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V.20 No.27 |


The Daily Word where a dog bites Morrissey, Ron Paul Retires and there's Carmageddon in LA

The Daily Word

Republicans gave away the debt ceiling fight.

The House fails to pass the Bulb Act.

Americans are having fewer children.

The Westboro Baptist Church chickens out of protesting Betty Ford's funeral.

Bronze letters stolen from buildings in Belen.

Recall elections begin in Wisconsin.

OUTRAGE after Michelle Obama eats a hamburger.

Ron Paul is retiring from Congress to focus on losing his presidential election.

Why the dollar store is a ripoff.

Bring your protractors to Pittsburgh.

The National League wins the All-Star Game.

Some dog hates Morrissey almost as much as I do.

L.A. is preparing for Carmageddon.

I've been a Netflix member since 2000, and in that time they've never raised my rates, but what the hell Netflix?

Greatest headline ever.

RIP Sherwood Schwartz.

Best ever cover of They Might Be Giants' Istanbul (Not Constantinople).

The last know surviving dinosaur was the triceratops.

What is a derecho?

Front row on world's steepest roller coaster.

Five million 4chan posts visualized.

Richard Simmons discovers planking, but when will he master flanking?

Happy Birthday Bob Crane!!!

V.20 No.22 |


The Daily Word: Alec Baldwin for Mayor, Upgrade Your iPhone Today, Mass-Grave In Texas

The Daily Word

Wallow Fire is creeping towards the NM state line.

Connecticut became the 13th state to decriminalize marijuana.

Two dogs die after being left in hot Animal Welfare vehicle.

Conservative activist group puts fake eviction notices on Detroit homeowners' doors.

Margaret Thatcher won't meet with Sarah Palin.

The owner of Steins Ghost Town was found shot to death.

The Texas mass-grave that wasn't.

Speaker of the House John Boehner more than doubled his monthly expense account.

Long list of sports figures who claimed their Twitter was hacked.

E. Coli infections in Tennessee.

New deep space images from the VLT Survey Telescope.

Alec Baldwin is considering running for mayor of New York City.

How to upgrade your iPhone to iOS 5 today!

Australia's Department of Defense claims to have lost all of it's UFO files.

One out of four US hackers is a FBI informant.

Good news for the 23,322 bittorrenters accused of sharing The Expendables.

The most kissed girl in the world.

Why aren't airplane seats designed better?

Peanutweeter is the new Garfield Minus Garfield.

10 video game facts about the late Macho Man Randy Savage.

Happy birthday Joan Rivers!!!

V.20 No.18 |


The Daily Word: Enhanced Pat Downs, Neo-Nazis, Burger of the Future

The Daily Word

APS releases next year's budget, plans on cutting more than 400 jobs.

The man killed by APD yesterday was armed with a plastic kitchen spoon.

President Obama still enjoying the post-bin Laden assassination popularity boost.

Eight-month-old gets an enhanced pat-down at Kansas City airport.

Donald Trump doesn't know what the 13 stripes represent on the American flag.

Interesting visualization of the spread of Osama bin Laden death news thru twitter.

Ten-year-old kills his neo-nazi father.

Because sometimes it's better when your favorite TV show gets cancelled.

History of people who use the internet to convince others to commit suicide.

The truth about Groupon.

Let your kids eat some junk food already!

Man found living on roof of a Georgia Waffle House.

Read all about the Old Man of the Lake.

The most hipster state in the US is …

Are you fat enough for the new Triple Double Oreo?

Bristol Palin had surgery that gave her a new chin, but don't worry, it was for medical reasons.

Saddest mugshot ever.

Social networking cigarettes.

Slow motion video of some dudes playing with a six foot water balloon.

Equisetum is the oldest genus of land plant, over 100 million years old.

Soul Caliber 5 is coming next year.

The validity of the legal advice from Jay-Z's 99 Problems.

New retro-cartoon channel to launch 'soon.'

The burger of the future.

Who watches the Watchponies?

Happy Birthday Jeffrey Donovan!!!

V.20 No.12 | 3/24/2011


The Daily Word featuring Twitter growing up, Libya going crazy, South Park creators getting Mormon

The Daily Word

A New York Times photographer was taken hostage and sexually assaulted in Libya. She took some incredible photos.

Already, this ridiculous Libyan faux-conflict is already costing several billion dollars.

This man brought an open can of beer to his DWI court appearance.

The Quran is found “guilty,” burned in a Florida church.

Get ready for Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s Broadway musical “The Book of Mormon.”

