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V.25 No.36 | 09/08/2016

Weekly Weather Report

Week of Sept. 13-19

By Megan Reneau [ Tue Sep 13 2016 3:00 PM ]

Today through Thursday it will be partly cloudy with a high of about 82° and not much of a chance of precipitation throughout the day. Friday will be sunny with a high of 83°. Saturday thunderstorms should pop up across the world, particularly on the East Side of Albuquerque, causing damnation for about 50-90% of the Earth's population (pesky holy water monsoons). Skies clear up for the end of the weekend on through to next week. See you next week, sinner!

V.25 No.34 | 08/25/2016

Week of Aug. 30-Sep. 5

By Megan Reneau [ Tue Aug 30 2016 2:52 PM ]

Clouds have been rolling through the metro area all day, so there's seemingly a chance of rain this afternoon. Yesterday it was the same situation but someone decided not to follow through with the rain so we all just had to watch it pass us by. Maybe someone will follow through with the signs that they give today. Tomorrow will be about the same, so we have that to look forward to. Things are going to start to heat up on Friday with a high of 86 degrees Fahrenheit, so don't throw your summer wardrobe in the trash compacter, yet (though advised by The City Fashion Council). Next week will be sunny with mild temps, almost like autumn really exists. But of course it does. We aren't all bodies floating in goo being prodded at by reptilian aliens.

V.25 No.32 | 08/11/2016

Week of Aug. 16-22

By Megan Reneau [ Tue Aug 16 2016 3:31 PM ]

Today has been pretty cloudy and this evening we can expect rain and some wind up to 15 mph. Wednesday will be less cloudy but slightly cooler with a high of 89º. Thursday will be sunny and breezy. Friday will be basically the same as Thursday. Pure sunshine all weekend long with a gentle breeze. Monday looks like it will be as cloudy as today (if not more) and cooler with stronger breezes and some hateful glances from the neighbor that died four and a half years ago, Gods rest their soul. I predict next Tuesday will be rainy. Don't forget; it's a safe bet for the rest of the month that it'll rain during the nighttime, so bring an umbrella when you're escaping your gray alien-invaded home in the middle of the night. Happy monsoon season!

V.25 No.11 | 03/17/2016
morguefile.com

Event Horizon

Foul Weather Friend

Saturday, Mar 26: Skywarn Spotter Training

By Joshua Lee [ Thu Mar 24 2016 11:00 AM ]
Kerry Jones teaches how to recognize dangerous weather conditions, when and how to report it, and how to be prepared and avoid getting injured.
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V.20 No.3 |

news

The Daily Word 01.26.11: Local Vigilantes, Dark Matter, Big Bras

By Tom Nayder [ Wed Jan 26 2011 10:16 AM ]
The Daily Word

Obama gave his State of the Union speech last night. Here are some highlights, and lowlights.

Local teen vigilantes kick some ass.

Hey ladies, this guy needs a girlfriend.

Farmington man uses homemade receipts to steal $25,000 worth of electronics from Sam's Club.

New bill under consideration would fine motorists for driving too-close to bicyclists.

Could dark matter really be aliens?

Flavor Flav is starting a fried-chicken franchise.

Mark Bittman ends his Minimalist column after 13 years.

You have died of dysentery. The Oregon Trail turns 40.

Is it possible to love a dog enough to pay $35 for a scented candle?

You know what makes me happy? Bras.

Eat This, Not That's six worst coffee drinks.

NASA discovers a loose star.

I don't know, why do storm clouds have flat tops?

Look at these transparent animals.

Happy birthday Bob Uecker!

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