V.25 No.16 | 04/21/2016
Dream Blog #360
By Megan Reneau [ Mon Apr 25 2016 4:06 PM ]
My dog Igloo and I launch into space from the front pasture at my parents' house. It's nighttime, and the sky is a dark blue with the lights of the Milky Way dotted across the expanse. Actually, it's less of a launch and more of a jump. After we pass the atmosphere, I can't tell how much progress we're making because there's barely a breeze. It's black around us scattered with distant stars, but I still see the glow of the Earth creeping up from behind us.
I look at Igloo and pet his head. I look down at the Earth—round and innocent—and it's slowly drifting away. I notice a red string tied to my ankle and his ankle that go all the way back down to somewhere on the surface of our planet. I look up toward Mars, far in the distance, and then back to Iggy. He rolls over so I can rub his belly while we travel.
I wake up.
V.25 No.15 | 04/14/2016
The Daily Word in Animals, Science and Exploiting Teen Girls
By Megan Reneau [ Thu Apr 14 2016 12:17 PM ]
So a cop got basically no punishment for following an unarmed man and shooting him dead.
Could this simple solution really help end sexual assault on American campuses?
Bernie Bros come in all sizes and varieties. Fantastic.
Animals don't give a fuck about you and your nonsense.
In a survey of over 1,000 people, researchers were able to confirm something everyone already knew. What a good way to spend time and money.
Have you ever been so infatuated with someone that you didn't notice a crime happening right in front of you?
“I’m 28. I make $4 million a year. What do you do?” yells the man-child douche-bag, David Brackett.
Some horrible young men in town have been caught exploiting teen girls.
V.25 No.4 | 01/28/2016
morgueFile / dean1986
Friday, Feb 5: Cesar Millan Live
By Renee Chavez [ Wed Feb 3 2016 10:47 AM ]
The star of "Dog Whisperer" reveals the secrets of happier, healthier relationships between humans and their beloved canines in his exciting live show.
V.24 No.51 | 12/17/2015
Lucky Paws via Facebook
A Howlin' Good Time
Sunday, Dec 27: Howl-i-day Give Back Tour 2015
By Megan Reneau [ Fri Dec 25 2015 11:00 AM ]
Help support the city's adoption site with the highest adoption rate and lowest return rate. Make a donation and select a new dog or cat toy to go into the giant stocking.
V.24 No.44 | 10/29/2015
Running of the Dogs
Sunday, Nov 1: Doggie Dash and Dawdle
By Megan Reneau [ Fri Oct 30 2015 6:00 PM ]
Highlights include a 5K chip-timed run, two-mile "fun walk," a Barketplace, live entertainment, "Doggie Carnival", Flying Houndz Frisbee, Nosing Around Scavenger Hunt and more.
V.24 No.42 | 10/15/2015
Saturday, Oct 24: Watermelon Mtn Ranch Halloween Pet Costume Contest
By Cerridwen Stucky [ Thu Oct 22 2015 5:00 PM ]
Dress up your pet and win prizes!
The Daily Word in the future is the present, who killed the four-year-old, and good old MJ
By Cerridwen Stucky [ Wed Oct 21 2015 2:48 PM ]
Today is Back to the Future day, but no one is in a hovercraft.
A road rage incident has the city in shock. There is now new information on the suspect.
A realistic portrayal of what Trump would do with his first 100 days in office.
Jaden Smith plans to disappear. Please don't leave us, you are an irreplaceable voice of insight in the blind modern day Hollywood.
Joe Biden isn't running for president, and lots of people are surprised.
Listen to Smooth Criminal played on traditional Japanese instruments.
V.24 No.37 | 09/10/2015
Loving Humans, Loving Pets, Loving Communities
2015 Link Conference
By Amelia Olson [ Sat Sep 12 2015 12:00 PM ]
This year's Link conference features national and local speakers including Lt. Andrea Taylor and Misha Goodman to highlight what other jurisdictions are doing with demonstrated success.
V.24 No.22 | 5/28/2015
The Daily Word in sumo wrestling, salmonella, Santolina and Sun Ra
By Constance Moss [ Fri May 22 2015 11:29 AM ]
Barclays plans to build Santolina: an entirely new city just outside Albuquerque.
40,000 bees were found under this woman’s bedroom floor.
Italy warns consumers of a Prosecco shortage.
A salmonella outbreak in the US linked to sushi tuna has sickened more thank 50 people.
An adult dating site was hacked, publicly revealing its users’ kinky turn-ons.
Here’s a glimpse into the life of a sumo wrestler.
These portly cats and dogs are participating in a pet slimming contest.
