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V.26 No.8 | 2/23/2017

Idiot Box

Go For the Gold

“The Oscars” on ABC

Although there are more worthy contenders among the night’s nominees, odds are high you’ll be hearing the words “And the Oscar goes to ... La La Land” a lot.
imperial walker
Samuel Kerwin

Feature: Film Guide

2017 Oscar Ballot

Use this year’s Weekly Alibi-generated Academy Awards ballot to shock co-workers, impress neighbors or just to enjoy the tastiest fruit from this year’s filmic tree!

V.25 No.8 | 02/25/2016

Leo D gets the O

And it's about goddamn time.

My dear, sweet angel, Leo D:

When I was watching Titanic for the first time when I was like six or seven with my mom, I cried because that dumbass Rose didn’t actually love you enough to scoot the fuck over. Everyone else and their Mom (like, literally) would jump into the deathly freezing water because why the fuck wouldn’t you? The character Jack Dawson was too good for that alternate universe.

I mean, I knew you were really alive, but I was so moved by your performance that you became Jack Dawson in my mind for a few years until I saw the next film that you were in (that I had access to), Catch Me If you Can. “Oh my gawd, he’s so charming,” I thought in my stupid 13-year-old brain, “I’d toooootally marry him. I probably have a chance after puberty … Yeah, definitely.” After puberty it changed to, “I’d toooootally tap that,” because it was like 2004 and that’s how we talked then, “but liiiike circa 1999.” Then a few years later, I realized you are perfect and age like cheese and I would do whatever you want.

Like, you wanna go get ice cream? Sure. Want me to read King Lear to you? Of course. Teach you how to play the viola? I’ll try, honey-buns. Lock you up in chains and run a sander over them honey buns?

W h a t e v e r y o u w a n t.

I digress.

When you won at the Golden Globes for Best Actor and “shared” it with all the first nations people and indigenous people all over the world? Be still my beating (and bleeding) social justice heart. And now you’re using your win as a platform to address climate change??? You ANGEL. I just checked your Facebook page and you posted about the Peruvian Amazon Rainforest oil spill (which has barely been covered by most mainstream media sources). I think I’m dead. I died. Goodbye. (jk, calm down.)
“His Smile was one of those rare smiles that you may come across four or five times in life. It seemed to understand you and believe in you just as you would love to be understood and believed in.”

Get it, Leo. You get it all day.

V.25 No.9 | 3/3/2016

news

The Daily Word in Leonardo DiCaprio, Donald Trump and Starbucks

The Daily Word

The day has come where we bid farewell to what we thought would be never ending memes. Leonardo DiCaprio has finally one an Oscar. *tears of joy and support*

The day Donald Trump swallowed the foot he keeps shoving in his mouth.

Donald Trump may not be a big hit but these piñata’s definitely are.

Starbucks sizes are actually going to mean something in Italy.

Catch me putting away my bag of chips and actually sticking to my New Years resolution with this new fitness program coming to Albuquerque.

The future is now. Or just another ridiculous new trend.

V.25 No.8 | 2/25/2016
Chris Rock Oscars Commercial: New Year's Eve

Idiot Box

Oscar Odds

“The Oscars” on ABC

What are the odds on this year’s Academy Award contenters? We turn to the oddsmakers for answers.
V.24 No.9 | 2/26/2015

Film News

Polishing the Old Oscar

A Monday morning wrap-up of this year’s Academy Awards

The good, the bad and the weird of this year’s Academy Awards telecast.

news

The Daily Word in monster trucks, gold statuettes, and the end of human civilization

The Daily Word

With the help of skilled drivers, a few dozen homosapiens on the West coast of North America transported small metal statuettes back to their lavish dwellings in elongated automobiles.

Why was Joan Rivers left out of the 'In Memorium' montage of The Oscars?

How do they pick the Oscar Winners?

11 students at Wesleyan were hospitalized after overdosing on MDMA, also known as 'Molly.'

A driver crashed into an electrical pole that knocked out the power to Tingley Coliseum right before the Monster Truck Jam. The intentional crashes of the spectacle were unaffected.

Why were these weird food patents unsuccessful?

The already questionable reputation of Downtown Albuquerque is being tarnished by late-night brawls.

Poor little spaceport.

If anyone knows what will destroy human civilization, it’s Stephen Hawking.

Are You More Like Jennifer Lawrence Or Emma Stone? Take the quiz!

Peter Fonda turns 75 today!

V.24 No.8 | 02/19/2015

news

The Daily Word in Oscar Sunday, marriage licenses and New Mexico killers

The Daily Word

The Oscars are on Sunday, y'all! The New York Times has the Oscar predictions here.

Holy crap! It's a real sharknado! Kinda ...

Two Detroit parents who reported their son missing while holding him captive in their basement have been charged with torture.

After a lesbian couple was granted a marriage license in Travis County, Texas, the state's attorney general is rushing to have their marriage declared “void” and “invalid.”

Basically: If you don't want a parking ticket, don't park on Central Avenue.

Silver City parents are outraged at the fact that the school ran out of lunches for the kids for the second time this year.

Hear some of the “bizarre” stories of New Mexico's most notorious female killers.

After being suspended for makin' whoopee with some of his patients, Dr. Christopher Driskill is being allowed to go back to work.

Ewwww ... that's a lot of poop on that road.

