alibi online
Free Will AstrologyAlibi's Personals
 

cats


V.25 No.25 | 06/23/2016

News

The Daily Word in child slavery, doping and voting

The Daily Word

Child slavery is still a major problem in the chocolate industry.

DO NOT attempt to make your dog or cat vegan or vegetarian.

The age to buy tobacco in Chicago will now be 21.

The world doesn't believe Trump can do it.

Read new secrets!

A nearly 100-million-year old bird wing has been found encased in amber.

President Obama is showing five things that are more difficult than registering to vote.

John Oliver tackled doping in his most recent episode.

Crime scene blood can now tell the age range of a person.

V.25 No.25 | 6/23/2016

Restaurant Review

Cats, Cookies and So Much More

Patrons of Gatos y Galletas will feel right at home

Gatos y Galletas isn’t your average Albuquerque cafe.
V.25 No.20 | 05/19/2016

The Daily Word in Fuzzy Ethics, Cat Tongues and Awful News

The Daily Word

Researchers at the Lewis Katz School of Medicine at Temple University have successfully removed HIV DNA from the cells of living animals. That's a game-changer, folks.

Every cat owner knows the pain of being unable to lick their feline buddy. Thank the stars someone was brave enough to develop a tongue-shaped cat brush that you hold in your mouth!

Obama authorized a drone-strike yesterday that apparently "took care of" the leader of the Taliban. Most of the time, real life sounds like a rap video. Blat blat, mother mother.

According to Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, it's actually harder to remember the unethical things you've done. That's right. When you lie, steal or cheat, your brain does its best to fudge up the details so you can still think you're a good person. Real talk: You're not.

Speaking of terrible people: Erica Garcia, a 29-year-old ABQ resident who got her 15 minutes of fame three years ago when she left her baby in a hot car, allegedly flipped her vehicle over at Mountain and Woodward yesterday. She told officers she drank 30 beers before the accident. Oh, did I mention there was a two-year-old riding with her, and that they didn't have a seat belt on? The child was critically injured and is currently fighting for their life in the hospital.

The news is foul. Put your phone down and go outside, instead. It's beautiful out there.

V.25 No.18 | 05/05/2016
/ Creative Commons

Event Horizon

What's New Pussycat?

Saturday, May 14: Feline Fiesta Cat Show

Purebred cats and kittens compete for Best of Show. On-site adoptions and shopping are also part of the fun. Proceeds benefit feline rescue groups.
V.25 No.15 | 04/14/2016

The Daily Word in Animals, Science and Exploiting Teen Girls

The Daily Word

So a cop got basically no punishment for following an unarmed man and shooting him dead.

Could this simple solution really help end sexual assault on American campuses?

Bernie Bros come in all sizes and varieties. Fantastic.

Animals don't give a fuck about you and your nonsense.

In a survey of over 1,000 people, researchers were able to confirm something everyone already knew. What a good way to spend time and money.

Have you ever been so infatuated with someone that you didn't notice a crime happening right in front of you?

“I’m 28. I make $4 million a year. What do you do?” yells the man-child douche-bag, David Brackett.

Some horrible young men in town have been caught exploiting teen girls.

V.25 No.14 | 04/07/2016

News

The Daily Word in Boko Haram, cute cats and the island of 20,000 graves

The Daily Word

FoodNetwork's "Chopped" is looking for contestants from New Mexico.

On the other hand, some people shouldn't even enter the kitchen for their own safety.

Sandia Peak owners want to ruin the serenity of the Sandias with a goddamn rollercoaster.

Here is the lapel camera video from when the recent Amber Alert ended with the discovery of 9-month-old Ariana.

Boko Haram has proved itself to be even more evil by increasing their number of child suicide bombers 10 fold.

Governor McCrory now wants to protect employee rights but still doesn't see the problem with his anti-LGBT bill.

The island of 20,000 graves is not Stephen King's newest novel.

Two Russian warplanes simulated an attack on a US guided missile ship.

Pictures of animals help improve your mood, so here ya go.

V.25 No.10 | 03/10/2016

The Daily Word in Cat Accents, Tasty Plastic and Appreciative Robots

The Daily Word

Do cats have dialects? A new study plans on wasting five years and a shit-ton of money to find out the difference between mreow and meow.

NM lawmakers barely use their work email, and some of them seemed to have trouble responding to records request.(Ahem. We're looking at you, Gov. Martinez).

