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V.22 No.50 |

news

The Daily Word in Coca-Cola's split, a two-headed pig and Senate battles

By Mark Lopez [ Fri Dec 13 2013 10:52 AM ]
The Daily Word

Retired FBI agent Robert Levinson has vanished in Iran, and according to AP, he was doing some work for the CIA.

The Democrats and Republicans are duking it out in the Senate … well, not physically.

Coca-Cola's split in two? What should we do?

Authorities say up to four people were stabbed outside the Sports Authority Field after the Denver Broncos lost to the San Diego Chargers.

A SWAT “situation” has ended peacefully after shots were reported at a home in Rio Rancho.

An Albuquerque school bus driver has been accused of punching a student in the face as he was headed home from Eisenhower Middle School.

The City has paid $900,000 to the family of an unarmed man who was shot and killed by APD in 2011.

Rio Grande High School transformed its gym into Italy for one of its students who has been battling leukemia for the past year.

You ever see a two-headed pig? I wouldn't recommend it.

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V.22 No.30 |

news

The Daily Word in beer can houses, busted child pornography rings and online auctions

By Mark Lopez [ Mon Jul 29 2013 10:51 AM ]
The Daily Word

Pope Francis declares that homosexuals shouldn't be marginalized or judged.

A recent study shows the top food choking hazards for children. Hint: Don't be giving them no hard candy.

In a major sweep, FBI arrest 150 pimps and rescue 105 children in a massive child prostitution ring.

Bill expected to pass which would create better interest rates on student loans, but it's not without its critics.

Officials estimate that the damage is up to $1 million after a severe storm hit Burque on Friday.

Going once! Going twice! Get your New Mexican unclaimed items right here!

19-year-old Justin Covey, who was reported missing yesterday, has been found by Albuquerque police and returned to his parents.

Austin has the Cathedral of Junk. Houston has a house covered in beer cans.

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V.21 No.52 |

news

The Daily Word in New Year's Day.

By Nick Brown [ Tue Jan 1 2013 4:51 PM ]
The Daily Word

The Senate passed a fiscal cliff deal.

People died in a deadly human stampede.

A suspected bomb builder gave birth.

Putin decided Russia has a drinking problem.

It's dangerous to be funny in Egypt.

New Year's Day is a big suicide day.

Take note of celebrity air rage incidents.

A Japanese porn star got 100 of bottles if ick.

What are the most hungover cities in America?

Here's a newborn baby elephant.

Parrots hate electronic music.

The world's biggest treehouse.

A cat enjoys the holidays.

Microscope photos.

APD DWI checkpoint report.

Happy birthday Frank Langella.

Thanks to Susan Petersen, Sarah Bonneau and Helenoid for the links.

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V.21 No.43 | 10/25/2012
Martin Heinrich

Feature

Senate

Heinrich vs. Wilson vs. Barrie vs. Anderson
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V.19 No.46 | 11/18/2010

news

The Daily Word 12.6.10: Don Meredith dies, fishermen find Richard Abruzzo’s body and do the Angnes Moorhead Macarena

By Nick Brown [ Mon Dec 6 2010 10:01 AM ]
The Daily Word

The first pivately owned spaceship will launch tomorrow.

Fishermen have found the bodies of balloonists Richard Abruzzo and Carol Rymer-Davis.

Wikileaks is set to release a Doomsday Machine cache of encrypted documents held hostage against state interference.

Deals in the Senate will most likely extend tax cuts and unemployment benefits.

A deadly baseball struck and killed the catcher.

Meet Edgar Jimenez, the 14-year-old hitman.

The coffee cherry dung of the palm civet produces a remarkably smooth and earthy cup of coffee.

The “Throat of Fire” volcano in Ecuador has erupted. Help. It’s an erupting…volcano.

The sharks are attacking at an Egyptian resort.

Try the pee injection diet.

Michael Cera’s hipster bullshit makes me want to vomit.

Ponder with the Philosorapter.

Can brain damage create false memories?

Don Meredith died in Santa Fe at 72.

“Get out of your truck or the SWAT team will make you get out of your truck.”

Destiny Baca, 18, is accused of selling four marijuana cigarettes to some teenagers. Schocking.

Happy birthday, Agnes Moorhead!

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V.19 No.7 | 2/18/2010

Beer and Guns: The New Peanut Butter and Chocolate?

By Jenny Gamble [ Thu Feb 18 2010 3:44 PM ]

New Mexico legislation, with the support of Charlton Heston’s followers, a.k.a. the National Rifle Association (NRA), have approved in a majority vote that carrying concealed weapons into establishments selling beer and wine will now be legal. Don’t worry; the establishment has to have at least 60% of their sales come from food sales. Well… that certainly puts my mind at ease.  I was a little concerned at first with the whole alcohol and guns things, but it looks like they have it under control. The Senate and the House are in agreement, after all “great minds” think alike; however, the bill will have to be signed into actual law by Governor Richardson before the final pass is made.

The bill is sponsored by Democratic Senator George Munoz, who has inferred that there will be a reduction in reported crimes, since most folks leave their guns in their cars when they go into beer and wine service establishments, and then other folks steal them and commit crimes. Well, with everyone drinking and carrying around guns, this should substantially reduce the crime rate. What?

The law will still prohibit guns in full liquor establishments. Apparently it is much safer to have them around beer or wine than whiskey or Jager bombs. This matter, when addressed on the Senate floor, sparked a key debate over alcohol consumption and folks carrying concealed weapons. Representative Jeff Steinborn, Democrat-Las Cruces asked about the consumption of alcohol, and was answered by Representative John Heaton, Democrat-Carlsbad, “They cannot be inebriated…” My question is how would this be regulated? Would the person with the concealed weapon have to blow into his/her gun? Maybe take it apart really fast and put it back together like that scene in Stripes? Are we going to be patted down now before we go into Red Robin? How will this be regulated? Don’t we already have enough concealed “weapons”, i.e. drugs, knives, etc. making their way into bars and establishments serving beer and wine? Well what’s one more, and at least this one is legal, as long as you aren’t drunk. Someone may want to remind Rep. Heaton that being inebriated in any establishment selling alcohol, with or without a gun, has always been illegal.

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