocean? Now we just have to find the middle line between bats, and planes; and the ability to make changes, and communicate just a little bit better with each other, perhaps even listen a little more. I have hope, even if while I write this, phone pressed desperately to my ear, my expected hold time is 32 minutes. Don’t worry I don’t even like baseball and flying makes me nauseous.