A new bacteria has been discovered that eats plastic. Keep it away from Heidi Montag!

No one pays attention to all the hard work you put in at the office? Don't start spitting in the water cooler; get yourself a Pat-On-the-Back machine. (The manufacturers of Pat-On-the-Back do not approve the use of their product for the patting of anything other than backs).

Dude found passed outin his car in the middle of Coors at 2pm with a bag of shrooms in the back seat next to his toddler. There's a lesson in there...

Hyperloop CEO showed off concepts for "augmented windows." Picture looking out a train at the Triassic period. Weird.

V.25 No.4 | 01/28/2016

news

The Daily Word in Google Cardboard, an unhappy anniversary and a cat mobbed by toy mice

The Daily Word

Today is the anniversary of the discovery of 11 women's bodies on Albuquerque's West Mesa.

Google is bringing their "Google Cardboard" virtual reality to local schools.

New Mexico Senators begin discussing the Real ID bill today.

This woman is demanding a lifetime supply of Kit Kat bars.

Government officials worry about stronger encryption thwarting their surveillance

Uber drivers complain that they aren't being compensated fairly.

Here's a great cat picture from the internet.

V.24 No.51 | 12/17/2015
Lucky Paws via Facebook

Event Horizon

A Howlin' Good Time

Sunday, Dec 27: Howl-i-day Give Back Tour 2015

Help support the city's adoption site with the highest adoption rate and lowest return rate. Make a donation and select a new dog or cat toy to go into the giant stocking.

The Daily Word in a cafe for cats, a lost Lobo player, and the Beatles

The Daily Word

As of tomorrow night Apple will no longer hold the monopoly on the Beatles.

An analysis of political branding in 2015.

Though Donald Trump is now leading republican polls, Huffington Post tells us why we may still have hope.

Bernie Sanders lays a sick burn on Donald Trump and that's all I wanted to happen.

Albuquerque will open it's first cat cafe in 2016!

The latest information on the Lobo football player killed last night.

V.24 No.46 | 11/12/2015
/ Wikimedia Commons

Flash Fiction

The House on Silver Avenue

I am going to need another tug off that bottle of Thunderbird if I am going to go down there and rescue one of those kittens said Charlie to the spare but shabby living room of the house on Silver Avenue.

Chauncy was in the room under the stairs which contained a sink, a shower and crapper. He did not hear Charlie talking nonsense about the cats because he was getting ready for his evening shift at the steakhouse. Chauncy was frantically trying to coax chicken fat stains out of his black trousers with a toothbrush and a bottle of Florida Water.

The others were in the first-floor bedroom, across from all of that. They couldn't hear Charlie either. Michael was smoking dirt weed out of a pipe he had carved from an apple, reclining like royalty on the bed while his stunned girlfriend Sherri sat in the corner picking glitter out of her hair and counting Jeffersons. They moved in last week and Charlie knew them about as well as any of the other punk rockers from across the street.

Charlie looked around and realized he was speaking to empty space, chatting with the void. He got up and dragged himself to the kitchen. Tim Lodgeson was in there cooking a chicken in the microwave. He had the whole thing in the oven for ten minutes while the two of them sat around jawing about school. Charlie couldn't make heads or tails of what Lodgeson told him. It was something about forests and capitalism.

When the meat came out it was gray. It had the appearance of plastic. Tim took the bird and skewered it with a big silver serving fork he had taken from the cafeteria last semester, around Thanksgiving. He started gnawing on the chicken as if he had not eaten for a week, like he had conquered a small but vicious dinosaur with teeth and technology.

Charlie excused himself politely, gagged and walked out onto the back porch. He could hear the kittens in the basement mewling for their mother. The hell with the Thunderbird, he thought, I sure would like a new pet cat. Further reasoning that such an outcome would be a pleasant surprise for his girlfriend, he sauntered down the stairs and into the darkness.

He felt his way around for a bit until he could reach out and pull on the chain that turned on the light bulb in the middle of basement. Sure enough, there was a litter of cats in the basement. Their mother was nowhere to be seen. Charlie crept over to snatch up a tiny calico.

An eruption of teeth and fur and hair and blood coincided with that action as the hidden mother pounced. The living fury would not come off him, though he clawed and clawed at it. He retreated and was filled up with a queasy combination of shame and horror. The damn thing finally let up when he got to the door, lunging for the knob and hitting his head on the concrete as he fell toward the yard.

