They found a fancy secret railway tunnel between San Diego and Tijuana.
Chinese submarines can get us.
An angry bar brawler brandished a chainsaw.
The determined mouse struggled with his cracker.
Here’s my vote for coolest Halloween candy.
What’s the most popular Halloween candy?
Bone up on blood sucking with this TED-Ed vampire cartoon.
Should we build a Death Star?
We’re closer to understanding why warm water freezes faster than cold water.
Watch out for nostril ticks.
Somebody stole a donation box from Donut Mart.
Spend some time with the street apes of Jakarta.
The simian theme just does not quit at the Weekly Alibi, mostly thanks to longtime art director Tom Nayder’s fearless refusal to back down from the challenge of finding excuses to put his hairy best friends on the cover. (We have it on good authority that he does in fact harbor a chimp in his home.) Feast your eyes on 18 eye-gouging, monkey-riffic covers after the jump.
Kentucky Derby winner’s owner has been accused of drugging his horses.
Trash on your sidewalk?
Jon Stewart on the Prez’ gay marriage stance.
The guy who was accused of shooting a speeding-ticket van in Santa Fe got released.
Further proof on why Florida sucks.
And why Texas also sucks.
It’s horseshoe crab orgy season!
South African apes like getting hammered and messing with stupid tourists.
This 70-year-old who claims to be a virgin is awesome, and also batshit crazy.
Beastie Boys “Chappelle Show” video you probably haven’t seen.
Buffalo rampages through Edgewood, N.M.
Former Gov. Gary Johnson ditches the GOP and goes Libertarian in his quest to become president of these United States.
Should be a $4.2 million surplus in the state budget. Gov. Susana Martinez wants to spend it on college prep programs.
Barbie is a hoarder.
Best insta-celebs of the year.
The 10 most absurd quotes about women in 2011.
Apes to video chat on iPads.
Wendy's $16 foie gras burger.
At Vow's Bar in Tokyo patrons are served by real Buddhist monks.
The professional laugher.
The Albuquerque man who rescued an abducted girl is in the U.S. illegally.
LOOK OUT! More People of Walmart (Thank you, Sarah.)
400 new words added to latest edition of the Oxford English Dictionary.
Lighting a cigarette while using nail polish remover? Stop... NOW!
A lesson in pre-digital newspaper production.
Are there too many farmer's markets?
Oh, God. The 12th annual Gathering of the Juggalos.
Are cell phones making men sterile?
Dateline, 1967: in the future, the use of well-trained apes as family chauffeurs might decrease the number of automobile accidents.