It’s Wednesday! How are you? Have you been getting enough sleep and drinking enough water? Don’t get too worried about all the stuff you worry about, because it will all work out. Probably. Just take a deep breath, read these mostly uplifting stories, and remember that you are important and people love you.
The fake baby in American Sniper was snubbed at the Golden Globes. RUDE.
People who care about sports are freaking out about the deflated footballs used during the Patriots game.
Eight of the 43 presidents of the United States never went to college! TAKE THAT, DAD!
Your daily proof that dogs are real life angels.
TLC has created a Kickstarter to help finance a new album.
The highest paid Youtube star is a mysterious woman who clearly loves nail art and opens Disney toys.
President Obama to nominate John Kerry as next Secretary of State.
ESPN analyst receives 30-day suspension for racial remarks against RG3.
New Mexico lawmaker Ben Lujan died Tuesday.
Gangnam Style became the first video on Youtube to reach one billion views.
Congrats, you appear to have survived the Mayan Apocalypse!
On that note, here are the most hilarious tweets about the end of the world.
Former U.S. Olympian apologizes for working as a call girl.
The NRA wants armed police officers in every school across the country.
The story of Graham getting a family for Christmas.
Since its controversial release and subsequent rapid removal, No Doubt’s racist comeback video, “Looking Hot,” has engendered both indictments and shrugs. Marisa Demarco explains why perpetuating racist stereotypes and sexually violent themes in a pop music video matters in Plenty of Doubt.
Anders Behring Brevik, the militant psychopath Norwegian who killed 77 people in July, attributes much of his lethal training to “World of Warcraft” and “Call of Duty.”
George Zimmerman offers the Martin family an apology, has bail set at $150,000.
Santa Fe medical worker says he was fired for being gay.
A breakthrough in breast cancer science.
Albuquerque police shoot another person.
The chicken came first, at least in this instance.
Bears escape from enclosure at Japanese bear park and kill two people.
Pilot of commercial airliner messes up landing because he was texting. Everyone’s OK though, lol.
Book on OKC bombing brings new evidence to light.
German court makes it harder for people to watch YouTube videos.
Kentucky knucklehead siphons gas from a cop car and posts photo to Facebook.
The weird and wide-eyed world of pugs.
Yesterday, while falling down a YouTube hole about weird jazz, I accidentally discovered some vids made just so users could enjoy an Easter egg. It’s been around since 2010, so I’m super late to the party.
Here’s what you do:
• Pause a YouTube video by clicking on the screen
• Hold down the left arrow key for about three seconds. The video will rewind, but don’t worry.
• Hit the up or down arrow, and the classic game of snake should appear on your screen. You can let go of that left arrow and begin controlling the snake normally.
People made special blank screens just for this purpose, though it works on any vid.
I don’t even know what to say about this one. Apparently this video’s been around for the better part of a year. Why, then, has something so magnificent gone under my radar that long? No clue. And I’m not sure what strikes me as more unnerving about it: the robotically flawless choreography, that a five-minute (again, robotically flawless) mariachi-esque tune is being played by what appears to be 5-year-olds dressed as sailors, or the fact that I’ve never achieved anything half as interesting in my life.
WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange is granted bail by the UK court.
A burglar steals a family’s Christmas gifts, dog.
... While these robbers tie up a 12-year-old boy and take his video games.
A bus driver resigns after a YouTube clip shows him running over an innocent snowman.
Sal Alosi, the New York Jets’ strength and conditioning coach, is suspended without pay for the remainder of the season after the tripping incident.
This guy threw a dead squirrel through a Hardee’s drive-thru window.
“Jeopardy!” will pit some of its best contestants against an IBM machine.
Let’s all take a vacation to see the Chernobyl nuclear power plant tour!
A California inmate is granted kosher meals after citing his strong Festivus beliefs.
There was a fatal head-on crash this morning on I-25 near Santa Fe.
They like him over there; Gov. Bill Richardson leaves this afternoon for a private visit with North Korean officials.
Anne Laplantine, "Spring won't find us" (2009)
Listen + download
Ms. Laplantine is a French musician and video artist who lives and works in Paris. While her previous 11 releases mine the sound-art vein of experimental electronica this release debuts her dreamy vocals, layered into thirteen minutes of soul warming future folk. These haunting voals fused with earth-toned landscapes create the compelling musical language this album. She claims that this is her last release, after 9 years of music crafting, to focus on board games and Facebook.
Constrobuz, "Glorious Nippon" (2010)
Listen + download
Chris Papp of Raleigh, North Carolina has been dishing out beat tapes to the web like hot cakes since he was 16. Strictly Beats mention rates Bleep Blorp Remixes as "one of the best tapes ever... on the net." Now he's 19 years old and his followers are hypnotized by his sound. His atypical producing strategies have warped the online hip hop scene.
Glorious Nippon boasts a wirey synth melody, lots of lush, spacey compression, and immaculate drum placement (a Constrobuz signature). This track is based on a sample from the 70's prog rock band CMU.
Lil B, "I'm God" (2010)
Watch and listen at YouTube
Lil B is sensibly retarded. He has a fairly large cult of people who idolize him (his YouTube tracks can sport a quarter million views or more). His lyrics are hilarious, vulgar, psychedelic and unexplainable delivered with a deadpan, lewd-emcee crackhead manner. He claims his name 'Lil B' stands for Lil Boss, but then goes by 'Lil Based.' Either way, half the time he goes by "Based God." At one point he had around 122 myspace pages for his music, each one with a different name.
This track, from the "6 Kiss" album, starts off with a sample from Imogen Heap's "Just For Now" --her dreamlike vocals serenading on the beat. He goes on rapping about absolute nonsense. Or maybe there's meaning. Who knows? Some people think Lil B is dragging this ego along to become the next Lil Wayne. Some think he's the new Wesley Willis. Regardless, I think he needs to keep doing what he's doing. Because he's working and producing thousands plus me are hooked.
(ED's note: Lil B is defininitely a strange phenomenon. Check out his 'positive' track "Age of Information" plus tracks like "Wonton Soup," "I'm a Fag I'm a Lesbian" & "Like a Martian" for a better scope of this peculiar voice in hip hop.)