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V.22 No.6 | 2/7/2013

Alibi Sex Survey

Weekly Alibi’s First Ever Sex Survey

By Carl Petersen
Are bicycles sexy? I don't think so, and we were fairly careful not to ask about bicycles when we developed our First Ever Sex Survey. That notwithstanding, bicycles came up … along with graveyards, pancakes, rimming and other seemingly endless whatnots in the mountainous avalanche of data our survey produced. And cars. It seems like lots of people in Albuquerque are having sex in cars, so pay attention, and lock up next time you're in the parking garage.

Nearly 1,500 people responded to our survey. Who were these people? Let's consult the pie charts.

What did we learn? I'll leave that to our panel of experts.

Alibi Sex Survey

Sexy Body Parts, Turn-Offs and More

By Hunter Riley
If Albuquerque were a man, he would be an ass man. Based on the results from the sex survey, it was the highest reported sexiest body part. But don’t worry if you’re wishing you had more junk in the trunk, the second-highest rated sexiest body part were the windows to your soul.

Alibi Sex Survey

My secret turn-on is …

By Wrathchild

The results are in, and it comes as no surprise that the Duke is one kinky city. The purpose of sex has evolved for many into a recreational activity, rather than a species-perpetuating endeavor. Note that, of the 800+ answers, not a single response included “procreation.” Instead, we see a varied, colorful list of hedonistic sensory indulgences, elaborate fantasies, yearnings for specific body parts, items of clothing, bodily fluids, and appetites for complicated sex acts that would challenge even the most adept multi-tasker.

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Alibi Sex Survey

My sexiest experience ever was ...

By Julian Wolf

While reviewing the results from the Alibi's first sex survey, I was delighted to see that many of our neighbors play very well with others. Within the confines of relationships and randomness of delightful happenstance, friends are hooking up with friends, couples with couples and sometimes just inviting others to watch. In addition to these delightful tromps into the land of non-monogamy, my heart was warmed by the dozens of contributions that gush about partners, husbands, wives and every combination therein.

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Alibi Sex Survey

Albuquerque’s Sexiest Staff

By Gregory J. Pleshaw

I once heard it said from a very wise man in the restaurant industry that "men go where the women are—and women go where the bathrooms are clean."

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Alibi Sex Survey

Celebrity Sex

By Devin D. O’Leary

Call it “The List,” call it a “hall pass,” slap whatever name on it you like: Even the most committed couples can make concessions for their partners sleeping with other people. So long as those other people are celebrities. The thinking is twofold. Firstly, long-term relationship or not, you’d be a fool to pass up an opportunity to manhandle People Magazine's “Sexiest Man Alive.” Secondly, your odds of meeting, seducing and actually closing the deal with a famous person are slim-to-none—so what’s the harm in a little fantasy fling?

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Alibi Sex Survey

Sexy Albuquerque Fun Facts

By Carl Petersen
53.4% of us never engage in cyber sex, 80.8% of us like to talk dirty, 74.3% of us have made out with a stranger—and other fascinating stats.

Alibi Sex Survey

Fifty Shades of Yellow

BDSM Tips for Newbies

By Wrathchild
The rampant popularity of E.L. James’ Fifty Shades of Grey has moved BDSM and fetishism from taboo to mainstream. However, the fetish community had a fairly negative reaction to this book for multiple reasons. Aside from painting the community in a negative light, the book conveys the grave misconception that any goober in possession of necktie can magically become a dungeon master overnight. The reality is that BDSM, a compound acronym for Bondage, Discipline, Dominance/submission, and Sadomasochism, is very much a delicate art form and can be potentially dangerous without the proper protocol and precautions. Here are a few tips for those adventurous lovers hoping to expand their horizons this Valentine's.

Alibi Sex Survey

Non-Monogamy 101

By Julian Wolf

Curious about consensual non-monogamy? Well, you've come to the right place. In a world where there is open communication and negotiation no one has to cheat, and the likelihood of having your needs met (and even your fantasies and desires) is very high. We're going to cover the basics, and if that whets your appetite or peaks your interest, we'll include some easy ways to find out more.

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Alibi Sex Survey

Sex Tips from the Alibi Survey

By Hunter Riley, Self Serve Store Manager

Now that the cat is out of the bag, what are you going to do with the information? Learning about sex can be intimidating, but it doesn’t have to be. Self Serve is Albuquerque’s Best Sexy Shop, as voted by Alibi readers, and can offer an alternative to the old-school sex shop. Now that you have some of the intimate details of your fellow Albuquerqueans, you can proceed with confidence and dive into your fantasies head first. Here are some of our tips based on the survey results, but feel free to check us out online for more info at selfservetoys.com

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Alibi Sex Survey

Graphic Graphs

We had more sexy graphs that we could fit in print!

By Hunter Riley
Three really is the lucky number according to survey takers. The third date was the most common answer for number of dates before you get physical with a lucky friend. But don’t worry, second and first dates were the next most popular times to break out the condoms and lube.
V.22 No.4 | 1/24/2013

Sex Survey

Take the Alibi’s First Ever Sex Survey!

By Nick Brown [ Wed Jan 23 2013 5:22 PM ]

Roses are red, violets are blue. If you a take our sex survey, I guess I will, too. It’s really short and not terribly invasive (multiple choice, short answer) and you can even skip some of the questions if they’re too hard. For example, it took me a while to think of a sexy celebrity … just like when I walk into a book store and can’t think of a single book I want. At any rate, I finally thought of one that reminds me of my wife. Maybe I’ll run into that famous lady at a party sometime and be tempted to pay her water bill. One can dream.

V.22 No.3 |

news

The Daily Word in hostages, suicide, fraud and sex

By Geoffrey Plant [ Sat Jan 19 2013 12:07 PM ]
The Daily Word

A woman jumped or fell from Sandia Crest.

The Governor of NM signed her husband's name on an absentee ballot request.

Bad seed.

This guy brings his AR-15 to JC Penny's.

In case you haven't heard, the U.S. government recommends disabling Java.

A whiskey from Waco, TX won the latest "Best in Glass" competition.

Is Obamacare doomed?

The Algerian hostage crisis is over.

Those controversial "naked" security scanners will be removed from airports.

Torontonians are sexy.

Federal government has indicted New Orleans' former mayor Ray Nagin on fraud charges.

V.21 No.49 | 12/6/2012
Brokencyde
Brokencyde

Music

Best of Burque’s worst band

By Samantha Anne Carrillo [ Thu Dec 6 2012 2:00 PM ]

Music writer Geoffrey Plant delved into the world of Brokencyde in Parody or Pabulum. Presumably, Plant took on this task because he’s a braver man than I am. I remember the first time I stumbled onto the horror that is Brokencyde. Slack-jawed, I watched the act’s music video for “Freaxx,” which is included below—along with a couple other wastes of YouTube bandwith—for your viewing displeasure.

Brokencyde

Aural Fixation

Parody or Pabulum

Brokencyde’s best-of is the worst

By Geoffrey Plant
Music writer Geoffrey Plant deconstructs Burque’s most tasteless and financially successful act, Brokencyde.
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