It’s Wednesday November 26th and this rude ass storm is ruining Thanksgiving!
Meanwhile in Southern California, three six-year-old girls are cooler than we will ever be, and skateboard all the damn time.
In Pakistan, 20-year-old Aansoo Kohli teaches 150 children in a shed, isn’t paid for the job, and is finishing her Bachelors Degree,
And if you’re American and you're reading this from your tent outside Best Buy while you wait for a 99 cent TV, joke's on you! You’re doing it wrong!
A local “cafeteria angel” is paying off student lunch debts at elementary schools anonymously and depositing money into needy families' bank accounts, because apparently some people care about other people?
And while the rest of us are consuming questionable amounts of alcohol this “holiday” season and arguing with our racist in-laws, these dogs are all that really matter this Thanksgiving.
Americans can't do anything right. We can’t even dress ourselves! Which really pisses Kate Midleton off. C'mon, you guys! Get it together!
Merry happy Thanksgiving, or whatever. Don’t drink and drive.
NASA is starting a moon garden.
The Denver Post has appointed a pot editor.
Think up a really good nuclear launch code.
Remember these G.I. Joe PSA parodies?
Dad colored in his kids’ drawings.
This exploding sperm whale is pretty much what I felt like last night.
Does your house have a creepy door?
A nearby skate park bothers Rob Zombie.
Enjoy this seemingly endless menagerie of aging rock stars.
Here’s the scary version of a Miley Cyrus song.
A local man gave a very unhappy Thanksgiving to two dogs.
There were also some very unhappy Thanksgiving car crashes.
Happy birthday Kim Delaney.
The weather is getting wintry and some ABQ kids need help staying warm. Here's where you can donate a coat.
A 14-year old kid was banned from Coronado mall for being punched in the head and called a fag. And then his attacker posted a video of the incident to youtube.
The NSA is watching you masturbate.
President Obama is preparing to pardon a turkey, as presidents have done since 1989.
And since the turkey gets pardoned, it's reasonable to ask: What do they eat at a White House Thanksgiving? Why, another turkey, of course. A very bad turkey who doesn't have a cute name like "Popcorn" and therefore doesn't deserve a pardon, I assume.
You can add this to your repertoire of animal-based similes: "As stealthy as a seahorse."
And finally, my favorite headline of the day: Confusion in Ekiti town as goat delivers human-like baby goat!