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The Daily Word with Migraines, Mullah Omar and Manatees

Taliban leader Mullah Omar may be dead.

House Republicans pass a crazy Tea Party debt plan.

Albuquerque judge arrested and charged with rape.

Michelle Bachmann gives gets migraines.

Former Santa Fe county sheriff faces 250 counts of embezzlement.

Check out this fake Chinese Apple Store.

Leopard mauls 11 people in India.

Photos from a ghost town in Cyprus, untouched by humans for almost 40 years.

McDonald's will open a 10,000 square foot, double-decker restaurant in London, for the 2012 Summer Olympics.

Your crazy wife will love these crazy milk ads.

Game of Thrones adds two new cast members.

What was the coxoplectoptera?

75 ex-football players sue the NFL for concealing brain injury risks.

The Hubble Space Telescope discovers a new moon around Pluto.

The Tea Party vs. manatees.

South Park will continue for at least two more seasons.

Loch Ness-type cryptid sighted in Alaska.

Here's the new Spike Jonze directed Beastie Boys video!

Happy Birthday Dean Winters!!!

Cryptid Alert

Cryptid Alert: There’s a new photograph of the Loch Ness Monster.

Humps.
Humps.

Amid recent speculation that Nessie was finally dead, monster lovers can breathe a sigh of relief. Landscape designer Richard Preston has produced the latest conclusive evidence of a living prehistoric monster in Scotland. Whew.

Cryptid Alert

Cryptid Alert: Giant, Fanged Peruvian Nose Leeches

Before
Before

Yes, Virginia, there are giant nose leeches. (Thanks to Eric Johnson for the hot news tip.)

In Albuquerque, a sure sign of spring is the enormic toad emerging from the dirt by the chicken pen. (Thanks to X-14 for the toad photos.)

After
After
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    Cryptid Alert: Bigfoot Researcher Autumn Williams Gives Up Bigfoot Research

    Play Youtube Video
     

    Autumn Williams has had it. She’s done researching the yeti, and explains why here for ten minutes, then continues explaining why for another two videos on her Oregon Bigfoot Blog. I, for one, am deeply saddened that she won’t be howling and banging logs in the woods anymore. Here she is in happier times discussing the yeti, and here she is playing her favorite song. And here’s a different girl performing a song about the Georgia Bigfoot Hoax. And here is the band Sasquatch.

    More Videos

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      Cryptid Alert! Polish Yeti Ogles Bikini Babe.

      Play Youtube Video
       

      19-year-old cootie model Justyna Folger was innocently wobbling around in a dirty old brook while a lecherous freund secretly videotaped her bottom. Suddenly, a yeti occurred. Do you see the yeti? Um. Kinda, I guess.

      More Videos

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        Cryptid Alert! My Dream Girl!

         
         

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        Cryptid Alert! My Dream Girl!

         
         

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        Cryptid Alert! Diplodicus in Albuquerque!

         
         

        A bus driver saw a Diplodicus step over a fence in Albuquerque. Reportedly.

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        Cryptid Alert! Slimy Lifeform Discovered in Sewer!

        Play Youtube Video
         

        Thanks to Robert Masterson for showing me this footage of slimy, pulsating things living in a North Carolina sewer pipe. The images were captured by a construction company using snake cameras to inspect sewer lines. It hurts my balls just to look at it.

        The current explanation is that these are colonies of tubifex worms. Yeah, as if.

        More Videos

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        Cryptid Alert: Yeti!

         
         

        It came in the mail yesterday from Crow Jackson! So life-like...

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          Cryptid Alert: Fairy

           
           

          Hey, somebody got a picture of a fairy. Finally!

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          Cryptid Alert. Sigh.

           
           

          Mormon missionaries saw some yeti footprints.

          At the same time, someone has come forward claiming to have created the yeti costume used in the famous Patterson footage.

          And even at the same time, alleged recordings of yeti vocalizations have been (possibly) debunked.

          My life is a lie.

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          Cryptid Alert! It Was A Hoax!

          Don’t look so surprised.

          Thanks for the Yeti, O’Leary
          Thanks for the Yeti, O’Leary

          First things first. Check out the awesome yeti toy O’Leary brought me from Hong Kong.

          Now down to business. The frozen Bigfoot (aka the Georgia Gorilla, aka the Rickmat Creature) turned out to be a frozen ape costume. What became of the Southern Gentlemen who found him? They skipped out in the middle of the night with a big bag of money.

          This whole idea might have sounded funny when they were completely stoned, but to actually go through with it? The perfect crime!

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          Cryptid Alert! Bigfoot Body Press Conference!

          Play Youtube Video
           

          As promised, the two Southern Gentlemen who found the bigfoot body held their press conference today. CNN has coverage online but nobody has the plug in to watch it, so here it is on YouTube.

          More Videos

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          Cryptid Alert! Bigfoot Body!

           
           

          I’ve been sitting on this one for a while, but it’s coming to a boil. A couple of dudes found a dead bigfoot in Georgia and have it on ice. I thought they weren’t going to let anyone see it until September, but I guess they were too excited to wait. Photographs and DNA evidence will be unveiled this Friday at noon by the guys who found the body and yeti mogul Tom Biscardi.

          Loren “Can-You-Spare-A-Yeti” Coleman reports this breaking news on his Cryptomundo site and seems oddly convinced that it may be legit. I hope this one turns out better than the alien video that was getting hyped earlier this summer. Or that whole “Al Capone’s Vault” thing. Or “Ghost Hunters.” Or “The Jetsons.”

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            NM Sol Splash Reggae Fest
            NM Sol Splash Reggae Fest6.29.2013