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 V.19 No.19 | May 13 - 19, 2010 
By the Skaters, for the Skaters

Derby News

By the Skaters, for the Skaters

Duke City Derby's skaters are at practice at the Heights Community Center a little early today. A photographer from ABQ Sports magazine is on hand to take photos, and even though he’s the one with the camera, it's the roller girls who direct the shoot. “We're all going to shake our faces,” a beskated player in the front row tells the photographer. “You'll have about a two-second window to take the picture.” Without further instruction, each skater madly shakes her head, and the photographer snaps away.

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Derby Wars

Whiplashes Roll in From Taos

Duke City Derby will open the 2010 season in yet another venue. The league has scheduled six matches in the Albuquerque Convention Center, starting with the season-opener on Saturday, May 15. Location isn't the only major change this seasonin a bid to make matches more competitive, players on the league's three Albuquerque-based teams (Derby Intelligence Agency, DoomsDames and Ho-Bots) have been shuffled. Plus, a new team, hailing from Taos, will jump into the fray.

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Meep Meep
Eric Williams ericwphoto.com

Derby Archive

A Retrospective of Roller Girls in Burque

I remember when derby hit the scene in the 505. Reporters covered it from many angles, but no one could seem to get a handle on whether this was hot chix with crazy socks on skates or a real sport. And maybe we’ve learned, finally, that it can be both.

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Betty Sprocket

Hail, Velocipede!

Eight Tacks for Trailside Tact

O, fair Albuquerque! While you were nestled all snug in your bed this winter, your Auntie Betty was out patrolling the trails on bikeback, coming home with perpetually chapped cheeks from the cold. Spring has since sprung, summer is nigh on high, and our city's Bosque and bikeways are teeming with life. It's a rich taxonomy: Cyclists can spy roadrunners and rattlesnakes and rollerblading trophy wives. Almost everyone is welcome in the benevolent eyes of Betty Sprocket, but there is one species that must be stamped out. A type of rider more pernicious than the salt cedar, more insidious than the Russian thistle. The most despicable cyclist of all: the bike punk.

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Odds & Ends

Dateline: OregonThe owner of a waste removal service settled a feud with a deadbeat customer by simply returning all the dog poop she had removed from the customer’s propertywith interest. According to a report on KTVZ, Melinda Hofmann, owner of The Bomb Squad dog waste pick-up service in Bend, tried to collect a long overdue $150 payment from Deborah Dillow last Monday night. When Dillow didn’t answer the door, Hofmann got an idea. “I started to go back and write another note,” Hoffman told reporters on Wednesday. “But I just decided to give her poop back.” Hofmann backed up her work vehicle and dumped the day’s haul30 gallons of fecesonto Dillow’s front yard. Hofmann said it wasn’t the most adult of decisions, but admitted, “As I was flinging the poo all over her yard, it felt really good, and I just kept doing it.” In fact, Hofmann didn’t stop “flinging the poo” until police arrived. “Very messy,” police Sgt. Dan Ritchie said. “I would imagine it probably took the homeowners quite some time to clean that mess up.” Hofmann was taken away in handcuffs and charged with criminal trespassing, criminal mischief and offensive littering. Dillow said she always intended to pay Hofmann, but is battling cancer and recently had to spend $700 on medication. Despite the outcome, Hofmann seemed unrepentant about her chosen course of action, telling KTVZ, “Do I have regrets for dumping poop back in her yard cause she’s a slacker client? Nope.”

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