People are signing an online petition to have Apple remove a “gay cure” app.

This Albuquerque man went in to cardiac arrest and later died after being tased by police.

So that’s where my WWII-era machine gun went...

This man was so pissed off that Taco Bell burritos went up in price, he started firing at police. They’re not real anyway, dude.

Stand by Me? These kids in Texas find a human skull while fishing.

OMG, it’s Twitter’s fifth birthday!

...And this N.C. historian is telling the story of the Civil War through Twitter.

V.20 No.10 |


The Daily Word: Japan, Politics, Politics, Politics, Hitler, Politics, Boob Jobs, Politics

The Daily Word

Bill O'Reilly says the media is hyping the the nuclear situation in Japan, meanwhile Japanese workers evacuate the troubled nuclear plant. In an unrelated matter, it's being reported that radioactive snow is falling in Japan.

Not a single Republican on the House Energy committee will admit that climate change is real.

N.M. House rejects the Senate's immigrant license bill.

New census data shows Rio Rancho and Los Lunas are New Mexico's fastest growing cities.

Democrats are trying to force Republicans who oppose Obama's health care overhual to publicly declare whether they accept taxpayer-subsidized health care from the Federal Employee Health Benefit Program.

Missouri lawmakers are repealing voter-approved anti-puppy-mill lows.

House committee has nothing better to do than vote to defund NPR and PBS.

Is this what conservatives really want? Georgia governor raises taxes on Girl Scout Cookies, and cuts taxes on multinational corporations. While Michigan's governor cuts corporate tax rate by 86% and raises taxes for the working poor.

A terrible mother filed a lawsuit against her daughter's preschool for inadequately preparing the 4-year-old to pursue an Ivy League education.

Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez is urging his citizens to say no to boob jobs.

Chicago bookstore forced to cancel mafia book signing after threats.

Some of the best walk off moments from 60 Minutes.

Life publishes some never-before seen photos of Hitler.

A tour of the worlds greatest holes.

The Wire's Snoop arrested, charged with conspiracy to sell heroin.

TV's Buffy The Vampire Slayer premiered 14 years ago this week.

Lean Cuisine meals are being recalled.

Were you a Hee Haw fan or did your parents prefer Soul Train? You can only choose one!

Hey nerds! Read Stan Lee's deposition on the creation of the Marvel universe. Seriously, it's good.

The Gap want's you to haggle for your next pair of pants.

Nickelodeon is bringing back some it's big hits from the 90s. Come on Pete & Pete!

Charlie Sheen's porn star loser girlfriend tweets her suicide attempt.

R.I.P. Nate Dogg.

Stephen King is writing another Dark Tower book.

Happy birthday Jerry Lewis!


Fake Gov. Susana Martinez, real Gov. Susana Martinez

There are two pretend guvs on Twitter.

At least, the Alibi hopes they're pretend. Because no one should outlaw Don Schrader's booty shorts. Our official editorial policy is firmly in favor of those shorts. Anonymous sources confirm: The other apparel option is nekkidness.

Susana2014 aims to offer insight into Martinez' internal world.

SusanaLaTejana writes in haiku.

In actual news, real ex-Gov. Bill Richardson is pissed at real Gov. Martinez for being disrespectful to him.

There's also a fake CoachLocksley.

And a clearly labeled FakeAbqPolice.

Know of any other satirical Twitters?

V.20 No.6 |


The Daily Word 2.12.11: Worse than yogurt; sheep are smarter than you think; inject the venom

The Daily Word

Those in power across the middle east continue to try and buy their citizens off

Bath Salts mimic the effects of cocaine and LSD. Really?

Speaking of wild drugs, who hasn't wanted to try snake venom?

After the venom, why not finally do this?

Cool slide show on mass movement of rural male Chinese to cities. Anyone who can give me a synonym for rural that starts w/ an M gets a kudo.

Fake Rahm Emanuel is even better than fake Andy Rooney on Twitter. If you start a week ago the feed reads kind of like Into The Wild w/ interns and baked beans.

Sunflower Market founder Michael Gilliland busted on suspicion of soliciting a minor for prostitution. Jeez.

Illinois ponzi scheme.

NY Post probably had the best cover depicting Mubarek resignation.

Sheep are smarter than.... smarter than you thought, anyway.

"Flowers wilt. Chocolates melt. Roaches are forever."

On this day in 1950, Einstein warned against the hydrogen bomb.

