V.25 No.5 | 02/04/2016
The Daily Word in Johnny Cash Spiders, Fresh Air Sales and Fake Simpsons
By Joshua Lee [ Sun Feb 7 2016 10:58 AM ]
A newly discovered tarantula has been named Aphonopelma johnnycashi, due to its thick black coat, it's proximity to Folsom prison (seriously) and after its admission that it killed a man in Reno, just to watch him die.
If you plan on hiring hitmen to kill your wife, you'd better make sure they do the job. Otherwise, she might do what this Australian woman did and crash her own funeral.
4 new species of flatworm that fit on the head of a dime discovered. They have no brains or organs, just a sack for a stomach and a mouth that eats and poops.
Fat, dumb, yellow dad. Beehive-sporting mom. Little girl in a red dress and pearls. That's right! It's everyone's favorite cartoon fam from the nation of Georgia: The Samsonadzes. And if that sounds too familiar to you, check out the opening credits sequence. Sheesh.
According to neurobiologist Douglas Fields, the same group of neurons that help you react quickly in times of danger are the same ones that make people "just snap."
DWI penalties became a whole lot stiffer last week, even though we had the lowest number of drunk-
God bless the free market! A British man is selling £80 jars of fresh air to the Chinese. And they're buying it.
Here's an amazing collection of photos taken during the Vietnam war by the North Vietnamese and the Viet Cong.
V.21 No.40 |
The Daily Word in stealing debates, stealing space shuttles, stealing weed, and recovering stolen maple syrup
By Geoffrey Plant [ Sat Oct 6 2012 6:30 PM ]
Now we have a plan for stealing one of the Space Shuttles.
Al Qaeda strategy involves lighting forest fires.
Grandmother protects her weed crop by confronting thieves with bear-spray.
People think you have to know someone in order to get a local government job, and they're right.
People think it's conceited for Taos officials to name public buildings after themselves, and they're right.
"I pooped the question. She said yes."
Police are following up on leads as some of Canada's stolen strategic maple syrup reserve surfaces.
Watch (and cry) as these former lab-chimps go outside for the first time.
In Florida, it is against the law to annoy a manatee.
On this day in 2000, Slobodan Milosovic resigned.
V.21 No.12 |
The Daily Word in racist comics, staff cuts for Newt and Winrock revitalization
By Tom Nayder [ Wed Mar 28 2012 8:06 AM ]
Why is a there an effort to smear the reputation of Trayvon Martin?
Construction to revitalize Winrock Mall begins next week.
Dude, this racist cartoon is pretty racist, even for Texas.
Guess which Republican Presidential candidate just let go of a third of his full-time staff?
Magdalena's only grocery store is closing.
Fox News hoodies disappear from online store and somehow it's not a conspiracy.
New species of hammerhead shark discovered.
'Dinosaur' and 'dancing' are some of the 50 forbidden words to be removed from standardized tests in New York.
JFK airport employees responsible for 200 thefts per day.
Pharmacies are lying to teenagers about emergency contraception.
Sometimes it's hard being an
Taiwanese woman chats with Facebook friends as she kills herself.
According to a new study, rubbing toothpaste onto your teeth with your fingers will increase fluoride protection by a whopping 400%.
Someone's got a case of the Mondays.
Watch 130 'Simpsons' openings at the same time, for science.
Jethro Tull's Ian Anderson says "Thick as a Brick 2" is coming.
Trailer for a new "Lupin the 3rd" TV series.
Laugh at these treadmill fails.
De-porn your browser before your mom comes to visit.
Hey, remember Luscious Jackson?
V.20 No.50 |
The Daily Word in Dear Leaders, political assassinations and President Palin
By Tom Nayder [ Tue Dec 20 2011 11:47 AM ]
China recognizes Kim Jong Un as North Korea's new leader.
Sunni chief denies ordering the deaths of his political enemies.
Sarah Palin thinks it's not too late.
A new casino may be coming to the fairgrounds.
Three local restaurants receive red stickers.
R.I.P. Captain America co-creator Joe Simon.
Should you get a QR-code tattoo?
Keep it cool guys, Jon Bon Jovi is not dead.
This youtube video about the Norwegian butter shortage will change your freaking life.
Keep those brain-eating amoebas out of your neti pot.
V.20 No.37 |
The Daily Word in freed hikers, geniuses and suicide by rollercoaster
By Tom Nayder [ Wed Sep 21 2011 10:09 AM ]
Two years after accidentally hiking into Iran, Josh Fattal and Shan Bauer have been freed.
Is Troy Davis's scheduled execution America's worst miscarriages of justice?