V.24 No.8 | 2/19/2015

Idiot Box

Any Given Oscar Sunday

“The Oscars” on ABC

Where to get all your Oscar night coverage on Sunday.
V.23 No.9 | 2/27/2014

Film News

86th Academy Awards Nominees Ballot

Here we are, once again, staring down a list of the best films of the year (according to the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, anyway). But who will claim the big prizes come Oscar night? Let’s take a look at who’s won what awards and honors already.

[ more >> ] [ permalink ]


V.23 No.3 |

news

The Daily Word a football camel's death, NSA's data and a photographing poser

The Daily Word

President Obama says he will “end the National Security Agency’s ability to store phone data collected from millions of Americans.” Sure …

A 4-year-old girl in Detroit accidentally shot and killed her 4-year old cousin.

In case you haven't heard, the 2014 Academy Award nominations are out!

A voting law in Pennsylvania that would require people to show photo ID's at the polls was struck down.

ABQ police are on the lookout for man claiming to be a UNM photography student who takes photos of girls.

Congress has cut funding for horse slaughter operations by passing a $1.1 trillion budget bill that prohibits the Department of Agriculture from spending money on inspectors for equine facilities.

In the aftermath of Tuesday's Berrendo Middle School shooting in Roswell, N.M., police are looking at suspect Mason Campbell's Instagram page to see if it bears any relevance.

Elias Montoya, a New Mexico State Police officer who was fired for opening fire on a minivan full of kids in Taos, gives his side of the story.

Princess, a football-predicting camel, dies weeks ahead of Super Bowl. RIP.

V.22 No.8 | 2/21/2013

Film

Raise Your Glassies, Don Your Dressies

The Unofficial Drinking Game for the 2013 Oscars

There is no getting around the fact that no matter how much you popcorn you make, no matter how many times you take that “one last trip” to the candy table, no matter how many live-tweeting parties you view, the Oscars are just sort of boring. Over the last few years, the games have been running at around 4 hours. Add in 2 or so hours of pre-show-red-carpet-shenanigans and you’ve got yourself one freaking ridiculously long night.

And what better way to pass that than with a little drinking game? With the help of the folks at the Huffington Post, nextmovie.com, and a few ideas from my own little brain, I’ve compiled the official Unofficial Drinking Game for the 2013 Oscars. Hit the jump for prompts to keep your night interesting, informational and classy. And please, please, please … be responsible.

On the Red Carpet take a drink every time:

• A celebrity evades a question.

• Someone says they are "so excited to be here."

• A celebrity is photobombed.

• A celebrity is asked who they are wearing.

• You see a celebrity who brought a parent/family member as their date.

• Someone wears a truly hideous dress (yes, we'll leave that up to your own discretion).

• A man wears two-toned shoes with a suit/tux

During the Oscars take a drink each time:

• Someone thanks their parents and/or God.

• Someone acknowledges Meryl Streep.

• A loser begrudgingly smiles to the camera.

• Someone says they didn't have a speech prepared.

• Seth MacFarlane cracks a failed joke.

• Seth McFarlane does a cartoon voice.

• The camera cuts to Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner.

• The band tries to cut off someone's speech.

• Someone cries.

• Someone curses on stage and is bleeped out.

• Someone says, "I couldn't have done this without … "

• J-Law says something “charmingly unscripted.”

• A winner uses their speech time as a political/environmental/humanitarian platform.

• Someone says they didn't have a speech prepared.

• Someone mentions the Grammy wardrobe restrictions

• Someone winks at the camera

• A cartoon character is shows wearing Oscar-worthy clothing.

Finish your drink if:

• Jennifer Lawrence wins Best Actress and the camera pans to Meryl Streep.

• One of the cast of Les Misérables sings.

• Adele gets a standing ovation after singing “Skyfall.”

Reel World

Reel World

Oscar Party!

The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences is once sponsoring an officially sanctioned Oscar party at Albuquerque’s historic KiMo Theatre. New Mexico Film and Media Day will take place at the State Legislature in Santa Fe on Friday, Feb. 22.

Idiot Box

“The 85th Annual Academy Awards” on ABC

Who’s Hosting?

The annual Academy Awards telecast strikes again this coming Sunday. Every year, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences hands out golden statues to the films and filmmakers its members think are most deserving. And every year, millions of Americans wonder if they should care—and if so, how much?
V.22 No.3 | 1/17/2013

news

The Daily Word in Oscar nominations, Baseball Hall of Shame, tape faces

The Daily Word

Complete list of Oscar nominations for 2013. Who are the snubs and shockers?

The Jacksonville Jaguars fired their head coach.

Albuquerque man who said he lost his memory showed up at a McDonald's in Colorado with no idea how he got there or where he was from.

Jerry Sandusky begins process of appeal for sex abuse conviction.

Britney’s leaving the X Factor.

No new members were elected this year to the Baseball Hall of Fame (thanks a lot, steroids).

Are you the last to see this Albuquerque photographer’s Scotch Tape Series?

Everybody calm down, the whales are fine!

Boston declared itself in a state of flu emergency after more than 700 confirmed cases were reported throughout the city.

The incredible, edible, valuable bacon dragon.

Yar, buried treasure in a Black Sea fortress.

Thanks to Nick Brown and Brennan for help with the links.

 

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