Lisa Simpson would have theoretically gotten married yesterday
... if she were allowed to age. Move over, Chelsea Clinton.
This still is from an episode that aired in 1995.
But Lisa will remain 8 years old forever as best anyone can tell. Plus, maybe she’s really the kind of girl that doesn’t believe in marriage anyway.
Harvey Pekar, Creator of the American Splendor Comics, Has Died.
Harvey Pekar has died at age 70 of unknown causes. Pekar beautifully chronicled his mundane life in American Splendor comics. My favorite was the one where he and his buddies found a dead dolphin and strapped it to the top of their car. An award-winning movie of American Splendor was made in 2003. Pekar was one of David Letterman’s most successful hecklers. Rest in peace, scary little comic book man.
Chris Haney, Inventor of Trivial Pursuit, Died
“Thundercats” Writer Stephen Perry Has Been Murdered
Stephen Perry, missing for two weeks, has been pronounced the victim of homicide. Perry is best know for his work on the popular animated series, “Thundercats.” Rest in peace, Snarfman. Hang tough, Leo.
Lynn Redgrave Died.
Lynn Redgrave died at 67 today. She had been battling breast cancer. She starred in the 1966 film Georgy Girl. “You’re always window shopping but never stopping to buy.” Rest in peace, scary little Georgy Girl.
George Washington Was a Scofflaw
According to a ledger from New York City’s oldest library, George Washington owes 220 years worth of late fees for two books he checked out during his presidency. The books were due on November 2, 1789, but were never returned, which merits a late fee of about $300,000 at today’s prices, adjusted for inflation. Though the library is not seeking payment of the fines, it would very much like the two books back. One was the “Law of Nations,” a book on international law, and the other was a volume of debates from Britain’s House of Commons.
Dixie Carter Died
Dixie Carter died on Saturday at the age of 70. She was the star of television’s “Designing Women” and was married to Hal Holbrook. Rest in peace, Dixiebird.
John Forsythe Died Friday
John Forsythe died at the age of 92 on Friday. Among his notable accomplishments, he was the voice of Charlie on “Charlie’s Angels.” He is preceded in death by Farah Fawcett, the Most Popular Angel. Rest in peace, Forsythian thespian.
C is Still For Cookie
Concerned “Sesame Street” fans! Do not believe the hype. Cookie Monster still loves his cookies—no matter how much the Big Fruit Industry and The Vegetable Board of America complain about his compulsive sweet tooth.
“He is not the veggie monster,” Gary Knell told the Alibi in an interview earlier today. Knell is the president and CEO of Sesame Workshop, the nonprofit educational organization behind the award-wining children’s staple.
Still, in order to promote healthier nutrition for children, “Sesame Street” producers have limited the Cookie Monster's consumption. Gone are the glorious cookie showers—like Cristal in a Dr. Dre video—during the C-Monster’s signature song, "C is For Cookie.”
“We are doing a lot of work on what we call Healthy Habits for Life, which focuses on simple messages like ‘ sometimes foods,’ " Knell said. "It's a tool to try to promote healthier eating. So a mom in Albuquerque can tell her kid, Look, even the Cookie Monster can't eat cookies all the time."
Now, the Cookie Monster can be seen on TV devouring plates full of kale and apples. To stay true to the his appeal, his profile on the website still lists his likes as, "Cookies, cookies, and more cookies."
“ ‘Saturday Night Live’ accused us of making him the pilates monster," Knell said.
His favorite muppet is Grover, he added. "He's kinda smart, and he drives everyone crazy. I model myself after him.”
So what have you? Who is your favorite muppet?
Check next week’s news section for more of this interview.
I Die. TV Spy Robert Culp Has Passed Away
It’s been a rough week for TV spies. “Mission Impossible’s” Peter Graves died on Monday. Now, Robert Culp, who starred with Bill Cosby in “I Spy,” has fallen and can’t get up. And the saddest part is… he was related to me. On my mother’s side. RIP Uncle Culp.