Masked gunmen dump 35 dead bodies in the middle of a busy Boca Del Rio street.
Gary Johnson gets a spot in tomorrow's presidential debate.
Federal prosecutors call online poker site a global Ponzi scheme.
Republican leaders sent a letter to the Federal Reserve Chairman asking him to “resist further extraordinary intervention in the U.S. economy.”
A mother abducted her eight children in New York.
Personnel board votes to lay-off 27 state workers.
New questions in the deadly Reno air show crash.
Once again, I was not named a MacArthur Genius.
Here's a video flyover of the asteroid Vesta.
Facebook changed again last night.
Nobody wants a ginger baby.
Steven Colbert really really wants to broaden the tax base.
Most epic post-car accident interview ever.
This roller coaster is the future of suicide.
23 rejected covers of famous books.
I know you're lazy, but are you lazy enough for Forever Lazy?
I think this may be exciting news for fans of Magic: The Gathering.
If you're interested in getting some Venture Bros. action figures you should read this.
Gordon Ramsay gets another TV show.
This is awesome. And weird. But still awesome.
R.I.P. Tom Wilson, creator of Ziggy.
Fox is considering creating a 24-hour Simpsons channel.
Mike Tyson broke Steve-O's nose at the Charlie Sheen roast.
There have been some pretty terrible Star Wars video games, but was this one the worst?
This one is for fans of The Wire only.
V.20 No.7 |
The Daily Word 2.19.11: Bingaman's seat; demise of Dewey decimal; fink on Berlusconi
By Geoffrey Plant [ Sat Feb 19 2011 10:29 AM ]
Senator Jeff Bingaman announced his retirement. It's going to be like amphetamine musical chairs when he vacates his seat.
House republicans pass bill to implement enormous spending cuts. Hey Boehner, read my lips: "VETO."
Forest Service is afraid people will fall into holes in the Sandia mountains.
The dumbing down continues. Victim: The Dewey Decimal System.
Protesters are being killed, arrested and intimidated in Lybia, Iran, Yemen. NY Times Blog.
Speaking of intimidation, this Senate bill would make the publishing of classified information a felony.
By the way: despite popular opinion, Wikileaks has revealed a ton of important information that the hoi polloi didn't know before.
Breaking news regarding sharks.
Wild mug shot of suspected catalytic converter criminal.
Turn back the hands of time with Matt Groening's Father's 1969 short film "Basic Brown, Basic Blue."
Today is Cracker Jack Day. On this day in 1912, the first prize was placed in a box of Cracker Jack.
V.20 No.1 |
The Daily Word 01.12.11: Blood Libel, Insane Clown Posse, Simpsons Porno
By Tom Nayder [ Wed Jan 12 2011 9:09 AM ]
Sarah Palin is accusing the media of blood libel.
Arizona says only more guns can stop gun violence.
The perfect drug mule was caught in Philadelphia.
You will not be able to unsee this trailer for the Simpsons porno parody.
Professor arrested for having a suspicious bagel on a plane.
Get your facepaint! Insane Clown Posse has officially confirmed the Gathering of the Juggalos 2011.
Fermilab's particle accelerator is shutting down, leaving the search for the Higgs boson up to the Large Hadron Collider.
Soon we'll be eating bugs for dinner.
The Roll Your Own iPhone app attracts 25,000 downloads its first day available.
Watch as flash floods in Australia clear an entire parking lot of cars.
How does compound interest work if you're immortal?
Local hoarder's home to be cleaned by neighbors, and again in six months.
New metallic glass is stronger than steel. Just like that Star Trek movie!
Woman arrested for allegedly shooting her husband's penis off.
Turns out Kanye West's banned album cover publicity stunt really was a publicity stunt.
The best streaking video I've ever seen!
The film industry is not happy about Gov. Martinez's plan to raise their taxes.
Just try to bring a killer chocolate egg into the country. Just try.
If I wasn't so damn hungry, I'd probably think Burger King's new Jalapeño & Cheddar Stuffed Steakhouse burger was pretty gross.
Happy birthday Rob Zombie!
V.19 No.31 | 8/5/2010
Lisa Simpson would have theoretically gotten married yesterday
By Marisa Demarco [ Mon Aug 2 2010 1:25 PM ]
... if she were allowed to age. Move over, Chelsea Clinton.
This still is from an episode that aired in 1995.
But Lisa will remain 8 years old forever as best anyone can tell. Plus, maybe she’s really the kind of girl that doesn’t believe in marriage anyway.
10th Annual Southwest Funnyfest at KiMo Theatre
A night of non-stop, side-splitting, no-apologies comedy with four of the nation’s top female comedians.
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