V.24 No.15 | 04/09/2015
The Daily Word in making the elderly comfortable, DOGS and oppressive military policies
By Amelia Olson [ Fri Apr 10 2015 10:26 AM ]
It's Friday and I'm kind of crabby and kind of excited for the lunch I packed. News is kind of good and kind of horribly depressing.
Live your life!
The military typically discharges transgender troops on medical grounds.
High five to Lovelace Westside Hospital for making their emergency room more comfortable for seniors. The new rooms feature softer lighting, clocks and signs that are easier to read.
A judge was all like “Bye, Felicia”and removed District Attorney Kari Brandenburg from the murder prosecution of two Albuquerque police officers who are accused of killing James Boyd. The judge stated a “conflict of interest.”
A man in Brazil posted an unexpectedly funny and poignant Facebook post and the internet REALLY liked it.
In case you're kinda dumb, here is a page explaining what a dog is.
V.24 No.14 | 4/2/2015
Canine coup strikes Hungary in animalistic revenge flick
By Devin D. O’Leary
Every dog has its day in animalistic revenge flick White God.
V.24 No.8 | 02/19/2015
This Week's Instagram Photo Contest Winner!
#alibipets February 13-19, 2015
By Amelia Olson [ Fri Feb 20 2015 3:58 PM ]
This week's contest simultaneously melted our hearts and brains. It's hard to decide a winner when every dang picture is the cutest thing on planet earth.
Here's a few of our favorites:
But since there can only be one winner, we all agreed Instagram user amandastclaire's picture turned our hearts into applesauce!
Congratulations, amandastclaire! We have $10 alibi bucks for you and a surprise waiting for you at our office! You can email email@example.com to redeem your prizes!
Stay tuned for next week's photo contest guidelines!
V.24 No.3 |
The Daily Word In Space Camp, Fake Babies and Becoming President
By Amelia Olson [ Wed Jan 21 2015 11:53 AM ]
It’s Wednesday! How are you? Have you been getting enough sleep and drinking enough water? Don’t get too worried about all the stuff you worry about, because it will all work out. Probably. Just take a deep breath, read these mostly uplifting stories, and remember that you are important and people love you.
The fake baby in American Sniper was snubbed at the Golden Globes. RUDE.
People who care about sports are freaking out about the deflated footballs used during the Patriots game.
Eight of the 43 presidents of the United States never went to college! TAKE THAT, DAD!
Your daily proof that dogs are real life angels.
TLC has created a Kickstarter to help finance a new album.
The highest paid Youtube star is a mysterious woman who clearly loves nail art and opens Disney toys.
V.24 No.2 |
The Daily Word In Secret Dungeons, Orangutans and Glitter
By Amelia Olson [ Wed Jan 14 2015 11:58 AM ]
If you receive an envelope full of glitter that is sure to get all over the damn place, it wasn't me!
Orangutans: they’re just like us!
THIS DOG TAKES HIMSELF TO THE DOG PARK ON THE BUS BECAUSE HE IS A GENIUS AND HAS LIFE FIGURED OUT MORE THAN ANY OF US.
Some guy signed a contract to buy the dormant missile silo in Roswell, taking it off the real estate market and proving that people are actually as bizarre and magnificent as they seem.
A man who was apparently wearing body armor was shot and killed near Constitution last night by APD. The story is still unfolding and there are many questions surrounding the incident.
A guy found a trap door in the closet of his recently rented studio apartment that lead to a secret dungeon. So...that’s totally terrifyingly creepy.
V.23 No.47 |
The Daily Word In Pissing Kate Middleton Off, Dogs Dressed Up As Turkeys And A 6-Year-Old Girl's Skateboarding Posse
By Amelia Olson [ Wed Nov 26 2014 12:14 PM ]
It’s Wednesday November 26th and this rude ass storm is ruining Thanksgiving!
Meanwhile in Southern California, three six-year-old girls are cooler than we will ever be, and skateboard all the damn time.
In Pakistan, 20-year-old Aansoo Kohli teaches 150 children in a shed, isn’t paid for the job, and is finishing her Bachelors Degree,
And if you’re American and you're reading this from your tent outside Best Buy while you wait for a 99 cent TV, joke's on you! You’re doing it wrong!
A local “cafeteria angel” is paying off student lunch debts at elementary schools anonymously and depositing money into needy families' bank accounts, because apparently some people care about other people?
And while the rest of us are consuming questionable amounts of alcohol this “holiday” season and arguing with our racist in-laws, these dogs are all that really matter this Thanksgiving.
Americans can't do anything right. We can’t even dress ourselves! Which really pisses Kate Midleton off. C'mon, you guys! Get it together!
Merry happy Thanksgiving, or whatever. Don’t drink and drive.
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