V.20 No.3 |


Hangover Sports

Hard times for Lobos, Packers and Steelers in Super Bowl

Lobo Basketball

Since Mountain West Conference play has started, Lobo fans maybe wondering when it's time to hit the panic button. Perhaps the time is now, with New Mexico losing a heart breaker to UNLV 63-62 Saturday afternoon. New Mexico had the lead going into halftime but didn't put themselves in a position to win. The Lobos shot 25 percent from three point range and had 20 turnovers. Despite bad shooting and Lobo Alex Kirk scoring only two points with zero rebounds, New Mexico had a chance to send the game to overtime. UNM's Kendall Williams could have clenched it when he was fouled with 1.1 seconds left. Williams hit the first free throw but missed the second, giving UNLV the win. With four conference loses, the Lobos need someone to emerge a leader. UNM returns home for a two games against TCU and No. 9 BYU. If the Lobos don't win both these games, it's panic time.

NFL Playoffs

Aaron Rodgers lead the Packers to a 21-14 victory over the Chicago Bears to capture the NFC championship. Rodgers wasn't perfect, throwing two interceptions but added a rushing touchdown and always gave his team good field position. The Packers defense was hard hitting and nasty, knocking Bears Quarterback Jay Cutler out of the game. Players around the league were questioning Cutler's injury on Twitter by calling him a sissy and a quitter. Cutler is a lot of things but a quitter is not one of them. Cutler sitting out was the right decision and hopefully he can bounce back from his knee injury. The Packers had multiple chances to bury the Bears but kept the game close. Green Bay will have to clean up the mistakes and play more consistent in order to become victorious on Super Bowl Sunday.

The New York Jets must have decided not play to the first half of the AFC championship game. Pittsburgh had a 24-3 lead and loads of momentum pushing the Jets into a hole. New York's Mark Sanchez had two touchdown passes in the second half but it was too late. Pittsburgh held on 24-19 and clearly must be considered a league powerhouse. Steelers Head Coach Mike Tomlin is an elite football mind.

Super Bowl XLV features two battle tested teams and should be a game to remember.

V.19 No.50 | 12/16/2010


Anti-Social is relief for the social media-addicted

Do you have a computery job from which you take breaks throughout the day to check in on Facebook or the Twitter? A software developer has created an application for Mac users that helps quell the urge to engage in the time-wasting habits related to social media. When activated, Anti-Social makes it impossible to log on to certain sites—as dictated by the user—unless you reboot your computer. Read about it, or listen to NPR’s story here.

V.19 No.38 | 9/23/2010


Why we hate sports celebrities

Covering sports is getting to be harder day by day. There's the usual suspects (NBA players arrested on suspicion of domestic abuse and previously untouchably clean superstars turning out to be kinda-sorta scumbags), and then there's a little bit more.

Reggie Bush just became the first Heisman Trophy winner in history to give the trophy back. This will not put an end to the cloud of scandal surrounding the University of Southern California. Nor is that cloud limited to the football program and now-departed (but not fired, he just got a job in the NFL) head football coach, Pete Carroll. The USC basketball program, meanwhile, is dogged by accusations that its star around the same time, O.J. Mayo, who now plays in the NBA, engaged in essentially the exact same behavior.

To anyone who thinks the current trouble is SoCal-centered, look no further than Tennessee coach Bruce Pearl and the suspicion that is refusing to leave his side. In the pros, the recent NBA newsscape has been dominated by the fact that LeBron James' Q Score has fallen—drastically.

But is this really new? Are these things that didn't happen before? Are we living in some kind of deadly dark era, where athletes are misbehaving at a never-before-seen level? Is there something wrong with our generation?

Or, is it simply a reflection of the sped-up era in which we live? There have been numerous suggestions that the 24-hour cable news cycle makes it appear as though we live in a more violent world than is actually the case. With athletes hopping onto social networks like Twitter we get an unfiltered look at them and their lives. Few people will dispute that this is an interesting and probably positive wrinkle to the fan-entertainer relationship.

However, there is always a price to pay for closeness. (Remember the phrase about meeting your heroes?) With the media going full-tilt around the clock and the specialization of news organizations, we get revelations that we might not have in the past. Shaq's Twitter account is funny, but it's kind of sad to read about him stealing ideas for TV shows from teammates.

All this is merely to say: It's a shame about Reggie Bush. It's a shame that he essentially had to give back one of the most prestigious awards in the sport. It's a shame that there were suspicions about his time at USC since he was there. But the biggest shame of all is that the defending Super Bowl champs—the New Orleans Saints—are tainted, even if it's ever so slightly, by yet another negative news story about a sports star.

