Letters

Take That, Walgreens

Dear Walgreens Parking Enforcer,

It was brought to my attention by you that it was “common sense” and universal that everyone should know all Walgreens parking lots across the globe allow for no more than 30 minute parking. Even if there is only one or two barely visible signs surrounding the parking lot, and I could not see any of them where I parked, as I pointed out to you, you still insisted this was “common sense.”

After making a purchase at Walgreens off Central near the UNM area, I decided to go across the street for some lunch. Being gone for only a half hour tops, I came back to find that my van had been towed. You stand outside yapping on the phone to your significant other as I wait patiently for you to get off the phone, then you tell me that it is “common sense.”

Yes, my friend, if only I could have told you that it was once “common sense” to genocide native people and kick them off their home land, only so one day we could establish wonderful corporate entities such as Walgreens! Bringing legal drugs to people in supersize quantities, just as McDonald’s has brought you supersized meals to clog your arteries! (So you can buy Angioprim pills for your clogged arteries at Walgreens.) And maybe they’ll even tow your car through some sketchy towing company while you are in the store and make you pay $140 to get it out!

But of course, you had nothing to do with it. You were so concerned about my well-being you only waited till you saw me leave to call the tow company right away, rather than kindly informing me that there was a 30-minute limit. In which case, I could’ve moved it. But hey, every jerk has to make a daily quota!

It’s OK. You were probably just mentally asleep and dreaming of your next dollar like the rest of us. All while the politicians are asleep and dreaming of our death in the name of their dollar.

Please let me inform you, sir, that the Nazi party were sure they knew what “common sense” was too.

Anyways, have a good day and enjoy your time well spent making others miserable!

A Wicked Pissah of an Errah

Dear Alibi,

As a transplant from New England, I have to point out a mistake in "A Decade's Detritus" [Feature] from your Jan. 7-13th issue.

Under sports you've listed the Lakers as winning both the 2008 and 2009 NBA Championship. This is a wicked pissah of an errah. The Boston Celtics won the 2008 series 4-2.

Many thanks,

Editor’s Response / Correction

The point goes to Zagami. Last week's "A Decade’s Detritus" feature incorrectly listed the NBA Finals champions for the years 2008, 2006, 2004 and 2003. Sincere apologies to the Boston Celtics, Miami Heat, Detroit Pistons and San Antonio Spurs, respectively, and their loyal fans.

Please don’t stuff us into a locker.