The FBI says soldiers should get off social media.
Darren Wilson resigned from the Ferguson PD.
Mickey Rourke’s boxing victory was rigged.
A long-lost masterpiece was found in the movie Stuart Little.
How many jokes-per-minute does your favorite sitcom average?
David Bowie hates “The Little Drummer Boy.”
Thanksgiving leftover sandwiches are a thing.
What’s your favorite Mondegreen?
The new Star Wars trailer is out.
The lights are up on Santa Fe plaza.
A Taos woman had a 1972 encounter with a man in a Cosby suit.
Mom ratted on Byron for murder.
Local sub shops were robbed and use only the freshest of ingredients.
Happy birthday, Charlene Tilton.
And now a word from our sponsors.
Does Yelp extort advertising from restaurants?
Ebola is the scariest outbreak of modern times.
Snowden’s thoughts on privacy in the digital age are worth pondering.
The driverless car is coming and you can’t stop it.
The vinyl re-release of the Ghostbusters soundtrack is marshmallow-scented.
Learn how to rob a bank from an expert.
“This is a little song I wrote about the time a female Eagles fan stole my prosthetic leg and the cops got it back for me.”
Someone drew a penis on a Banksy mural.
Bakersfield police are on the lookout for creepy clowns with knives.
Balloon Fiesta is over.
The site of a deadly Rail Runner crash was littered with uncollected body parts.
What’s happening in Albuquerque today?
Happy birthday, Marie Osmond.
A man is suing the Bloomfield, N.M. Burger King; he claims he was attacked by the manager after complaining that his order of onion rings was cold.
Beginning this weekend, The East Mountain Centre for Theatre is presenting an original musical with a catered dinner in Sandia Park.
The Special Shapes Rodeo at Balloon Fiesta this morn included floating objects resembling a cactus, an owl and Yoda, among other flights of fancy.
New Mexico gubernatorial candidate Gary King believes in decriminalizing small amounts of marijuana but incumbent Susana Martinez disagrees.
The 12th annual Soccorrofest happens this weekend and features funky, rockin’ local blues quartet Rhythm Divine.
Going into this weekend’s action, the UNM Volleyball team remains undefeated.
Over at HuffPo, author Sandra Ramos-O’Briant writes about driving from Burque to El Defe in 1967.
Owing to ongoing drought, this year’s Maize Maze is mostly composed of sorghum.
A local man allegedly rode to his appointment with a probation officer on a stolen electric shopping cart.
The Albuquerque Isotopes won on the road last night after losing 6 of 7 in their last home stand.
An ancient species of shrimp lives in Albuquerque.
APD has a brand-new “crisis vehicle."
The City Council is considering raising the gross receipts tax in order to assuage homelessness.
A Burque balloon factory is in the works.
Some of the intersections downtown are dangerous.
Operations at the City’s Police Oversight Committee have officially been suspended.
In recent, local developments:
Allegedly, a very drunk couple took a stroll with their children and a marijuana pipe. They were arrested.
A naked intruder was allegedly found sleeping in someone else’s bed. He was arrested.
According to APD, a woman pulled a gun on a Comcast technician. She was arrested.
APD is getting rid of its Mine Resistant Ambush Protected armored vehicle.
The School of Rock will be housed in downtown Burque.
The Sunport was at the center of a copper theft ring.
Developers are planning to build a hotel modeled after the ruins at Chaco Canyon.
Someone left the sprinklers running in the rain.
UNM’s Director of Government and Community Relations has now been arrested three times for DWI. He has been previously convicted twice for this offense.
After numerous setbacks and a countless number of losing seasons, UNM’s football coach looks to the future.
James Garner died. I guess we knew that was coming.
Putin warns the West. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Hundreds of panties were stolen. Next, I’m stealing gum.
Learn the secret origins of Silly Putty.
I wish I could sleep in a cool bedroom.
I think my phone is infected with electricity-eating bacteria.
Pickpockets are a dying breed.
I shall never RickRoll you again.
The new Star Wars movie will open with a severed hand.
The Danes have a gene that makes them happy, and that makes them feel sad.
Albuquerque teenagers killed homeless people to be mean.
APD’s predictive analysis targets property crimes, hot babes.
Happy birthday, Ernest Hemingway.
Soccer fever may lead to other illnesses.
A German vagina sculpture trapped an ugly American.
The new X-ray gun can see what you’re hiding.
Introducing the $250 hangover cure.
Vodka erases bad smells as well as bad memories.
Stress causes heart attacks by over-producing white blood cells.
Times Square weirdos face a costume crackdown.
Are the French rude? Mais non!
There was a fatal hit-and-run at Carlisle and Indian School.
There was a fatal crash on 2nd Street.
Mushy sparks flew when I saw you.
Happy birthday, Bryan Brown.
Animal Planet's "Finding Bigfoot" was filming in New Mexico again recently.
More cops in downtown Albuquerque -and not just on Weekends?
Edward Snowden seeks asylum in Brazil, offers to help Brazilians prevent the NSA from collecting their metadata, in open letter.
I, for one, do not really want to remember Ray Price.
New Lars Von Trier movie is long, has copious and various depictions of sex and is freaking people out.
If you count up all the months during which it later turned out that Ozzy was off the wagon you may discover that he has never actually been sober at all, ever.
The wizened VP of our company joins our table at the bar. He claims to be up to no good. I offer that he must have some legitimate pursuits. He shakes his head no and asks me if I want to pursue this line of questioning.