What's the solution? We refuse to live in blissful ignorance, and that's a good thing. But it feels like it keeps getting a little harder to watch sports, root for the same old kind of star, and read the same kind of story when they inevitably slip up.

V.19 No.36 |


The Daily Word 09.15.10: Twitter, Teabaggers, Tommy Lee Jones

The Daily Word

Big wins for Teabaggers last night. But do they have any chance in the general election?

The Senate will vote on repealing Don't Ask Don't Tell.

Students in Roswell are suspended for bringing doughnuts to school.

Caught on tape: suspect escapes from moving police car.

Someone (besides Jon Stewart) finally calls out Sean Hannity.

This guy is still hating on Obama, FROM BEYOND THE GRAAAAVE!

Miami hospital circumcises baby by mistake, I wonder if they're getting sued?

New research shows the ancient Greeks were the first to document a Halley's Comet sighting.

Are you paying too much for weed?

How does Twitter's redesign affect you?

Taco Bell now has flatbread sandwiches.

Why are there so many unfunny people on the new Forbes list of the top-earning comedians.

NASA was to blame for the weird atmospheric symbols over Houston on 9/11. OR WERE THEY???

The ten creepiest fast food mascots are …

How to suck less at Halo: Reach.

Al Sharpton is getting a new Sunday morning talk show.

Weren't you just asking for a list of the 10 coolest G.I. Joe ninjas?

So long Liberace Museum.

Only a jackass would buy this $178 cheese sandwich.

It's Tommy Lee Jones' birthday!

V.19 No.35 |


The Daily Word 9.3.2010: No sex for China, scamming the system, the voting habits of young people

The Daily Word

Funds for flicks in New Mexico.

Kitties aren't supposed to live in walls.

Been scamming unemployment? Watch out.

A dude with crazy hair was arrested after his ex-gf's body was found yesterday.

Gypsy Fest! Damn, it's in Serbia.

Oh how Twitter grew.

Abstinence education works so well it's being imported to China. They're gonna love it.

Young'uns won't even pick a political party.

Oh NIKE? Why must thee be so dickish?

This Mr. Potato Head rules!

V.19 No.30 | 7/29/2010


The Daily Word 8.16.10: Craigslist Killer, Katie Holmes’ weird marriage, North Korea on Twitter.

The Daily Word

The accused Craigslist killer escaped to hell.

Deathrace 2010.

“He was like, ‘ Where’s my food at?’”

World economy: a three way tie for last.

Obama defends the ground zero mosque, and presumably the gay bar to open next door to it.

Katie Holmes says marriage can feel weird. Katie, some marriages are weird.

Dinosaurs found alive in Papua New Guinea and elsewhere?

Little Feat drummer Ritchie Hayward died. Little Feat celebrated with a big concert to show they didn’t need him.

Be sure to follow North Korea on Twitter.

Hillary Duff married a hockey player and I can’t even think of a good joke about it.

Let he who has not sinned… I guess that means the Taliban.

Porn viruses infected a state laptop.

Another bear was caught in the Heights.

The Stabbing Burglar strikes.

It’s Robert Culp’s birthday!


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V.19 No.26 |


Collective Shared Experiences (aka Sports)

Many moons ago, just after graduating from college, I lived, for a short time, in a little Ohio town called Akron. When I moved there, all anyone knew was that it had once been the rubber capital of the U.S. and there was a high school kid there who just might be the best basketball player since Michael Jordan.

By the time I left northeastern Ohio that seemingly sweet kid, who I often saw eating alone at local restaurants, was in the national spotlight, the subject of an endorsement bidding deal that was rumored to be worth about $92 million. He was also probably the only person in Akron with a Hummer.

Today that kid is an adult and has, as of right this second, 112,267 people following his Twitter account, waiting to find out where he'll play.

Stop, refresh, 112,544...112,722...

Thus far, all he's said, about an hour ago is, "Hello World, the Real King James is in the Building "Finally". My Brother @oneandonlycp3 gas'd me up to jump on board so I'm here. Haaaa"


Wow. If you're LeBron James you don't really have to say a word and everyone will wait with bated breath!

Back in Ohio, during that bidding war, one athletic company, which definitely didn't have the cash to compete put up billboards and ads on busses, only in Akron that were targeted solely to James. They said "What will you do with your millions?" and "So you want to be a superstar?"

Clearly...114,172...superstar status arrived.

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