governor martinez


V.25 No.10 | 03/10/2016

The Daily Word in Cat Accents, Tasty Plastic and Appreciative Robots

The Daily Word

Do cats have dialects? A new study plans on wasting five years and a shit-ton of money to find out the difference between mreow and meow.

NM lawmakers barely use their work email, and some of them seemed to have trouble responding to records request.(Ahem. We're looking at you, Gov. Martinez).

A new bacteria has been discovered that eats plastic. Keep it away from Heidi Montag!

No one pays attention to all the hard work you put in at the office? Don't start spitting in the water cooler; get yourself a Pat-On-the-Back machine. (The manufacturers of Pat-On-the-Back do not approve the use of their product for the patting of anything other than backs).

Dude found passed outin his car in the middle of Coors at 2pm with a bag of shrooms in the back seat next to his toddler. There's a lesson in there...

Hyperloop CEO showed off concepts for "augmented windows." Picture looking out a train at the Triassic period. Weird.

V.25 No.7 | 02/18/2016

News

The Daily Word in Dianna Duran, Cannabis and the Nations Kindest City

The Daily Word

Somehow Albuquerque was ranked the Nation's Kindest City. Oh, we were in contention with Detroit. I guess that's how.

"Cheesecake Factory expects strong NM debut," because, you know, that's obviously news.

A tiny home community named "Storybrook" is going to pop up soon. Look for the next season of Once Upon A Time to take place in a new, desert-y setting.

Governor Martinez implies credit for legislation happening.

Your out-of-state relatives should be happy to know about the projected increase of availability for pinon flavored coffee.


"Blah, blah, blah, Diane Duran, blah, blah, light sentencing" says attorney.


NM lawmakers find another way to blow it.

V.24 No.51 | 12/17/2015

news

The Daily Word in the misogyny of Donald Trump vs the misogyny of Steve Harvey

The Daily Word

An APD officer shot and killed a man last night.

An Albuquerque city councilor wants to stop people from panhandling at lucrative on/off ramps.

New Mexico's oil industry isn't happy about the steep drop in oil prices.

There's a new police officer lapel recording of drunken Governor Martinez.

An appeals court ruled on behalf of an Asian-American band called The Slants that the government can't deny a copyright on the grounds that something is offensive.

Trump continues to prove he is misogynist.

The sexual ecstasy terror threat level is high.

Stop what you are doing and immediately grok this Steve Harvey "wisdom".

V.23 No.25 |

news

The Daily Word in victim shaming, fake penises and foiled school shootings

The Daily Word

Good morning! It's Wednesday, June 25,

and the attorney representing a UNM football player who was accused of rape has publicly released a cell phone video showing his client and the alleged victim "in numerous and different sexual positions,"

Taos is still wrestling with whether or not to rename Kit Carson park after something other than the man in charge of the "Long Walk" where thousands of Navajos were forcibly relocated from their homelands,

a group of anti-abortion protestors think that Gov. Martinez isn't "pro-life" enough,

and an Albuquerque man tried and failed to use a fake penis called "the Whizzinator" to pass a drug test.

Meanwhile

a teenager who planned an attack on his school involving multiple guns, bombs and molotov cocktails thinks he might be mentally ill,

the Supreme Court ruled that police need a warrant to search your cell phone,

and a man in Queens walked into a McDonald's with a knife sticking out of his back. "He was cool and calm," said his friend.

Have a great day!

V.22 No.14 |

news

The Daily Word in bedbug weaknesses, the end of racism and better call Saul!

The Daily Word

Gov. Martinez is bringing in big bucks for her re-election campaign.

UNM's Sigma Alpha Epsilon chapter has been suspended due to an alleged sexual assault. That sounds familiar. Really familiar.

To the world's jerkiest vandal: Please stop stealing the handlebars off of ghost bikes.

Two border patrol agents are on trial for forcing drug runners to eat marijuana, then setting their clothes on fire. Then letting them go.

Nature's super-villain, the bed bug, has a super-weakness.

Breaking Bad has been great, the best ever really, but our supply of the good stuff won't last much longer. What to do? Better call Saul!

Brad Paisley and LL Cool J have teamed up to end racism! With a really terrible song. That includes the lyric "If you don't judge my gold chains / I'll forget the iron chains."

V.21 No.37 |

news

The Daily Word in Joe Arpaio, Chris Stevens, Susanna Martinez, Paul Watson, and Lynette

The Daily Word

Rio Arriba County residents comment on Sheriff's department's shorter business hours.

Games, food and safety.

"The Mad Men effect."

A Valencia County man is mad at Governor Martinez and some cows.

"This is Jail, get over it."

In Denmark, public transportation is completely awesome.

Eco-fugitive Paul Watson is hiding out somewhere at sea.

Collection of the "Rahm Emanuel likes Nickelback" dude's protest signs.

Latest on the "Innocence of Muslims" video, backlash, and weirdness.

How the restricting of the "Innocence of Muslims" video in some countries demonstrates web-firms' role in free speech and censorship.

Anyone can make a "reply-all" goof.

Someone stole the strategic maple syrup reserve!

"This Man Beats Women" advisory on Chris Brown CDs.

Record-setting tightrope-walkers did it without a net.

Anthrax-tainted heroin in the U.K.

Gallery of "On The Road" book covers.

Lynette from "Shit 'Burquenos Say" is now working for UNM.

On this day in 1965, Lost in Space premiered.

V.21 No.27 |

News

The Daily Word in NM Drug Court investigations, litigiousness, "acts of daily living," a naked crimewave, and Romney-Venn Diagrams

The Daily Word

If your computer is infected with this virus, you will be denied access to the internet beginning next week.

The NM state email investigation is getting more and more complicated.

Judge Pat Murdoch will likely face new charges having something to do with female participants in the piece of the Drug Court Program he presided over.

Drug Court in Northern New Mexico is under investigation for possible embezzlement among other things.

An Audit reveals that APD handed out a lot of unqualified bonuses from 2008 to 2011.

In case you didn't know, Quebecois need a french word for EVERYTHING.

The most litigious man in the world is suing Herman Cain and Kim Kardashian for attacking him while the two were making a sex tape in a Pizza Hut bathroom.

Nation's ongoing naked crimewave. More PCP crime.

Best Buy competes in stupid business-decision-making Olympics.

Politician in Jordan shows us how to debate on T.V. like really angry, shoe-throwing, pistol-packing men do.

Some cities are banning public "acts of daily living" i.e, "homelessness."

Former and original bass player from Cro-Mags totally flipped out on the current Cro-Mags line-up at CBGB Festival.

Mitt Romney's Venn Diagrams look like Venn Diagrams but don't work like Venn Diagrams, so... are they Venn Diagrams?

Hey, "a lot of women tend to forget this is a man's world."

Is Marxism relevant today?

Men in suits get away with things.

Watch this Greek newscaster get egged and Mike Milled on air.

The last minutes of Air France flight 447.

The Valley of Gwangi.