Back inside of the house on Silver Avenue, Michael and Sherri had crept out their room and were watching Hee Haw in the big front room. Chauncy was in the kitchen critiquing Tim's culinary procedures as he attempted to saw a leg off of what was left of the poultry experiment. Chauncy was dressed for work now. He looked like a million bucks and was being awfully careful not to get any schmaltz on his waiter's uniform as he danced around Tim's meaty methodologies.

As the two went on and on about the wonders of microwave cooking and with the mellow sounds of George Jones drifting through the whole place, Charlie entered from the porch. He asked for a wet towel and wondered aloud where his bottle of wine might have gotten to. Saturday night had just begun.

V.24 No.42 | 10/15/2015
vancouverisawesome.com

Event Horizon

Spooky Pooches

Saturday, Oct 24: Watermelon Mtn Ranch Halloween Pet Costume Contest

Dress up your pet and win prizes!
V.24 No.36 | 9/3/2015

news

The Daily Word: Zombies on a plane, living life on a train and the FBI getting sued

The Daily Word

Man found doing household chores in woman’s house.

Missing cat causes taunting phone calls to owner.

The Associated Press sues FBI for fake news story.

Virginia teen faces 11 years in prison for controlling Twitter account in supports of ISIS and helps friend travel to join group.

Why pay rent when you can live in a train and travel?

50 bodies found in an abandoned truck in eastern Austria.

Driving instructor leaves 70 teenagers high and dry by taking their money and leaving them without receiving their drivers license.

Sea-level rising could be potentially disaster.

AMC puts Zombies in the sky.

V.24 No.22 | 5/28/2015

news

The Daily Word in sumo wrestling, salmonella, Santolina and Sun Ra

The Daily Word

Barclays plans to build Santolina: an entirely new city just outside Albuquerque.

40,000 bees were found under this woman’s bedroom floor.

See a bee grow up in 60 seconds.

Italy warns consumers of a Prosecco shortage.

A salmonella outbreak in the US linked to sushi tuna has sickened more thank 50 people.

An adult dating site was hacked, publicly revealing its users’ kinky turn-ons.

Judge Judy delivered the commencement speech at Shiprock High.

Here’s a glimpse into the life of a sumo wrestler.

These portly cats and dogs are participating in a pet slimming contest.

Herman Blount, AKA Sun Ra was born on this day in 1914, supposedly on the planet Saturn. Space is the Place!

V.24 No.8 | 02/19/2015
Instagram user amandastclaire

contest

This Week's Instagram Photo Contest Winner!

#alibipets February 13-19, 2015

This week's contest simultaneously melted our hearts and brains. It's hard to decide a winner when every dang picture is the cutest thing on planet earth.

Here's a few of our favorites:

But since there can only be one winner, we all agreed Instagram user amandastclaire's picture turned our hearts into applesauce!

Congratulations, amandastclaire! We have $10 alibi bucks for you and a surprise waiting for you at our office! You can email amelia@alibi.com to redeem your prizes!

Stay tuned for next week's photo contest guidelines!

 

  • Select sidebar boxes to add below. You can also click and drag to rearrange the boxes; close using the little X icons on each box. To re-add a box you closed, return to this menu.
  • Because you are not logged in, any changes you make to these boxes will vanish as soon as you click to another page. If you log in, the boxes will stick.
  • alibi.com
  • Latest Posts
  • Web Exclusives
  • Recent Rocksquawk Discussions
  • Recent Classifieds
  • Latest User Posts
  • Most Active Users
  • Most Active Stories
  • Calendar Comments
  • Upcoming Alibi Picks
  • Albuquerque
  • Duke City Fix
  • Albuquerque Beer Scene
  • What's Wrong With This Picture?
  • Reddit Albuquerque
  • ABQ Journal Metro
  • ABQrising
  • ABQ Journal Latest News
  • Del.icio.us Albuquerque
  • NM and the West
  • New Mexico FBIHOP
  • Democracy for New Mexico
  • Only in New Mexico
  • Mario Burgos
  • Democracy for New Mexico
  • High Country News
  • El Grito
  • NM Politics with Joe Monahan
  • Stephen W. Terrell's Web Log
  • The Net Is Vast and Infinite
  • Slashdot
  • Freedom to Tinker
  • Is there a feed that should be on this list? Tell us about it.
    DUKE IT OUT
    DUKE IT OUT9.28.2016