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The Daily Word in Russians need more sex, gonorrhea needs a cure and every tyrant needs a lover

Russian Prime Minister Valdimir Putin encourages his people to start having more sex to help a shrinking population.

A football coach resigns after accidentally posting a naked picture on Facebook.

The Center for Disease Control issues a warning that gonorrhea may soon become incurable.

A TSA agent gets creepy with a female passenger and makes her walk through a naked body scanner three times.

Love letters from some of history’s most notorious tyrants. Who knew Josef “I’m as lonely as a horned owl” Stalin could be such a softie?

New Mexico braces with all their might for the fire and brimstone unholiness that is gay marriage attemps on Valentine’s Day!

A father plays a pornographic film instead of The Smurfs at his child’s birthday party. Easy mistake.

Trips to Croatia’s incredibly awesome Museum of Broken Relationships nearly doubles on Valentine’s Day. Wonder how ticket sales compare to Iceland’s Phallological Museum?

Studies show a homeowner does better in the dating department than a renter.

In Santa Fe, the Senate approves a proposal to impose restrictions on undocumented immigrants getting driver’s licenses.

Again? Two Columbine High School students are injured in a campus hammer attack.

President Obama erases $226 million from the Mars exploration program and my dreams of martian discovery in one fell swoop.

Happy Valentine’s Day, from André 3000 and OutKast.

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The Daily Word 3.30.10: Christian Crazies, Ricky Martin, NASA

NYPD cops carry machine guns on subways in light of the recent Moscow suicide bombings.

Gonorrhea could become a drug-immune epidemic.

A hotel custodian calls in a bomb threat so he could have a day off.

The FBI raids Christian groups “preparing to do battle with the Anti-Christ.”

Ricky Martin, of Menudo and solo fame, finally decides to come out of the closet.

The Northeast prepares for possible historic flooding. What’s up with the massively epic natural disasters lately?

This is getting ridiculous: NASA joins the Toyota probe to explain the “cosmic ray electromagnetic interference” theory.

Ten people ages 8-21 shot dead by drug traffickers in Durango, México.

Karl Rove heckled and called a “war criminal” at a book signing in Beverly Hills.

A group is lobbying to have Ronald McDonald removed as the McDonald’s icon for luring kids into its McFattening McTrap.

Yet ANOTHER stabbing at a UNM area intersection.

Police catch 3 people suspected of committing more than 200 car burglaries.

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